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Well, damn
That is one REALLY screwed up marriage. And all because she has that post partum something or other. She needed psychiatric treatment desperately but you can't force them, I guess. Too bad.
And it was a sad thing!
That was no kind of life to live ... why would she even want to stay with him?
Good story, Bob!
Regards, DJ
ok, but........
This was an ok start, but its begging for a part two, or even a part three. You got us interested, don't leave us hanging! Nice work.
Tim C.
I have Been there and done that
been there and done that.... my wife did NOT lose a baby but after the 2nd kind was born (they are now in the pre teens years 8 and 10 ) I went have been thru SEVERAL extremely long stretches with No sex no affection from my wiofe...
One time I went 17 months with no sex from her and when I complained about it she screamed at me.." if you wnat sex go find a whore..."
I dont drink I dont gamlbe I dont look at a lot of porn . I work from home and when the kids are sick I am always there so she doesnt have to be. I cook really well and we have great middle size house.
But a man can only take it so long. I have begged her to see a therapist and she has not.... " I make $70/k a year so I couldnt possbly have a problem..."
and she has been on 2 anti depressants in the last 5 years. But she goes off of them for some reason from time to time.
Thus I step out when I can. I would giove it up in a second if she would express even minor sxual interest in me... once or twice a month. But I cant stayed married with a woman who tells me to go find a whore and never saw then need to apologize of those awful remarks. ... I do so the kids and their stability.
Do the right thing
Get a fucking divorce!
Pathetic Situation
Postpartum depression is bad enough, but when it is coupled with the loss of the baby, bad things can happen. It amazes me when I hear about wives who just withdraw and don't try to get out of their pit of unhappiness. This is a well-drawn story, not quite the simple tales I'm used to in the BaS{H/W} series. I agree with another poster that a followup with the wife and husband communicating would be welcome. Good job.
Real sample of life in the world, just dramatized
The sad thing is there are too many people who will not go for any kind of therapy or even admission to a friend that there is a problem in their relationship. It is not an unusual reaction as some might think.
Most are afraid they will be blamed and made out to be a horrible person so they deny anything is wrong. It normally takes a trauma of some kind to make that person have to confront the problem. In some cases it is this confrontation of the infidelity that can actually save a marriage. I’d have to write a book to explain it, but it does happen many times. Sorry to say though most times it will end in to much hurt and memories to say it last a long time. Some do most cannot get over the pain and images.
This was a very good story to me. This happens by depression not being delt with or even acknowledge.
Thank you
PT
Harry is a dumb fuck
kind was born?
from my wiofe?
I went have been thru?
if you wnat sex?
I don't gamlbe?
I would giove it up?
even minor sxual interest in me?
cant stayed married?
never saw then need?
I do so the kids and their stability?
This one's for you, Harry
Harry, it's your life so do what you will.
That said, I cannot imagine remaining in a marriage with so little love between the partners. Other than your children, is there any reason to stay where you are? I admit that loving your kids is a powerful motivation but they're about to reach the age where they're going to start wondering why Mom and Dad aren't like other parents. What will you tell them when they ask?
As a product of a dysfunctional family, I believe they'll grow up better in an environment where truth and love are commonplace. I wish my childhood had been like that but it wasn't. It affected me when I grew to manhood and probably does still even today.
As a person who suffers from chronic depression, I can affirm what the pharmaceutical industry would just as soon you not know: anti-depressants slowly lose their effectiveness over time. The three medications I've taken all did (celexa, prozac and welbutrin). The "magic bullets" that the drug industry wants to sell us are no panaceas.
Your wife is in denial as I was. Therapy from a physiopsychologist helped me understand the bad wiring in my head and provided me with a set of lifestyle changes that have helped me deal with the condition. Mine is a classic case of low serotonin levels. I was a successful professional making a good salary until my boss killed himself from job-related stress. His suicide triggered my bout of chronic depression and it took me three years to stop denying that I was sick and start looking for help. In the interim, I lost my six-figure-a-year job, most of my friends and all of my self-respect.
I cannot emphasize too strongly the need for your wife to seek professional help. Denial is a powerful enemy because no one wants to think they're sick. I didn't. I've no doubt that I would've taken my own life had I not gotten help.
