Sexy

Good

but could be better

I'm not fond of its rhyme and I think it constricts the language.

The alliteration in the poem is distracting and that should be reworked, imho.

Mentioned in today's new poem reviews

Geez

Geez, here is a poem I hope I never receive from my daughter.

I picture a prostitute and the reason why she is like that is because of the lack of attention, affection or the abuse that she received from her father.

All of your powers are so powerful.

Seeing the Invisibles

I agree with vampiredust on some of the technical problems. BTW, thank you for helping in the efforts to turn the public comments board into a living substance like the rest of the sections in Literotica by posting substantial comments not just courtesy comments as most other posters on the poems section do). ***
Despite it, the poem got me engaged as almost any poem which pays attention to themes other than ‘me- me- and- me- again- in- the- context- of- me’. So hats of for opening your eyes to your surrounding while you were walking or driving. But, as my fellow Americans like to say: “having said that”, I felt somewhat uncomfortable even as you were trying to understand and be empathetic with the woman. How do you know as much? How about getting off your path to find a way to talk with her in a non patronizing way. I find the very challenge very difficult. How do we really go about it? Ask her how can we help? What brought her here? Pretend we are lost? Buy her time and talk? Every option sounds worse than the other. It means that you touched on a real social ill, namely, the terrible isolation which plagues the invisible people among us. When I came to the US, I was shocked when I noticed the ‘non interaction’ between ‘the invisible’: homeless; hookers mentally ill; alien workers and “the rest”. Now I am almost as bad. Speaking of invisibility, vampiredust, I was confused by your statement that the alienation in the poem was distracting and should be reworked. I was wondering, if you take the alienation out of the poem what will be left?

Response to Another Commentator

Eons ago you commented on my poem, and I don't know that I ever responded, and wanted to do so now. The poem was not written with a hooker in mind, although that is a legitimate reading of it. What I was thinking of was a very specific evening in my life when I tried to wear what was supposed to make me sexy and that poem was written to try and capture my feelings that evening. It is more a tribute to the girls in middle school and high school trying to deal with sexuality than it is to prostitution. There was no condescension, it was a much more personal poem than that =).

Beauty is on the inside no matter who you are and you don't need any body to tell you that you are pretty, don't let any body tell other wise or don't you for get it.