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Tongue in Mouth

bycymry©
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by Anonymous

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by Anonymous10/06/05

~

"I watch the birds
eating the seeds
of discontent"

I like the mix with the new and familiar.

I am not crazy about "gal" for some reason, seems too old fashioned for this poem? I don't know. Just my feeling. :)

SR

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by ravenx10/07/05

fantistic!

Another brilliant poem, my love. excellent excution. Aa wonderfull play on words.

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by sweet GA peaches10/14/05

I think,

expression of longing,
speaks volumes my friend..

-sGp-

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by 10/23/05

A real sense of longing!

I think gal is fine. I'm your woman/I'm your girl: neither of these sound right.

I really like the last phrase: But don’t take
too long, the days are growing shorter by the minute.

A powerful, sad sense of time passing!

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