The Homeless Man

Wow

You gotta be kidding me. Another ass kicker in a long line that keeps on going like the energizer rabbit. Just keep on keeping on, dude, and don't mind the naysayers.

best laugh

i've had in weeks, great story. a fan always.

Another good one

Grey Eagle:
You are a word wizard. It took all of my being to keep from jumping to the botttom of the page to see how it was going to end. Being patient was worth it. Thank You. Ronnie W.

dumb

Lackluster story, dreadfull editing. Bad tattoos.

Sneaky

I thought I knew the ending untill I got to it.
Fooled me

Wow

What a ending!!!

Boyd

You are a sick fuck!

I expect that your feel grateful if your dog fucks you in the ass,

......

*sound of riotous laughter*

oh jesus...that was funny!

AND believeable....to put this in 'reality' IF you are so shattered by what you saw, do you REALLY think that some, well badly placed tattoos will fix it?

Counciling and therapy maybe. Tats no....

Grey thank you, I needed that laugh.

BAD REALLY BAD

No two people are that drunk!!! He wanted her and he fucked her when she was out of it. she wanted him or she would have stopped her. Enough said! They cheated and got caught! It will happen again.

OK ENDING

GREAT AS USUAL, YOUR STORIES ARE GREAT BUT THIS ENDING SURE FOOLED ME. KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK.

I hope you have the placement of the tattoos wrong

Because to whoever is reading them they will read as Mitchell Jonathon...

I've read a few of

your stories and just don't know what to make of them. They start out really well and then, I don't know, just become unrealistic. You have talent...I just haven't figured out why you don't use it.

terrible ending

Actually the story is 100, but the ending is so bad that I had to comment. you are such a good writer, and every time i see you as the author I will read it. I was surely disappointed with this ending. Sorry. Hope you will re due it.

The Reality

Hey in the real world, this betrayal of loyalty usually results in death. You have done much better by torturing the betrayers.
You usually grant forgiveness, but here to forgive you would have to forget first

What a switch.......

OK, was the ending going to please everyone? Nope! But if
it had happened to you 3 months earlier, you would probably
react the same way. I might.

What did she expect? She got caught nailing his brother and
says she was drunk? Oh darn, no harm, no foul there. And if
she had been with the whole 101st Airborne.....with them standing in a line a mile long?? No harm there either? Just when does a spouse have to be accountable?

AND she screwed his BROTHER...AND his brother screwed his
beloved wife!! What would have done? No shit..all of you people griping here....WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE DONE? He cried
when he saw her, but she thought that was positive? He was
feeling something...is that something like pulling the wings
off a butterfly to see if it feels something? Lucky guy.

Nope, she got what she deserved. Tell the family what happened and let the chips fall where they may. The brother
says he loved his younger brother? And his wife loved her
husband? Hope my wife never loves me that much. She had it
made and couldn't keep her panties up....if he had screwed
around on her...?? That is different, he is a guy and we
can't control our hormones that well. Right? OK, tongue
is firmly in cheek, just pulling your chain, but seriously..
if my wife and my brother did this...life really wouldn't
ever be the same for me. If you would forgive her and take
her back, then have Christmas dinner with your brother - -
you are the sick f--k, not the writer.

the calendar

Good Story, excellent in fact, but the tatts were done after the 'event' so the final kiss-off doesn't make sense, the tatts WEREN'T THERE on the night of the event, for brother to kiss over.

Very good story

Nice ending too. Made perfect sense to me.

As for the tats, who said it was a one time thing and, even if it was, who said the husband had to get over it and not visualize them together over and over?

If I was the huaband, I would have a very hard time believing that both of them could have 'accidentally' fucked the other too. Even one being so out of it that they didnt know what was going on but could still fuck is stretching thing. That both could be in a similar state at the same time and place and innocently fuck each other silly is just unbelievably long odds.

I thought it was a very good story.

good

I would have to say this is one of your better stories

The story/plot was not bad

Its the the writing itself that is lacking. I suggest that you print your stories and read them out loud before you submit them.

I'm not sure..

Assuming that the author has told us the truth about what happened, it will take a whole chapter to convince her husband that what happened, that it was an accident from alcohol.
How does she do that?

Good Story, bad ending

I would have given this story a one hundred rating had the ending been better, it just leaves to many questions, I think you should write a short follow up to give the story closure. Other then the ending great story.

Nothing from nothing

I reread this piece of crap 2 times and I still dont get it.What are you saying,Sam been fucking Adam all along?Was this one of many? Your whole story just dosnt hold together.The way I read this piece of cow dung,is hubby is an asshole and going off the deep end like he did,Sam was better off without the stupid ass.

Good story, terrible ending

What kind of ending is that? It resolves nothing. What happens to him? What happens to her, or the brother? Does he ever recover? I can understand writing a story where the rest is implied and you don't need to fill in the details, but that's not the case here. Please fix with a sequel.

Laughably bad inept bizzare writing

the ending to this turd of story is so bad I dont know how to say it ... there are not enough words to express the silliness of the ending..

tattos on her pussy and tits? OMG.....

Look the wife is whore... and the marriage is over. They both put the drunk hubby in the other room!! why ? to be alone to fuck.... the brother admitted he has always wanted to fuck the wife...

and she let him. suppose the reconcile... what is Hubby going to say or think... "by the way dear remember what happened last time you drunk? you FUCKED my brother and drove me INSANE for 3 month"

not a good way to run a marriage

wagon tongue

Just a simple little problem. Adam "had it in" for his brother.

Great Story Idea

The story idea was fantastic.

Your writing style is very good.

