All Comments on 'A New and Delicate Balance Ch. 08'

I hadnt really thought of the baby. What woman who is pregnant doesnt think of the baby. Either good ro bad, the constantly think about it. You protray this bitch as totally wrapped up in herself. Where is that love she is supposed to have for the man? Why is Phil still alive? Can Eric ever grow up and become a man?

Writing excellent. Actions of the characters, not believable, especially not Eric's. How would Eric know what airline to search, what flight number, where to find Irene? Airports (especially New York airports) are big places with tens of thousands of people. Irene is supposed to be intelligent, caring (except for fucking her best friend's husband and cuckolding her own), wise in the ways of the world; how can she not understand that it matters to her husband if the child is Phil's or Eric's? The only explanation is that she is sub-consciously pleased she went and cuckolded her husband and secretly hopes the child is Phil's! And Eric, why does he even bother any more? He rejected the phone calls, rejected the e-mails, but now suddenly he wants to talk to Irene and "hear her side" even though "she will probably lie again?" This too is not credible. He has no evidence with which to go to a divorce lawyer, and now he can't obtain any (he pitched Phil's letter). So he will get screwed by the divorce far worse than Irene. He may even have to pay child support for a child probably not his own, and he will not get to visit because he won't be able to afford to travel 3000 miles to Los Angeles to see his child (and it will be too painful going there and facing Irene again and again). Eric really can't face his problems nor can he do anything. Again, he is the helpless "woman" who was abused; he asks Irene to leave the apartment (just as the woman whose husband cheats would expect). Irene does this without argument! The author has a tough time in store for her to wrap this story up while retaining at least some element(s) of logic. I hope she can do this. I would also like to feel more than just pity for Eric . . .

It occurs to me that there's a big plot hole in the story. Why didn't Irene take the morning after pill after she had sex with Phil? It's effective and safe, at least according to Planned Parenthood. So I have to assume that Irene wanted to bear Phil's child and that makes everything she says about salvaging her marriage to Eric a lie.

<P>

The writing is good but not good enough to overcome this plot hole. Here's a 50 for your efforts and I thank you.

The other readers just aren't getting this story. They are so wrapped up in what is and what isn't real.

This story is very POWERFUL, from all aspects, I like the short paragraphs, the 'to the point' statements. The questions, the unfulfilled questions even!!!

I think you write a very very good story, and I think that as imperfect as it is that, yes, it can be real.

When people are in pain they don't always think rationally, just like in your story.

They are soooo much in love with each other, that I hope forgiveness will work it's way through all the fog and pain, people make mistakes, I hope the child is ERIC'S so badly. Thats what maybe saves them in the end.

Guess we will have to keep reading this fine story that you are so promptly putting up for us.

Pull it together Eric, for Irene and your baby!!!

Thank you!!!!!

It takes more than words to be powerful. There has to be a dynamic flow, people you can relate too, a circumstance of life that has the possibility of reality.

This mess is disrespecting & cuckolding a caring man [twice] for no other reason except to demean him plus diminish his stature and self respect, some really weird friends(?) who fuck others and themselves up - down and sideways and are proud of it, and a loving wife who selfishly does what she wants in the name of love - for herself. All this in the lady writers prose and purpose for balance??? How stupid do you think 99% of the readers are writer?

This is an ongoing waste of your talent in a farcical humiliating cucking of a weak wimp and the absurd characters of your choice who are beyond belief and human redemption.

Really sad twisted contortions in pretty flowing words.

If this was about people: living, struggling, thinking, making mistakes, learning, correcting them - then we would have seen an inevitable development as life brings it over real people. But since this writer’s thinking is not along these lines, no wonder such prosaic mundane things, like how could a presumably loving wife peruse the preservation of her marriage, never occurred to her. The same applies to the first Anon and to Vulcan’s comments. It is indeed very relevant that Eric would wonder if the baby is his. Not so in the land of the disconnect. What a concrete and non poetic question he suddenly lands on her! It never crossed her mind. I believe that the birds outside my window are more thoughtful than this character. Delicate balance indeed.

