by Goldeniangel
I love Greek mythology stories, especially those of gods having affairs with women, and sometimes men. I liked your story very much. I loved reading about Apollo and that wind deity Zephyr competing for the love of a handsome boy.
Too bad the boy died. Stories like these,classical, are simply eternal. Great work ! Great genre !!!
I think it's wonderful and like the reader before I do enjoy a bit of mythology mixed in with my smut *grin*
Where I think it actually fell down is that it could be a little longer and the terminology could be a little different. You're pulling your reader into this alternate myth where you suddenly throw twentieth century terms like pussy and cock at them and it upsets the vibe a bit. I'm not offended by the words themselves, I just think they didn't go with this story. The end with their more joyful and knowing union, which was the beautiful climax of the myth, could be built up a little bit more.
Otherwise it was very enticing. Your writing style is very strong and this isn't the first of your submissions that I've enjoyed.
x. Sadie
There are so many stories about more well-known myths... it's refreshing to see a new tack taken, and yours is nicely done. :)