now here's a husband that truely knows the meaning of
" don't get mad, get even !!
lol
don
by
Anonymous03/25/06
2nd time I read You beginning to end
I liked this story; the sex is a rather small part of the over-all story, which is about, err, could we borrow one of the Russian greats' line, "Crime and Punishment"?? LOL
"I'm a patient man," the husband said. This guy is positively evil, but since he thinks he is pushed into that role by an even more evil person, someone he had previously trusted with his own life, his love!, he tells us, almost soothly, that it is okay,,, that he has no intention of doing physically violent things to either of those love birds but that he will exact very painful revenge.
I like the old adage "I don't get mad, I get even."
It would be hard for me to fuck the cheating bitch waiting for David to get out of jail. A better scenario would have been that some old boy with HIV had tapped old David's brown growler in the pen and gave him HIV+. Then he could have passed it on to Susie after he got out. As David started seeing Susan again, I would have conveniently quit fucking her. The day she was diagnosed as being HIV+, the insurance ran out because I had let her policy lapse.
FC
by
Anonymous03/25/06
I need an ending
I enjoyed but want the "Brenda penniless" and ruined end. Thanks for these words but please add part 2.
by
Anonymous03/25/06
An Excellent Fantasy!
Of course, I loved the just desserts meted out to David however, Brenda would have to be a very dumb person to not put two and two together. When they go to court all that evidence on the adultery will be totally discounted because he had sex with her over a year after her affair ended. If they divorce for other reasons then she gets 50% of the assets no matter how he tries to hide them.
Alt Ending: Husband lies low for 1 year and let them get together where he catches them (She is served divorce papers and David is arrested on a 3 strikes you are out law violation).
I have read all your stories and this one is one of the best. I find that you hardly ever finish a story and seem to leave the final ending up to the reader but this story could continue and I feel only you can do it justice. SleeplessinMD's point about the way a divorce would go should be considered if you do continue the story. I would truely like to read how he finishes his revenge and how he shows her fall from grace to family and friends.
Keep bringing great work. Your one of the best here.
Well done, JPB. Concise, clear, and quite realistic.
by
Anonymous03/25/06
Bullshit
Pathetic. Even for you. Go back to sleep. Your sick friends will say that it was a great read. Bullshit. They are wrong and are just sick motherfuckers. Like you.
In your world, is a husband who divorces his cheating wife a bigger fantasy than the one that licks other men's sperm from her hole? I wonder which kind of story gets the better votes?
Another story in the plus column I believe. Thank you.
Very well written story, ecxcept for one omission. You fail to answer the question asked at the beginning, WHY? Why did she do it? Was it some lack or action of his?
For the life of me, I can.t see why you even consider some or the whimp cream pie stories you write. wish you wouild lable them better, so I can skip them. This one does need an ending with the bitch really suffering. An all too late wake up call,or something.
Now you have to finish this one for us... Please! I always like the stories, where the victim can think rationally in such an emotional situation.
I love to read the comments as much as the stories. I see Anonymous in USofA is still at his/her...it's?, pathetic attempts to get attention. Anonymous has been very prolific lately, and I have laughed my ass off at his/her, "Please notice me...Someone acknowledge my lonely existence", type of cry for recognition. So, Anon, you have hereby been acknowledged today. Keep swearing...voting zero's and someone of us will mention you and the rest of us will keep laughing our posterior's off. (thanks for the entertainment Anon)
Thanks for the tale JPB
Gus
by
Anonymous03/26/06
ALMOST PERFECT
IF THIS STORY HAD SOME REALLY GOOD ASS KICKING, AND IF SHE HAD TO SUFFER MORE IT WOULD BE PERFECT.
by
Anonymous03/26/06
Mmm...
Well written, but... Especially in a short story the first sentence and/or paragraph should grab you—in other words--the hook. Your FIRST sentence says that when a spouse is unfaithful the strike is intellectual (ego), and then it goes to rage with insults (unfaithful whore, motherfucker). But what about sadness and pain? I didn’t get the hero’s full emotions. If there is still love (and there should be because love is not like a tap, you can turn on and off), those would be the first feelings to appear.
The first thing that struck me about this “Loving Wife” is that her husband is hurt, and while the poor pan drives himself to a clinic, she remains playing in the pool. Right...A loving wife? I don’t think so. Usually, I can buy your characters. With these ones, I didn’t. It was only another “revenge” story.