And a point for thought to Vulcan. Is not there a point where we connect the dots between the content and the style? Can there truly be a beautiful style which conveys dull content? Isn’t there a point where the dissatisfaction from the content leaks into our impression from the form? Here is my theory: When a beauty speaks, and her words are wisdom and wit, she seems doubly beautiful. Yet if the same starts talking and instead all that I hear is sham and dull, her beauty in my eyes is gone!

I don't paticularly like this story, but I feel sorry for Ilene in this story and I feel sorry for the author after reading some of the vicious crude insults from largely anon readers whose vocabularies seem to be limited to four letter words.I don't like some of the stories I read ,but why unleash all these vitiolic attacks on the author simply because you don't like her story,My apologies to the author as an anon who is embarassed by my anon associates and the crude insulting language they use.

60 year old George

She shoulda hooked up with Phil, they deserve each other! I'm on "nins & peedles" hoping Eric don't wimp out. Anxiously awaiting next installment, hope it's not another detour chapter.

Apparently, the editors here at LE have something invested in this story. It surely doesn't deserve any particular notice, but they keep applauding it. To me, the story line is wandering around more than a drunken sailor. Why is such loose craftsmanship being identified as being above the average? Strange.

i have nothing to do about your personal life,that your business and not others.comments come from all walk of life and some people are smarter than others.there fantasies and there real life and this story is out there.most men would've done something to phil in revenge or justice.irene was a pawn and got caught up and the whore came out of her.there no man like eric out there and you're missing the point the commentors are trying to show you.

It isn't only that you have killed the story by dragging it on, but it's the technique you used that finally nailed the coffin. There are ways that a skillful author can give multiple POV's. But yours didn't work. Enough is enough. You started this story well, you don't have to make each SHORT chapter a different POV to keep us interested. Just use 3rd person POV and move it. Shame on you, author.

Its funny to read the comments. People do commit mistakes and then they are sorry for it also. As Jesus said...The one did not commit a sin will pick up the stone first....! But we are all sinners..(if you believe in absolute righteousness and if absolute righteousness is anything at all)This is just a story chaps...And readers are wishing that the damn plane should crash! My goodness! The person who commented like this seems to be in more pain than the "Eric" who atleast came to airport to see her off! Come on guys..show some maturity, please. If you do not want to read such stories why do you wander here! If the writer is sick and the readers are sick, please do not come here, as this disease is deadly contagious!

<p>On one hand the story started off good and for a few chapters it was a good read. I felt bad for the husband, you did a good job of showing how he was hurt, confused, depressed, and basically lost when his first wife decided to just play him like a violin. And when you had her find some guys to give him a beating as a going way present, because he refused to allow her to cheat on him with the full knowledge she was doing it, that really just made her the last likeable female ever written about.</p>

<p>But then you let his new wife do it, and then everyone had to start having a say in how they felt about matter. That started to seem weird. Not because you did it, but because most of those people telling their stories could have done so in just one chapter or the max two chapters, but 4? It started to make it seem like they weren't quite as developed as they may have needed to be. I mean in chapter one you had him find out about the wife, but in chapter two you introduced a lot of knowledge about him <i>knowing</i> about her cheating, and confrounting her with it, but no where did you ever show where he found out. But with the 3 of them who abused him so badly during his second marriage you kinda took 4 chapters to show how messed up they were, but that seemed to be more evidence than was required in thier case.</p>

<p>And I <i>totally and completely</i> disagree with the Anon guy from India, if you’re going to quote something you need to quote the context in which it was given, not try to apply it to random situations. If you disagree with me, read the passage about he said when was asked "directly" about divorces.</p>

<p>But I digress. I agree that folks can be sorry about what they have done, and if they truly are, then they could/should be forgiven. But thats only half the problem. The rest of the problem is what does the person who screwed up do to "redeem" themself (or yourself) after you screw up. Does that person even try? Do they just pretend it never happened? Do they sit and wait for forgiveness while trying to make the other person feel bad for not just granting them instant forgiveness? Do you sit and do nothing? That's what both women in his life had been doing. They screwed up, and then waited for him to come back to him after they did so. To me that doesn't warrant anything more than forgiveness and human courtesy. To me, that is where you’re nice to the person and treat them civilly, but that doesn't mean you can't still divorce them. And God knows it doesn't mean if your really hurt by what they did you pretend it never happened. But to me it mean you don't let this rule your life forever and you find a balance you can live with.</p>

