All Comments on 'Abed'

he needs to grow some balls or look in her purse for his

It shows how much some of these people even pay attention to some of these stories. The wimp as you call it is the bed speaking not some man. I truly enjoyed this small tale. I just wonder if this was a feather bed as it sounded so comfortable.

Not the story. It was well written and I enjoyed reading it. What was hysterical was the knee-jerk reaction of the commenters. They're so ready to trash any "Loving Wives" story that doesn't include punishment or humiliation of the woman portrayed, they can't even read the title or read to the end of the story. Very well done. And there will be more to follow, because they won't see the comments until they're done spewing, either.

<p>I heard of a guy one time who claimed he could read something like 10,000 words per minute. Some reporter tested him by giving him a book to read that he had never read. The guy paged through the entire book in about a minute, then answered questions about the plot. Needless to say, he didn't have a clue.</p>

<p>The Loving Wives Nazis don't have the intelligence or the patience to actually read these stories. My theory is they base their entire opinion of the story on the first (and sometimes) the last paragraphs. Some of the statements that they write in their comments are so bizarre that they are actually more interesting than the story in question. Humor, plot twists, characterization, entirely escape these maroons.</p>

<p>MungoParkIII has cleverly tossed out a line and waited while the LW Nazis took the bait. Their gleeful indignity at the story merely shows their incredible ignorance or lack of reading skills. </p>

<p>Way to go, Mungo. Perhaps you have put a few of these fools in their place. Perhaps they will actually read the next story before commenting.</p>

Very witty ..! Brilliant...! A speed trap for the no brainers in here...and how many got caught..! Got to be the most clever story we have seen on here..

The story is different. It seems a misnomer in this category except maybe it is a lesbian marriage.

is not worth shit. Yep fun reading for some with no brains and you have a few of them giving you hurrahs. Personally I think your fantasy story reeks and is best published in a magazine like Cosmopolitan. Yeah, jerks, I read it and understood it and still dont like it. But then I have and education and brains.

Adjective, Archaic, old English:

Description: in bed.

Well, so my dictionary tells me! I liked your story and found it quite novel.

Novel:

Adjective:

Description: Of a new kind or nature

My best regards

Nice title. It got me interested in reading it, but I hated the characters, both him and her. Nothing to like. The longer I read the more depressing it became. However I liked your use of language and grammer!

I didn’t understand your comment, there were 2 of 4 bad reviews, and you saw a 'nazi' attack. Wasn’t it a little to early?

Very clever, and very well written. I didn't get it at first, and I thought some of your analogies were a bit strange. I had a hard time understanding the POV of the narrator until the light blinked on , then I actually laughed out loud. How would a bed feel about a promiscuous girl?

I think the sadness and disappointment is well done. It also shows just how empty that lifestyle can me. I know that some who "didn't get it" would like to change their votes.

I think you threw people off by the category. I've never felt I was married to a bed, but I never asked the bed.

we were misled by this being in the loving wives section, i was like everyone else thinking it was a man, i went back and reread the story and then i could tell it was abed doing the talking. i see so much in the comments bout people being dumb and stupid, not being able to sort this out. there were only one dumb comment and everyone gets at least one on their stories, even DG Hear, who i think is the best author in literotica.

Loved it!

And it is not in the wrong category if the author was trying to through of the readers. Which seem to be a success on his part :)

The quote was supposed to give us a clue.

I thought this story was a clever idea and it would have gotten a higher rating if it weren't for the cheap trick of placing it in the wrong category.

Some of the descriptive language turned me off (ugh) like the sweaty balls and the hot STINK of cum...and that's not counting the guy with the small dick who tried to fuck her ear...ugh again. But then again, my bed doesn't love me...it seems.

Very good writing with some nice images. True, it is hard to categorize. "Loving Wives" is the only category that I read in Literotica because it is there that one finds, or hopes to find, character development along with deep, serious, devasting emotions. Cleverness, though worth cultivating, was a little off-putting in this case.

it sad people don't know what love is.if someone love you they don't share themselves with others in your bed.each lover she has takes away from you and her love.so the bullshit the writer is writing is crap.she disrespect you everytime she fucks another man,while with you.ask your father or brother.when wimpy or halfass men write shit like this i laugh,because they want us to go along with this sissyboy crap.what kind of man let this shit go down with his women in his house.the male lead in this story make me puke.

He should dump her for she has no respect for him just her lover why does he keep her around so she can give him seconds she is cockolding him for her amusement he should dump her for someone that will show him some respect than being shit on by her

Pat

another husband who is very insecure. a pet is treated w/ more dignity than this or a dog have more dignity than to stay w/ a cruel owner.

A mew low for writers, It was just like watching a person take a gun put it in their mouth and pull the trigger. This will now be known as doing a mungo, maybe the author should take note. Pure shit.

