All Comments on 'Sketches...afternoon'

Great sketch.

I like this line: winking in and out

Good poem and drawing, but I wish there were a few less ellipses.

Sketches…afternoon

Somewhere along the way…

I lost myself in her

woken from a reverie…

realizing I exist no more

breathing only through her

feeling only through her

knowing only through her

Sketches…afternoon

Somewhere along the way…

I lost myself in her

woken from a reverie…

realizing I exist no more

breathing, feeling, knowing

only through her. - Maybe?

I think there were too many "her" words in the poem, and you could've done without them. The ellipses didn't seem to bother me much but I'd try to go for the right punctuation. The poem has great potentional and I enjoyed. There's only a few things I would work on. Thanks for sharing! Beautiful picture!

Very nicely done

Perhaps a bit too heavy on the hers;

Keep it light and subdued

In the style of that excellent illustration.

the same savagewolf I know?? I enjoyed the poem and found the sketch to be a great picture as well as an addition to the poem.

Once her sexual wares have been discovered ~ sexual addiction sets in ~ I have lost myself in her. Illustration certainly bears out the meaning of this rendering.

of giving to another. TK U MLJ LV NV