<p>I liked where you let him find someone else and find out his life wasn't bound to his first wife and her ways, but then to throw him in a second time in the tank and let him drown just seems kind of mean. And while you really built up sympathy with the husband, it kind of appeared to me that you were building up sympathy with Irene making it seem that she was a partial victim of circumstance instead of a two hour willing participant who developed a case of the <i>Oh no's</i> after all the sex was over.</p>

<p>The only question most of us may have is "whose baby is it". Not that it matters at this point. It will always be half hers. But will it be a part of her husband, who she said was always the love her of life who treated her so well or the man who in a moment of lust betrayed her husband to for those two hours of pleasure where she never gave her husband one thought till it was long over?</p>

-Risq

... more and more. Especially every characters reflections. Maybe there are holes in the plot, but I'll get many suggestions for my own writing. I am sorry about most readers of english Lit can't read my stories. ;-) /

"Weiter so", respective I need more stimuli or suggestions/

Many greetings from germany/

Nucleus

Great story.. don'r rush it and finish the tale.. will both wives meet in California... maybe the Irene will be as big a slut as his first wife..

anyway.. it is well written and really explores the emotion.. Great work!!!

are you allways so selfish ? playing games in real life, writing fictional stories and being selfish there again.how come ? you just bored all the time so you have to have your daily little drama, the kick that at least something is happening even if it is nothing good ? being the offender and turn around the word (question about the baby)and then act like victim, so that the real victim does not understand anything at all? and what has that to do with erotic literature ? the only erotic thing in your profile is the picture you added to your profile and therefore everybody should be warned near you: as cold as ice and selfish without scruple!

still not enjoying it as much as the first two, but atleast it is getting back on track.

this series started w/ such promise; Eric was well-developed as a character, & when he found Irene, I thought yes, there is his possible redemption. Instead, you have turned him into some of conflicted, nervous, bi-polar wimp, who improbably shows up at the airport, at the very last minute, to ask questions that he believes she will lie about in any event. And then you have Irene not even care who the father of the baby is, how does that speak to her character, how unbelievable.

I wrote a comment on your first installement of this series when you posted it on another site, & complimented you. The ONLY THING I asked was that you not turn Eric into some sort of "ballless" wimpy wonder like you've done in at least one other of your stories. I guess your apparent sexual orientation or proclivity won't allow that to happen, so poor Eric gets fucked over & then fucked up. Well, I'm finished wasting my time on this series. What a waste. From now on, when I see your name, that will be my clue to move right on, like maybe JPB, who at least sometimes gives his male characters some brass balls.

Now we have Eric, the Super Wimp, show up at the last minute to meet with Irene to ask her questions he should have asked during their last meeting.--------------------

Is he going to be a father? Regardless of the divorce this is a big deal for any man. So she leaves and this big issue is left hanging (Is he going to support the child if it is his? What kind of relationship is he going to have with his child?)---------------------------------------------------

At first you built Irene into this victim (of Phil's) who just slipped. Now we know that Irene had flirted and teased Phil effectively dangling a prize for years in front of him. Irene acted like a moth (even before marrying Eric) who flew closer and closer to the flame. Irene actually betrayed Eric and Mary when she continued this pattern of behavior with Phil.------------------------------------------------

One serious disconnect between Irene's professed love for Eric and her actions is the fact that she never gave a thought of Eric during her fuck with Phil. People who have the level of intimacy she described would have some presence of their loved one during this encounter (that is how they resist these temptations in the first place). I am talking about her description that Eric is th elove of her life. So Irene is just lying to herself about how much she loved Eric. That is the reason that she only felt real regret was when she was caught.------------------------------------

Another point: Both Elaine and Irene cheated on Eric. Elaine was a "hard" cheater who overtly acted to satisfy herself. Irene was a "soft" cheater who tried to hide her true motivations while doing the same thing as Eliane. Neither one deserves any sympathy.