I love the revenge type stories, but I can’t help wondering if your heart is really in it, or are you trying to be responsive (commendable as it may be) to readers’ requests. The story is ok, but it feels like you ‘going through the motions’. In you typical “crème pie” stories (don’t misread it as an invitation to go back to that genre) you are inventive with your plots and characters, moreover, you have full contact with the cheating wife in the role of the humiliated husband. Not so here! I find it very telling that you take the revenge on the LOVER, yet the climactic element of this type of story – i.e. the confrontation and revenge on the wife, is left OUT OF IT. Makes you wonder: maybe you should practice more revenge stories to get ‘the hang of it’, or maybe you are not really “into it”.
ENJOYED STORY BUT WONDERED WHY YOU WERE OVERLY DECENT TO BRENDA , she had been fucking that bum 3 to 4 times a week, she deserved to get raped financially. thought you handled him fine but not cheating wife
by
Anonymous02/12/08
Too Short
The plot is good, but not erotic enough and the story is too short as if rushing for the finishing line.
by
Anonymous11/08/08
What's not to like?
Short, sweet, and well written. They don't all have to be 30k or longer and have one after another paragraph of graphic sex. Bravo. Dockwatcher
by
Anonymous11/18/08
her doubts
david's locked up and she's left with unanswered questions. a recording system to capture her words would be interesting, maybe even help the planning.
by
Anonymous01/21/09
anxious wife
she is just waiting for what will happen when HE causes, and her anxiety is up. her confession, i doubt it. i like the end her may have planned for her
by
Anonymous01/22/09
Difficult to swallow that a husband
can watch his wife have sex for 1 1/2 hours with another man and not loose his cool. This particular scene is used in many stories here. The husband then sneaks out of the house to gather evidence to proof his wives infidelity. Huh...
Since he is enjoying the extra good sex that his wife's infidelity created, maybe he should be sending the guy a thank you note. Most of your stories are good entertainment including this one.
He should ask her mother and dad if they are sluts like their daughter and if they fuck anyone they can like she does. His wife probably has been fucking around on him for the length of their marriage, and the one he caught her with is just the tip of the iceberg. Just kick the nasty whore out and get on with his life.
by
Anonymous08/05/09
Next Chapter
Final chapter. Her time on the dance floor and alone at the pool with him in Vale was certainly enough time and an atmosphere for him to seduce her, get her ripe and interested in cheating. Probably got her hornier than hell and with no opportunity, they connected back home. Still, if she hadn't cheated in all those years, why all of a sudden when hubby treats her right and they have plenty of sex? Something possibly missing here.
Anyway, lets have the next chapter showing her on the Internet shopping cheating wives, etc., confiding with a girlfriend, using her dildo and calling out her lovers name and then...end it with him taking her for a weeklong vacation (excuse) his/hers bags packed, doesn't tell her where they are going, she is excited, happy and then bewildered, confused and panicky as he arrives at the prison gates, walks her over to the gate, introduces her to a friend (process server), and as the lover walks out the gate (surprised - smiles at her) the process server hands the divorce papers to her along with a restraining order preventing her from ever calling hubby at home or work and not allowing her to be within 500 feet of her former residence. Hubby has all the internet files, temp, E-Mail, videos and phone taps. He really loved her, will miss her badly but not her wanton disrespect for him or the marriage!
Hubby and the process server leave the two lovers standing in the parking lot, him too damn young to know what to do or go and her, nervously crying, shaking, convulsing from anguish, nerves and ultimately collapsing on the ground...all of her strength and stamina drained from shock.
by
Anonymous10/04/09
christ how silly
Bob, you write ok, but you have absolutely NO understanding of basic human psychology... so your stories SUCK! stop wasting time. Don't you ever read the feedback... people don't want unrealistic scenarios... it is as silly as telling us that the wife had purple skin and the husband was 17 feet tall... it doesn't fly, it makes the story boring, and NO ONE likes it.
Put several grains of sugar in a half cup of gasoline and let is sit for a day and they will not disolve. I know because I tried it. Therefore, putting sugar in a gas tank would not harm the engine unless the sugar could be sucked into the combustion chamber and gravity and the filter would prevent that.
Put enough sugar and the gas tank would have to be cleaned but so would enough water or enough dirt and both are cheaper.
