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walking across the white

byMy Erotic Tale©
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by Anonymous

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by LeBroz12/11/05

~~

You just HAD to write this, didn't you;
Now I've got to head on out into this cold
And I'm cold before I get there!!

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by wildsweetone12/11/05

~

i like the sound of this:
'the first step slides
I realize
to be ice wise'

but this has me thinking:
'the body draws up
like a curled up kitten'
i'm thinking that a kitten draws it's body up after it gets up from being curled up. maybe, 'like a once curled up kitten' or something similar?

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by WickedEve12/14/05

dart

"embark on a short dart" I'm iffy about short dart.
I'd lose the curled up kitten.
Other than that, some good lines in this one.

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