All Comments on 'Three Ways to Avoid Heartache'

is: once.

36 years ago - and I still got him.

Too many times we allow raging hormones to control our thinking rather than looking at the situation and seeing the dealbreakers before they explode into drama. Nicely done. Good luck on the contest.

I agree it is important to ask questions - but the first date is not the time for long term plans. Get to know the person and ask about career pathing, hobbies more so then marriage ideas or children. From personal experience - guys will run fleeing if there is even a subtle hint of plotting the next 10 years out with them within the first 6 months. Of course there are some people that are happy talking about it because all they want is long term security - but it should really wait a month. However, an acceptable question within the first month 'what are you looking for in us?' - it is a good basis for a foundation and it lets you weed the short term players out of the equation.

It depends on the age group too. I date in the 25 - 35 age group and sometimes I can 'see' the clock ticking in the woman's head as she tells me about her plans over the next few years. (how do you react to a woman who says she wants kids in 2 years - this was the second date?!? - other then saying good night). To me it is all about being honest and not letting expectations take flight within the first 3 months. Just don't go into those talks with a 'plan' for the next 5 - 10 years or most will just walk away from that - unless they are saying to you 'at this point I want to think long term.'

What a gracious non-offensive intelligent way of getting to know Someone. As a Musician a line from a Broadway play kept going through my mind..."Getting to know you, getting to know all about you..." Bewindsor you are wise beyond your years. You have blessed us all with your Article.

duddle

Quite enjoyed reading your text, and I think you had some very good points, though I must say some of it seemed a bit rushed to me - I think at first it's important to find out where in life the other person is now, rather than their future plans - though this should already help you realize what they want later on...

Superb and to the point examples that will serve every age group out there. I have to agree with Anonymous from Canada that the advice was simple and may have left the impression of being a bit early with questions if too many are asked. Actually all the comments have been great.

You make I consider the best remark on first emotions. Be true to yourself.

EXCERPT:

The rush of emotion when we find some one interesting can often let ourselves feel that "It's not that big of a deal". WRONG!!! While your heart is going pitter-patter in the beginning it is "not that big of a deal", but you know as well as I do that somewhere down the road it will be a MAJOR deal!

Most people think that something’s will or can be changed as time goes on. Don’t ever fall into that trap, as years go by and you come to the realization you fooled yourself, now what.

Thank you for the tips we all need to remember

PT

gave you a 5 anyway.

you are so right... thank you for posting

My French wife-to-be

guided me to our cornerstones:

Sincerity & Complicity.

When We are bumping in a current discussion...

I Pause...

Until I can think of a less bumpy way to explore an idea.

It's working quite nicely. :+)))