With computers, a quick inventory check would show the merchandise was not missing and likely there would be videos. Therefore, it is very doubtful that he would be fired. Therefore, David ends up with a gift valued at several hundred dollars.
JPB is correct by implying that the police have low IQs. However, they are not totally stupid. The police reports of the slashed tires and sugar in the gas tank that had to be cleaned out would be enough to show that someone has a grudge. Therefore, without some prior history of drug use and/or selling, it is unlikely that he would be charged.
The author should not make such stupid statments so I had to downgrade from 5 to 3 stars.
And there was certainly no need to debunk the results of hubby's revenge. This isn't Mythbusters or a documentary on National Geographic; it is story which shouldn't be taken seriously or to the literal extremes of DWornock's unrealistic standards.
only in reverse (Z-A). His writing always strikes me one way or the other. A few I have wanted to lobby 'FTDS - Finish the damn Story' to spin the ending, some I have to sit back and rework my own ending so I can go on. He continues to be, at least to me, one of the treasures of this site.
English
ok
one of your better efforts
Take no prisoners!
Damn! I didn't think that through.
Nice job, Bob! Good story.
DJ
Another good one.
This guy really did the right thing. Great ending too.Keep up the good work.
you have reinstated
your self as writer of beleivable enjoyable stories
good story
now here's a husband that truely knows the meaning of
" don't get mad, get even !!
lol
don
2nd time I read You beginning to end
I liked this story; the sex is a rather small part of the over-all story, which is about, err, could we borrow one of the Russian greats' line, "Crime and Punishment"?? LOL
"I'm a patient man," the husband said. This guy is positively evil, but since he thinks he is pushed into that role by an even more evil person, someone he had previously trusted with his own life, his love!, he tells us, almost soothly, that it is okay,,, that he has no intention of doing physically violent things to either of those love birds but that he will exact very painful revenge.
"I will leave her penniless," he said.
Good start. Don't disappoint me! lol
AS I said before...
...I either vote zero or a hundred.
Nice
Nice one JPB ,please let us all know how it works out.To quote Hannibal Smith 'I love it when a plan works.
Loved it
I like the old adage "I don't get mad, I get even."
It would be hard for me to fuck the cheating bitch waiting for David to get out of jail. A better scenario would have been that some old boy with HIV had tapped old David's brown growler in the pen and gave him HIV+. Then he could have passed it on to Susie after he got out. As David started seeing Susan again, I would have conveniently quit fucking her. The day she was diagnosed as being HIV+, the insurance ran out because I had let her policy lapse.
FC
I need an ending
I enjoyed but want the "Brenda penniless" and ruined end. Thanks for these words but please add part 2.
An Excellent Fantasy!
Of course, I loved the just desserts meted out to David however, Brenda would have to be a very dumb person to not put two and two together. When they go to court all that evidence on the adultery will be totally discounted because he had sex with her over a year after her affair ended. If they divorce for other reasons then she gets 50% of the assets no matter how he tries to hide them.
Alt Ending: Husband lies low for 1 year and let them get together where he catches them (She is served divorce papers and David is arrested on a 3 strikes you are out law violation).
This definitely one of your best stories. Thanks!
SleeplessinMD
My apologies
I meant Brenda when I wrote Susan.
FC
Another Great Story
I have read all your stories and this one is one of the best. I find that you hardly ever finish a story and seem to leave the final ending up to the reader but this story could continue and I feel only you can do it justice. SleeplessinMD's point about the way a divorce would go should be considered if you do continue the story. I would truely like to read how he finishes his revenge and how he shows her fall from grace to family and friends.
Keep bringing great work. Your one of the best here.
Really Liked It
Bob,
You amaze me. Some of your stories I hate and some I love. This one's a winner. Hope you do an ending for when she gets to divorce papers.
One of your best stories
Well done, JPB. Concise, clear, and quite realistic.
Bullshit
Pathetic. Even for you. Go back to sleep. Your sick friends will say that it was a great read. Bullshit. They are wrong and are just sick motherfuckers. Like you.
nice
A very good story bob.
Rake her over the coals
This is a great beginning but it does need an ending, Keep up the great stories
Wow, JPB, once again I have to wonder,
In your world, is a husband who divorces his cheating wife a bigger fantasy than the one that licks other men's sperm from her hole? I wonder which kind of story gets the better votes?
