You have a good story line going. There are alot of grammer errors, but that can be fixed with proof reading and editing. Please, don't be discouraged. The story is very good, and should have many more chapters. Please continue.
by
Anonymous03/06/06
Good story
Ignore the last two reviewers since they can't spell either. I'm looking forward to reading more of this story.
Just remember, you can't please all of the people all of the time. It's easy for the reader to forget that most of us who write for Lit are amateurs, we don't get paid for this. We do it because we enjoy it and we want to share what we write with others. Should you decide to write more, I would be more than happy to proof read for you. Constructive criticism is fine, but practical offers of help would have been more appropriate. You can find me in Lit chat, HP. Keep on writing!
by
Anonymous03/22/06
loving your aunti
i have an aunt very sexy and beautiful, thought of making it with her several times, never had the courage to bad bet it would have been super
Very erotic. With his sperm being shot into her womb like that, maybe they will accidently make a new cousin for him that might also be his son or daughter at the same time?
good story but watch your grammar you were getting his and her mixed up which ended up confusing me a couple of times.Good job otherwise keep it up ill be reading more of your submissions
by
Anonymous07/28/08
what crap
Wat a steaming illiterate disgusting piece of juvenile crap.
by
Anonymous07/28/08
what crap
Wat a steaming illiterate disgusting piece of juvenile crap.
by
Anonymous07/15/11
FIRST!
IM FUCKING FIRST!
by
Anonymous07/07/12
not bad
Im not the biggest fan off over sized cock stories to be perfectly honest but this was a good read but one little thing its HIS auntie not HER didn't even get that right once in the entire story spelling and grammer doesn't bother me much but come on if ur a "writer" make the effort please other than that not bad
The story had a great premise, but the grammatical errors were glaringly apparent. This story is a diamond in the rough that needs some polishing, that's all I'm going to say. Keep at it, don't give up.
English
Good Story Line
You have a good story line going. There are alot of grammer errors, but that can be fixed with proof reading and editing. Please, don't be discouraged. The story is very good, and should have many more chapters. Please continue.
Good story
Ignore the last two reviewers since they can't spell either. I'm looking forward to reading more of this story.
Proof Reading
Just remember, you can't please all of the people all of the time. It's easy for the reader to forget that most of us who write for Lit are amateurs, we don't get paid for this. We do it because we enjoy it and we want to share what we write with others. Should you decide to write more, I would be more than happy to proof read for you. Constructive criticism is fine, but practical offers of help would have been more appropriate. You can find me in Lit chat, HP. Keep on writing!
loving your aunti
i have an aunt very sexy and beautiful, thought of making it with her several times, never had the courage to bad bet it would have been super
Great reading!
Very erotic. With his sperm being shot into her womb like that, maybe they will accidently make a new cousin for him that might also be his son or daughter at the same time?
grammer issues
good story but watch your grammar you were getting his and her mixed up which ended up confusing me a couple of times.Good job otherwise keep it up ill be reading more of your submissions
what crap
Wat a steaming illiterate disgusting piece of juvenile crap.
what crap
Wat a steaming illiterate disgusting piece of juvenile crap.
FIRST!
IM FUCKING FIRST!
not bad
Im not the biggest fan off over sized cock stories to be perfectly honest but this was a good read but one little thing its HIS auntie not HER didn't even get that right once in the entire story spelling and grammer doesn't bother me much but come on if ur a "writer" make the effort please other than that not bad
It's a start
The story had a great premise, but the grammatical errors were glaringly apparent. This story is a diamond in the rough that needs some polishing, that's all I'm going to say. Keep at it, don't give up.
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission! or
Back to Vaseline Ch. 01 or
More submissions by huge_penis.