Bottom Line: It is good that Eric and Irene go on with

their separate lives.------------------------------------------

SleeplessinMD

This story started off as a reasonably good cheating story. As the chapters have gone on, it has progressively gotten much worse. It is now so BAD that I can barely skim it. I keep hoping it will get better, but so far no joy.

The author writes well enough from a prose & grammar standpoint but the obvious plot line holes & other issues really is distracting.

The story and all its aspects are good and entertaining. How come I never read one of your stories?? Because you cannot??!

Like watching a train wreck

Both sluts are in LA.

One preggers.

The other still a slut.

Eric.

NOW WHAT?

There is pain everywhere in this story. It depresses me, wounds me as I put myself in Eric's place, wounds me as I try on Irene's place. I am totally involved here, Sophie. Nicely done.

I don't like cheating stories. I don't like cheating wives and I don't like cheating husbands. Yes, I should have looked at the Loving Wives label but I didn't.

I like this story. It flows. It has interesting and flawed characters. It has unexpected twists. I hurt for Eric. I hurt for Irene. I hurt for Mary. Despite my hatred for what the character Phil is, I can enjoy a story in which he has a role. Thanks for sharing your writing.

So I hope Eric gets his head out of his ass and moves on, but that is easy for me to say not living his pain/betrayal rejection. The Elaine character was a hollow skunt without redeeming value to this planet or its people. This second woman is much scarier, as she is harder to spot and could go undetected for a while and really mess you up. And after her indifference to his query about Paternity, she has exceeded my ability to understand and absolve others for their human failings. For her, like Elaine some BTB is what I want to see. Good writing, I just doubt the ending is going to be to my taste :-) Thanks for writing it.

First. Congrats. Four out of four. A very well written chapter. Powerful emotions. But you are killing me with these characters. Just talk to each other. Just listen to each other. Just say what you are really feeling. I swear the author is trying to kill me. Must read the next chapter now.

great thoughts to consider:

"Tell me, which is the greater betrayal, the fucking or the denial?"

Then again,

"But I am not a good bastard, am I? I guess I'd love to be, but I lack the talent and the guts. I can't live with it and go on. In the end I make quite a sorry bastard."

You continue to do an excellent job of distinguishing these woman. She screwed up, but she is a good woman at her core.

It seems many people like sopa opera, but it goes beyond reality.

I started it and painfully I also have to finish it. Damn you for deleting those spoilers in the comments of chapter 1.

This chapter would make a staunch optimist reach for anti depressants.

we're back to damn good.

After reading several stories by this author I can see it's a constant none-too-subtle recycling of stock characters: The weak husband, the "rich alpha male", the slutty, submissive wife who has no self control, and the "friend" who is her enabler.

I don't think it is better at all. Still a depressing anti male epic.

so many of my favorite writers on this site have angiquesophie as a favorite. read her stories they said, you'll like them they said. well. i'll finish this one because now i am committed to seeing it through but shit. angiquesophie or a fork in the eye? 6 of one, half dozen of the other.

This ending, altough I am losing myself in all of them. I am excited to see where this is going.

about three years ago, I did not score this chapter. I don't know if I gave up on it or what. It is like chalk on a blackboard, like the sound a dentist drill makes heard though the bone structure of your jaw...

As I waded through it this time I found an inadequacy in Literotica's scoring scheme. From "hate" to "love." There should be another category for story "quality." But then that would strip away the balm for the author. After all, the author could assuage their feelings by believing the reader could "hate" the "story" but admire the quality.

Kind of like this chapter!

Eric should have his tear ducts cauterized. He's still crying over his second bad choice. And he'll never know whether the kid is his or not - at least not from this lying ex.

I remember the ending now. There should be a nice little twist at the end.

I'm literally reading to see if Eric will find a way to turn his life around and learn from these experiences. Hopefully he wont loose himself in another relationship without addressing some fundamental issues.

My comment from about a year ago reflects my feelings once more. The first time I read this Ch, I did not score it. The second time I gave this chapter a 3. The three is a compromise score since it a well told chapter to a lame story.

This story keeps going down hill, started well but has become such a terrible tangle of perspectives. Rather difficult to care about anyone, no desire to care about the sluts.

Why should he care if the baby is his. He will never be involved with, or her. He also needs to leave NY and see a psychiatrist.