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English
Interesting
I really hope you will continue this one. I would like to find out if it was all just a con job or what else happened.
Bittersweet!
Man looking at his empty house for the last time remembering a lost love and engaging in bittersweet memories.
It seems like every writer does!
I thought that perhaps only "Loving Wives" writers left their stories unfinished, but it seems as though some "Romance" writers do the same thing. I don't know...perhaps its in the water that Lit.com writers drink.
Cheers!
Thanks for your comments
I appreciate the feedback. Just so as to remove any doubt, the story *is* finished. The reader is not supposed to know what happened because the *character* doesn't know what happened. There are clues within the story that explain what truly happened, but the character is left to figure it out on his own, as is the reader.
Sincerity?
Sounds to me like your girl didnt believe in your sincerity & cut her losses.
Tough luck mate.
Dark .......
Not sure how to rate this. It has the beginnings of a very dark story. Continue if you can.
Incredibly powerful story
It really moved me.
But it was a direction in which I didn't want to be moved. I voted it a 5 for the intensity, but I think I wish I hadn't read it.
Another one I love!!
I love your style, how you take us in a emotional journey with him.
Thank you, your work inspires me. :)
Great half story ...
But, without the rest of the ending, we cannot guess the other half. More to the point, we can 'assume' any ending we like, without any idea what you meant. Sort of like you painted the left side of a portrait, and left the other side blank. Note that this is not the same as painting the whole portrait, and making the viewer wonder what happened before and after and who and such.
Perhaps, in your wisdom, you could paint what he did to start finding out what was going on, where she went, and why she needed to take all his personal possessions? It only needs a 1-pager, then we, your readers, can complete our own imaginations. Maybe then, we can write a conclusion in out own minds ...
Sorry, 3 stars
Not sure where you went wrong on this story. Not even sure where you were trying to go in the first place.
The supposed clues, I went back and scanned the story again looking for any clues, didn't even give me enough to suspect an ending, much less project one for myself. The only 'clue' that jumped out was her reaction to him going out of town and not trusting him to pick her up, but turned out that she wanted to rob him while he was gone.
So much missing from this story, like was that the first opportunity that he gave her to take all his stuff? She was with him long enough to get financial info on him, did she wipe out his bank acct also?
I suspect this story was the result of an omniscient author thinking he had provided clues that were either edited out or never left the authors mind to make it to the page. Thats why editors/proof readers are so critical.
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