All Comments on 'Adult Disneyland'

by Gavionn

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  • 8 Comments
toJohnny7toJohnny7over 17 years ago
Had potential but fizzled!@

Start of good story but no money shot! All build up and no climax.

AnonymousAnonymousover 17 years ago
Great stuff

Good build up with logical reasoning, the gramma and punctuation is good too. Keep going with this!

AnonymousAnonymousover 17 years ago
Introduction

Nice introduction. You planning on writing the main body of the story any time soon???

AnonymousAnonymousover 17 years ago
No worries

Ha, don't let 'em bother you. You caught me by surprise, ending it like that (I usually sneak down to see) but since you did, then please continue.

AnonymousAnonymousover 17 years ago
Nice

Good story. I like the build up. Do you think you'll put some anal in this story? What the hell I always say.

Keep it up!

okdeaconokdeaconover 17 years ago
I Liked What I Read But.

Gavionn. I am sorry but I dont like half stories.Dont be offended its just how I feel.So I gave you half a score.I may miss the rest thus my time could have been wasted.But I will not hide.I will sign my REAL name. Be Well okdeacon

mom4usonmom4usonover 11 years ago
Nice begining

that was a good begining to a story. I do hope you continue with it.

live4thebjlive4thebjalmost 9 years ago
Yawn

Yeah that was so good I am going to stay horny for the 24hrs or more before part 2 is posted. If you believe that then I have a bridge to sell you. ** the quality of the writing is good but the content isn't there and won't give stars for later chapters that should be in the first chapter.

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