by Gavionn
Start of good story but no money shot! All build up and no climax.
Good build up with logical reasoning, the gramma and punctuation is good too. Keep going with this!
Nice introduction. You planning on writing the main body of the story any time soon???
Ha, don't let 'em bother you. You caught me by surprise, ending it like that (I usually sneak down to see) but since you did, then please continue.
Good story. I like the build up. Do you think you'll put some anal in this story? What the hell I always say.
Keep it up!
Gavionn. I am sorry but I dont like half stories.Dont be offended its just how I feel.So I gave you half a score.I may miss the rest thus my time could have been wasted.But I will not hide.I will sign my REAL name. Be Well okdeacon
that was a good begining to a story. I do hope you continue with it.
Yeah that was so good I am going to stay horny for the 24hrs or more before part 2 is posted. If you believe that then I have a bridge to sell you. ** the quality of the writing is good but the content isn't there and won't give stars for later chapters that should be in the first chapter.