If she means anything to you, figure out someway, somehow to get her to a qualified professional. I state this from personal experience: if she's sick, then the day is coming when it will all come unwound. When that day comes, I think you won't want your children to see it. And if she's not sick, then you have a whole different set of problems to deal with but you have to start somewhere.
Best of luck to you.
To TLee
go fuck your self then send your mom over here.
I wrote my original post in a hurry without proof reading it... which was my fault.
It should of said this
===============
been there and done that.... my wife did NOT lose a baby but after the 2nd kid was born (they are now in the pre teens years of 8 and 10 I went thru SEVERAL extremely long stretches with No sex no affection from my wife...
In one interval I went 17 months with no sex from her and when I tried to talk to her about it she screamed at me.." if you wnat sex go find a whore..."
I dont drink... I dont gamble... I dont spend my free time looking at a lot of porn. I work from home and when the kids are sick I am always there so she doesnt have to be. I cook really well and we have great middle size house.
But a man can only take it so long. I have begged her to see a therapist and she has not.... to quote my wife "I make $70/k a year so I couldnt possbly have a problem..."
She has been on 2 anti depressants in the last 5 years. But she goes off of them for some reason from time to time.
Thus I step out when I can. I would give it up in a second if she would express even minor sexual interest in me... something like once or twice a month. But I cant stayed married with a woman who tells me to go find a whore and never sees a need to apologize of those awful remarks. ... I do so the kids and their stability.
TO ALVARON
One of the reasons I stick around is b/c I know there is decent person in there -- my wife -- somewhere trying to come out.
I have a moral/ ehtical issue leaving someone when I promised to take care of them in sickness and in health. Of course if she ever recovers and still doesnt wnat me... I am soooo gone. But right now I dont what the truth is...
I dont know how much of her lack of sexual interest is simply based on the fact that she doesnt want me Or is based on her depression. As Long as she doesnt cheat on me... I will stay.
flat line
the honesty of husband was there, just sort of pathertic the marriage deteriorated to that point. flat lined perhaps, for good, absent interest of linda.
one comment is probably correct, divorce.
Best one I think.
As someone said...a bit dramatic! But it does outline severely what seems to happen for one reason or another. My wife lost inerest in sex after the first few years and no matter what I did to sex it up failed. She never turned me down but she would basically just lie there after the first child was born. We grew apart only as far as the sexual intimacy was concerned, and I have been mentally distraught for years. We are a loving couple in all other ways but sexually. I have communicated my concerns continually over the years and I can tell it bothers her, but she cannot and does not really explain the whys of her lack of interest. She even tried hormone pills but it messed up her cycle something awful and she gave it up. I could not bring myself to cheat in any way over the years and so have had to utilize porn and now literotica stories for sexual stimulus. Oh, I can still get it when I want, but like I said there is no response from her to encourage me in any way... Oh well, I have read your stories and can see the many situations that can cause a man to cheat. I wish now that maybe I had done so over the years to force the issue. However, I spent all of my money and time for and with my family instead...of women. I tried a few times here lately to find another woman but after 28 years with one woman I love... Besides, the women all know that I am married and that I have an extremely attractive wife. I am not young enough to be marriage material or a sexy stud anymore. And I just can't let her go because I want to have a companion to grow older with. She is a delight in all other ways. Maybe this is another story plot? No? I guess not because I haven't or will not cheat on her just for sex...
Almost there
But the last 3 lines were like a bucket of cold water.
Sorry but reality sucks.
He could get a divorce and wear the ring. After a few years I would like that it would wear thin, great sex no life, no partner.
IF YOUR PARTNER MOVES ON
it should be further that a wall away. TK U MLJ LV NV
Good Read***
A little flat at the end! Thanks for sharing.
so why stay ?
Some may argue that he committed to her in sickness and health.
But what she did is considered a form of abandonment, in those states that allow divorce for cause it is a legal cause.
If she had packed up and left him would you say he owed it to her to stay married?
An interesting take on the coward's way to a divorce
It seems to me that they both know their marriage is over. Rather than trash each other, why not just have a little talk, agree the marriage is over and file for an amicable divorce? He's simply waiting around for her to find out and file for divorce. Maybe he wants to save the filing fees and the expense of her attorney? He would have been better off agreeing to a divorce with her, use one attorney, file together and still save a bunch. Or maybe she doesn't want a divorce? I guess that's a possibility. Figure out your own ending. Bob ain't talking.
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