You're off to a good start. I can't wait to see how the relationship between these two develops. Please write more soon.
by
Anonymous04/19/06
Good start
plz plzzzz dont leave it too long to write the next chapter, im dying here!! great beginning, cant wait to see where it leads
by
Anonymous04/19/06
Good Beginning to a good story
Cannt waite until you finish the next chapter.
by
Anonymous04/19/06
Great Start!
I hope to read more with these two! Don't forget about Tara though, I want to know what is going to happen with her.
by
Anonymous04/19/06
Love your work
Will you also finish Tara's Liason? Loved that, and this one is off to a really good start.
by
Anonymous04/19/06
Why You Keep Us Hanging?
I loved the story and was really getting into it and then---BAM! You left me hanging. How long must I wait to see what happened on the date? You know you are wrong for that!
by
Anonymous04/19/06
Avid reader
I love reading your work, look foward to reading it and I hope you continue your story lines:) A lot of people, especially me, really enjoy WM/BF stories (even if we don't post our appreciation much). The fact that you enjoy the same type of stories yourself shows in your writing. Again, great job!
by
Anonymous04/19/06
Great Start!
Great start, I think that this is going to be a good story.
Your stories are awesome! I look forward to reading each new chapter.
by
Anonymous06/12/06
You should consider writing for an e-publisher
Like ellora's cave or something. I've read A LOT of stuff on there that isn't half as good as your stuff. You should think about it, they pay you 37.5% of the cover price of your book!
Interesting to me, but seeing a comment coward..again
I'm thinking that the punk ass who keeps saying negative things about your stories is a serious hater with issues. It sounds like someone really jealous or
with their "nickers in a twist".
This isn't the forum for that passive aggressive b.s.
Why doesn't whoever the hell anonymous 12/10/11 is get over themselves?
Encourage NOT discourage!!!! Don't like the author or their style; then don't read their product.
by
Anonymous12/17/11
the feel of this story
reminds me of one of those British films in which nothing seems to be happening until the characters show how unconnected they are from each other and their world. I like it a lot -- five stars.
A great hook with a dream although all the writing books state that starting a story
with a dream is a no, no. However, in this case it works. The breakfast meeting with the fat guy was fun, especially his diet. The unexpected meeting at the bus stop was in keeping with Jolie's personality. David was a real cool dude and knew his effect on women. Her phone call was neat as she though she was doing it for a lark, but her dream won her over. Looking forward to chapter two.
English
good start
You're off to a good start. I can't wait to see how the relationship between these two develops. Please write more soon.
Good start
plz plzzzz dont leave it too long to write the next chapter, im dying here!! great beginning, cant wait to see where it leads
Good Beginning to a good story
Cannt waite until you finish the next chapter.
Great Start!
I hope to read more with these two! Don't forget about Tara though, I want to know what is going to happen with her.
Love your work
Will you also finish Tara's Liason? Loved that, and this one is off to a really good start.
Why You Keep Us Hanging?
I loved the story and was really getting into it and then---BAM! You left me hanging. How long must I wait to see what happened on the date? You know you are wrong for that!
Avid reader
I love reading your work, look foward to reading it and I hope you continue your story lines:) A lot of people, especially me, really enjoy WM/BF stories (even if we don't post our appreciation much). The fact that you enjoy the same type of stories yourself shows in your writing. Again, great job!
Great Start!
Great start, I think that this is going to be a good story.
lovely!
There should be more stories like this one...can't wait to read more!
I LOVE YOU!
I love you!
A fine start
Looking forward to the next chapter. Thank You. Ronnie W.
Great Work!!!
Your stories are awesome! I look forward to reading each new chapter.
You should consider writing for an e-publisher
Like ellora's cave or something. I've read A LOT of stuff on there that isn't half as good as your stuff. You should think about it, they pay you 37.5% of the cover price of your book!
there's smoke
so I know there's fire near...looking forward to the next chapter...Wild
Good Start
And they are off to the races...
this is story is
so stupid and unreal, but its entertaining so far. It's fiction so unreal is cool and sometimes I like a stupid story...
Interesting to me, but seeing a comment coward..again
I'm thinking that the punk ass who keeps saying negative things about your stories is a serious hater with issues. It sounds like someone really jealous or
with their "nickers in a twist".
This isn't the forum for that passive aggressive b.s.
Why doesn't whoever the hell anonymous 12/10/11 is get over themselves?
Encourage NOT discourage!!!! Don't like the author or their style; then don't read their product.
the feel of this story
reminds me of one of those British films in which nothing seems to be happening until the characters show how unconnected they are from each other and their world. I like it a lot -- five stars.
Hook
A great hook with a dream although all the writing books state that starting a story
with a dream is a no, no. However, in this case it works. The breakfast meeting with the fat guy was fun, especially his diet. The unexpected meeting at the bus stop was in keeping with Jolie's personality. David was a real cool dude and knew his effect on women. Her phone call was neat as she though she was doing it for a lark, but her dream won her over. Looking forward to chapter two.
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