All Comments on 'Decisions'

by RedHairedandFriendly

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  • 6 Comments
My Erotic TaleMy Erotic Taleover 18 years ago
descisions

wow, gripping read.

Grasping the handle of a door locked tight

gauging the moment to take off in flight.

very nice poem. (~_*)

LeBrozLeBrozover 18 years ago
~~

Super!

One of your best yet!

And worked up to such an end of promise.

AnonymousAnonymousover 18 years ago
So dark, so sad, and yet . .

So full of hope. Dream on. Thank You. Ronnie W.

AnonymousAnonymousover 18 years ago
~I~

Your poem was mentioned in the new poems review thread.

Tess

ReltneReltneover 18 years ago
To Rhyme or not??

It is the poet's choice about whether to rhyme or not, but once you start you should stick with it!

You chose an AABB rhyme scheme, but:

"time" & "mine" do not rhyme, nor do

"kiss" & "wish"

nor

"by" & "sublime"

Sorry, While the theme is worthwhile, for a rhyming poem this one is structurally below average.

WickedEveWickedEveover 18 years ago
As far as rhyme goes,

the two near rhymes aren't that bad. By and sublime really don't work. Some near rhymes can work. With this subject matter, the poem would be stronger if you didn't rhyme, or if you tried a more complex rhyme scheme, or a form like a villanelle. Just suggestions. :)

Anonymous
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