Another story in the plus column I believe. Thank you.
What's The Answer?
Very well written story, ecxcept for one omission. You fail to answer the question asked at the beginning, WHY? Why did she do it? Was it some lack or action of his?
AyWun
loved it
For the life of me, I can.t see why you even consider some or the whimp cream pie stories you write. wish you wouild lable them better, so I can skip them. This one does need an ending with the bitch really suffering. An all too late wake up call,or something.
Thanks...JPB
Now you have to finish this one for us... Please! I always like the stories, where the victim can think rationally in such an emotional situation.
I love to read the comments as much as the stories. I see Anonymous in USofA is still at his/her...it's?, pathetic attempts to get attention. Anonymous has been very prolific lately, and I have laughed my ass off at his/her, "Please notice me...Someone acknowledge my lonely existence", type of cry for recognition. So, Anon, you have hereby been acknowledged today. Keep swearing...voting zero's and someone of us will mention you and the rest of us will keep laughing our posterior's off. (thanks for the entertainment Anon)
Thanks for the tale JPB
Gus
ALMOST PERFECT
IF THIS STORY HAD SOME REALLY GOOD ASS KICKING, AND IF SHE HAD TO SUFFER MORE IT WOULD BE PERFECT.
Mmm...
Well written, but... Especially in a short story the first sentence and/or paragraph should grab you—in other words--the hook. Your FIRST sentence says that when a spouse is unfaithful the strike is intellectual (ego), and then it goes to rage with insults (unfaithful whore, motherfucker). But what about sadness and pain? I didn’t get the hero’s full emotions. If there is still love (and there should be because love is not like a tap, you can turn on and off), those would be the first feelings to appear.
The first thing that struck me about this “Loving Wife” is that her husband is hurt, and while the poor pan drives himself to a clinic, she remains playing in the pool. Right...A loving wife? I don’t think so. Usually, I can buy your characters. With these ones, I didn’t. It was only another “revenge” story.
I love revenge stories – does JPB ?
I love the revenge type stories, but I can’t help wondering if your heart is really in it, or are you trying to be responsive (commendable as it may be) to readers’ requests. The story is ok, but it feels like you ‘going through the motions’. In you typical “crème pie” stories (don’t misread it as an invitation to go back to that genre) you are inventive with your plots and characters, moreover, you have full contact with the cheating wife in the role of the humiliated husband. Not so here! I find it very telling that you take the revenge on the LOVER, yet the climactic element of this type of story – i.e. the confrontation and revenge on the wife, is left OUT OF IT. Makes you wonder: maybe you should practice more revenge stories to get ‘the hang of it’, or maybe you are not really “into it”.
Sickening
Your stories are normally very erotic. But this one clearly sucks. At least you could have had Brenda getting pregnant by you.....
Interesting
Good story so far. Interested in reading future chapters. Hope you submit them.
just punishment
The wife had it coming she tried to fuck the money out of her husband but he turned the tables on her and her lover.
Pat M.
Atlanta,Ga.
Great Story
Great story, JPB.
Love it
I really enjoy a patient spouse. When you get even, really get even, don't just get revenge.
BlBones
did a kid write this crap
read like 2yr.old wrote this story.
The answer to your question is "yes".
In answer to your question as to whether a 2-yr old wrote this story...the answer is YES!
Cheers!
BRENDA AND DAVID
ENJOYED STORY BUT WONDERED WHY YOU WERE OVERLY DECENT TO BRENDA , she had been fucking that bum 3 to 4 times a week, she deserved to get raped financially. thought you handled him fine but not cheating wife
Too Short
The plot is good, but not erotic enough and the story is too short as if rushing for the finishing line.
What's not to like?
Short, sweet, and well written. They don't all have to be 30k or longer and have one after another paragraph of graphic sex. Bravo. Dockwatcher
her doubts
david's locked up and she's left with unanswered questions. a recording system to capture her words would be interesting, maybe even help the planning.
anxious wife
she is just waiting for what will happen when HE causes, and her anxiety is up. her confession, i doubt it. i like the end her may have planned for her
Difficult to swallow that a husband
can watch his wife have sex for 1 1/2 hours with another man and not loose his cool. This particular scene is used in many stories here. The husband then sneaks out of the house to gather evidence to proof his wives infidelity. Huh...
