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Quickie On The Road

byCarnevil9©
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Comments (4)
by Anonymous

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by csmsmith01/16/07

Language and style

Your choice of language and the narrative style worked well. I enjoyed it very much.

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by Anonymous01/17/07

Awful!

Any story that uses the term "slimy man-milk" sucks!!!!!!!!

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by SlickTony01/18/07

Eh--

Not a bad read; the description of the power couple was spot-on, the pacing was good, the action lively. However, the word "brittle" was used too many times, and it's TAUT when you're describing asses or something else that's taut, NOT taught! If I had a dollar for every time I've seen this particular error I could retire.

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by cdonchuknow101/25/07

Good Story

Enjoyed your story. Since I am a traveling salesmen and spend quite a bit of time on the road and in airports I could easily relate to the benefits of people watching.

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