The presentation of the act of infidelity and the reasoning for it, sucked. With the fact that the story was too short to be develop fully, you logically placed too much of your (our) concentration on solely the husband figure. (modus ponens)

Still, if developed further, this could be a story of very high quality.

drunk again

I'm getting sick of heavy drinking as an excuse for infidelity. It only removes inhibitions - not change the total moral code. So nice try bitch, but bitch nevertheless.

Rot in Hell Girl

Samantha and Adam can rot in hell Jonathan should dissown the rotten bitch and Adam
pat
Atlanta,Ga

Good idea, terrible execution

Tolerable writing but the plot is too fantastic to be believable. The characters are like bad actors in a "B" movie with overhyped emotions and terrible dialog. The sad part is that I found the premise interesting but the execution of the story was awful.

I thank you for your effort.

Huh???

What the hell is this shit about?? It started off really well I thought but at the end it leaves me "Dazed and Confused". Some further work on the ending is needed in order to readable.

I finally figured it out

You actually did get past the second grade and do know how to spell, you just deliberately misspell every 50 or 60 words, or maybe you set yourself a quota to misspell so many to get a reaction from your readers.

Of course you could be just too lazy to bother to try to spell correctly. Who knows? Why do I bother ot try to read your stories. I should just read to the first misspelled word to make sure you have not changed then zero out your score.

I agree with

12/03/05 by in Michigan, you start good but end most of your stories like this one. What is it with you? You like going out of your way to write your stories to get bad reviews, if you do, I just don't get it? I've read maybe a dozen of your stories, and I think I've given you only 2 positive inputs. I don't think I want to waste any more of my time reading your stuff, sorry, you could be a pretty good writer.

Interesting ideas

Now that was a change of pace,, a slow ball turned into a fast ball! Thanks

chapter 2 please

what happens next? please write a chapter 2.

Great ending, or...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHLMAO

The End?

I agree - how about ending it. You left it somewhat up in the air.

Funny!!!!

At last a fun story. BRAVO

Left / Right MItchell Jonathan

I thought I remembered reading a comment about the handedness of the tatts.
If over the Left one is "Jonathan" and over the right " Mitchell", then as a pair, they will read " Mitchell Jonathan "

If no one has mentioned this before, then i have, now.

Cheers,
Kilroy.

Great story.

I am so glad he didn't forgive them. He is going to need a LOT of therapy. Even then, he is probably going to leave his wife.
Great work.

Wow, everybody needs to stop and take a deep breath and relax. Many loved the ending due to their belief that he should leave the "cheating" wife. However, in this situation, cutting your nose off to spite your face comes to mind. Assuming that the author has described all of the pertinent details, there is no reason to believe that she has been anything other than a model wife to that point.

Further, she seems to be a very good catch (a nice piece of ass among other things). Contrary to what one comment indicated, she and the brother were not fucking each other silly. They were interrupted right after he entered her. The author described her as being in a dream-like state and believing that it was her husband. Cheesy yes, but that is what we have to work with. We don't know what she might have done if she had opened her eyes and fully recognized who it really was. She might have said "Fuck me Adam" or she might have punched him in the nose, jumped up and said "What the fuck do you think you are doing?"

Jon is obviously a weak man. A strong man would have confronted them, at least after a few hours of cooling off, rather than disappearing for months. He would have demanded an explanation. He is also partly to blame for the situation occurring to start with. Instead of always laughing off his brother's attempts to flirt with his wife, he should have put his foot down and told him he did not appreciate that kind of attention being paid to her.

In the scope of the life he has had and might still have with her, this seems to be a relatively minor mistake. Relationships like the one the author describes do not happen that often. Certainly it would take some time to forgive her and he would have to watch her closely for a while. She would have to be willing to be watched as well. However, the person he is hurting the most by the position he appears to be taking is himself.

Frankly, I am surprised that the author decided to end the story this way. I guess he just really wanted a different twist.

P.S. I guess the tattoos added something. However, it would have been more funny if he had said "Well, I thought I might take you back, but I hate tattoos so get the fuck out of here!"

good read

Loved the ending

nice story for a change GE 286

you know you like to take the woman back. And better ending just because you still find a cheating slut a catch says alot your choices

Excellent

Even worse than a wife's betrayal is a brother's betrayal. Fuck the both of them. He's better off a bum in the street than to reconnect with cheating assholes. FUCK

KEEP ON WITH THE CONTINUING STORY

but keep track of all the lies and time frames. TK U MLJ LV NV

Lol

Ha! I liked this story but I loved the ending! Ha! I don't care if they were "drunk" if you drink so much to the point where you don't know your sticking your dick inside of your brothers wife -- needless to say you should quit drinking... The wife is pathetic how the hell she couldn't tell the difference between her husbands dick & his brothers? I can be in a deep sleep & be able to decipher my husbands hands, lips, & dick, so I really can't understand how she couldn't tell the difference .....

Hmmmm

I've read several of your stories now. I can't decide if you are trying to emulate JPB or Huedogg. Neither of them have the talent to become anything more than note takers.

Perfect. I hate infidelity - and -

I hate tattooed bitches. 5 stars.

If you want to read about a worse betrayal

Read Molly and Her Sisters.

Loved it

The perfect little twist at the end. One of the lamest excuses ever by this lying wife and his brother. The tattoo does communicate strong desire on her part, but was it out of love or regret? If the latter, she will cheat again. If the former, then she would have never cheated in the first place.

Hooray for Mr. Mitchell.......let him hang in there to succeed with a divorce for adultery and a massive settlement with his brother for alienation of affection.
.....and Hooray for the author of this wonderful flash story.