Since he is enjoying the extra good sex that his wife's infidelity created, maybe he should be sending the guy a thank you note. Most of your stories are good entertainment including this one.
He should face facts, she is a slut
He should ask her mother and dad if they are sluts like their daughter and if they fuck anyone they can like she does. His wife probably has been fucking around on him for the length of their marriage, and the one he caught her with is just the tip of the iceberg. Just kick the nasty whore out and get on with his life.
Next Chapter
Final chapter. Her time on the dance floor and alone at the pool with him in Vale was certainly enough time and an atmosphere for him to seduce her, get her ripe and interested in cheating. Probably got her hornier than hell and with no opportunity, they connected back home. Still, if she hadn't cheated in all those years, why all of a sudden when hubby treats her right and they have plenty of sex? Something possibly missing here.
Anyway, lets have the next chapter showing her on the Internet shopping cheating wives, etc., confiding with a girlfriend, using her dildo and calling out her lovers name and then...end it with him taking her for a weeklong vacation (excuse) his/hers bags packed, doesn't tell her where they are going, she is excited, happy and then bewildered, confused and panicky as he arrives at the prison gates, walks her over to the gate, introduces her to a friend (process server), and as the lover walks out the gate (surprised - smiles at her) the process server hands the divorce papers to her along with a restraining order preventing her from ever calling hubby at home or work and not allowing her to be within 500 feet of her former residence. Hubby has all the internet files, temp, E-Mail, videos and phone taps. He really loved her, will miss her badly but not her wanton disrespect for him or the marriage!
Hubby and the process server leave the two lovers standing in the parking lot, him too damn young to know what to do or go and her, nervously crying, shaking, convulsing from anguish, nerves and ultimately collapsing on the ground...all of her strength and stamina drained from shock.
christ how silly
Bob, you write ok, but you have absolutely NO understanding of basic human psychology... so your stories SUCK! stop wasting time. Don't you ever read the feedback... people don't want unrealistic scenarios... it is as silly as telling us that the wife had purple skin and the husband was 17 feet tall... it doesn't fly, it makes the story boring, and NO ONE likes it.
Sugar does not disolve in gasoline.
Put several grains of sugar in a half cup of gasoline and let is sit for a day and they will not disolve. I know because I tried it. Therefore, putting sugar in a gas tank would not harm the engine unless the sugar could be sucked into the combustion chamber and gravity and the filter would prevent that.
Put enough sugar and the gas tank would have to be cleaned but so would enough water or enough dirt and both are cheaper.
With computers, a quick inventory check would show the merchandise was not missing and likely there would be videos. Therefore, it is very doubtful that he would be fired. Therefore, David ends up with a gift valued at several hundred dollars.
JPB is correct by implying that the police have low IQs. However, they are not totally stupid. The police reports of the slashed tires and sugar in the gas tank that had to be cleaned out would be enough to show that someone has a grudge. Therefore, without some prior history of drug use and/or selling, it is unlikely that he would be charged.
The author should not make such stupid statments so I had to downgrade from 5 to 3 stars.
LET US KNOW WHEN HIS SENTENCE IS UP
your idea sounds great. Dont forget to do it before she gets PG. TK U MLJ LV NV
Super
Wish I could have done that to my ex.
Nice
Brenda is getting off too easy, however.
BURN THE BITCH
HA
The story was plausible
And there was certainly no need to debunk the results of hubby's revenge. This isn't Mythbusters or a documentary on National Geographic; it is story which shouldn't be taken seriously or to the literal extremes of DWornock's unrealistic standards.
5 stars because it is a good piece of fiction...
I'm going thru JPB's stories
Alphabeticlly. For all the zircons there is the occasional gem like this one.
I'm doing the same thing
only in reverse (Z-A). His writing always strikes me one way or the other. A few I have wanted to lobby 'FTDS - Finish the damn Story' to spin the ending, some I have to sit back and rework my own ending so I can go on. He continues to be, at least to me, one of the treasures of this site.
Loved it
Wish it was more fully developed, especially at the end. Five stars. Sounds like he has a promising plan.
This is one reason...
...why JPB is the King of Twisted. The man KNOWS how to exact revenge in a way that leaves a lasting impression.
What else can I say?
Oh, yeah. 5 HUGE Stars!
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