by citizenseventeen
love both chapters! please write more! i love the character development making the whole story more rounded...(and very hot!)
Story development has improved from chapter one. However, still contains numerous grammatical errors.
Your character and story development are taking shape nicely. It's so refreshing to read a story where the emotion of love leads so naturally into the passion of making love. Keep it up!
nicely written, believable, funny and sweet. i cant wait for the next chapter.
It's nice when a story isn't just hard erotica but also has a normal human element.
This one was adorable, I especially like the bit where she smooshes his face and says "whose a smart boy." XD
Felt like a real recounting of young love but with plenty of sexy bits to satisfy too.
Both chapters were lovely, would love to see it continued. Keep writing. :)