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English
Pleasant..
A lovely story that meanders along erotically. One is struck by the main character's restraint in not forcing the object of his desire into rushing 'things.' A gently caring story. One would hope the Writer would continue this in a later episode.
Very realistic...
I would love to see you continue with this story line. I like the slow approach. To me its far more realistic and erotic than a quick romp in the hay.
Thinking mans seduction
Taking is a little slow and easy makes for a long term relationship with more depth.
Character approach is very good.
Look forward to the next episode.
Your story
Has been mentioned in the New Story Reviews thread on the Lit forum (Author's Hangout).
Very nice
I like the thought you put into this story, the pace is good so I hope you keep it going. A bit more character development as they get to know each other would help, I think that's where your going. Excellent first story.
Thanks
What Else?
These characters could be traded for anything or couple. There's absolutely nothing that holds our interest and makes us want to keep reading. The whole things seems poorly strung together, like maybe it made perfect sense in your head, but that never managed to make it to the page.
Total load of crap
Don't write anymore ass hole
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