Ok, I assume that if you have not guessed it in the first place, then by now (several comments have been submitted) you must have done so for sure. I mean – guessing what kind of a hornets nest you have maneuvered yourself into with the placement of THIS particular story in the L.W. section. Dear author. You may recall my appreciation to your originality and overall talent (I sure hope so!). But, how shall I put it delicately, ARE YOU NUTS? Do you have a (literary speaking of course) the equivalent of a death wish? WHY? Why put it in this section where what you are going to get AT BEST is the verbal equivalent of burning sulfur? It would have been a perfect excerpt from a censored section from one of Fellini’s Decadent films. It could have been A segment from a guilt ridden Victorian erotic literature where other wise All powerful abusive men enjoyed role playing the submissive.

One way or another you don’t want - I repeat, you don’t want to put this kind of uber submissive self humiliating husband into the loving wives section. I say that as I feel that you deserve to NOT be roasted (not that anyone does) based on your past writing, even if technically the theme could fit into the LW category, and even if the number of readers is larger in this section. Where else? It does not matter. BDSM seems like the natural candidate, and who knows you could even put it in letters. My main interest is not an outgrowth of a pedantic nomenclature obsession, just an interest in an opportunity for a less predicted judgment on your writing. <P>

Personally, I felt that it was more like a nightmare; or a horror day dream; maybe a segment from one of Dante’s Hell. But in all honesty, I could not relate to it, despite the usual high level of artistic language and style, as a picture of married life. Quite frankly, as it happens, and I am sure –inadvertently, it is almost an irritant, based on previous “militant” anti male non –stories, which in fact just seek to shock and provoke (very successfully). I say with some level of certainty that that’s not how you approach your writing, and in this case the mere change of allocation could solve the problem IMHO.

,

I read it, understood that the bed was talking and still thought the story sucked shit. To "the bullet", I suspect you desecrate the word as well as the projectile. It seems the only thing you like to shoot off is your mouth.

Give it up! Give it up! Give it up! There is nothing worse than pretense at literary cleverness.

Well, she turned him into a chuckhold and he did not even knot it the dumb SOB. He should have kicked her ass out and not had anything more to do with her. No telling what she might have passed onto him in the way of STD's or something even worse.

had to make a comment to give it zero...

<I>"I would be covered in her and her lover's mingled cum as it oozed out of her, but she was there with me."</I> Given her actions, it can safely construed that her presence might not be beneficial unless, of course, personal exposure to AIDS, herpes and syphilis is a goal. Let's see love conquer those.

<P>

Here's a fun fact: the discover of syphilis, an Italian doctor named Giovanni Fracastoro, alluded to the ailment as "the French Disease." What does that tell us?

<P>

Insofar as storytelling goes, this submission isn't very good. It's rather short, has no plot, features characters that I don't understand and has nothing to recommend itself in terms of prose. In other words, it's not very good fiction.

To sorry of a story to even finish reading. Literotica is becoming a dumping ground for poorly writen wimp stories.

The writing needs work but the concept of the bed telling the story is creative. Keep trying.

<p>Perhaps I was quick in claiming that this story would be totally misconstrued by the LW Nazis. I made the statement after I read the only two comments that were available when I read the story - both of which were LW Nazi comments. Now I count about 8 such comments. So give me the benefit of the doubt on this one, huh? When I'm right, I'm right.</p>

<p>The LW Nazis weren't the only ones to misread this one. Several other regular commentators who actually have the balls to leave their names also misunderstood this story, though I thought the point of it all was relatively obvious.</p>

<p>I gave the story a high grade for originality, if nothing else. Damn it's hard to find an original plot in these stories now adays.</p>

<p>I do agree that posting this story in the LW section was at least misleading. Then again, sometimes Literotica posts a story somewhere other than the author's original request. Maybe Lit misunderstood the story too.</p>

On a second read, I can see how I could have missed one possible interpretation of the story. I also agree with you on the high originality which merits encouragement in the feedback. Somehow this author succeeds in "trapping" me to either misread (in another piece) or miss one possible read of a story. Well, it is not a frequent occurrence when stories are written as hybrids of poems (IMO), with just as high an emphasis on image and metaphor as on plot and character. To be sure, from now on I’ll be a lot more careful with this author (meant as a compliment). <P>

I want to remind you though that there is more than one possible legitimate read to any possible literary work. The bed device could be taken both on a literary level but also as a metaphor to a real human being. While original, it's not unheard of. Take for example the satirical story “the nose” by Nikolai Gogol (hysterical!) where the main character, acting and talking like you and me is…a nose. In fact there is more than a bit of similarity between the two authors. I found the concept in Google with regard to Gogol and quickly identified the similarity per this story. It’s called: ‘poshlost’ which is approximated as “self satisfied inferiority”. IMO it works as an undertone (at least) both for the bed (as a bed) and for ABED as a metaphor for a man who is LIKE a bed…One way or another, I would be careful with the use of right and wrong reads of stories. Usually the better the author and the writing the

“thicker” is the text in what it allows the reader to read from it (as opposed say the straight forward one meaning only of a news piece on the first page of a newspaper). <P>

Finally, I would still be much happier if you could prove your originality, yet again, and come up with less inflammatory term then the ‘LW NAZIS’

(again, it belittles the crimes of the Nazis). Could you be inspired perhaps

By an occasional: ‘the mind police’ ‘the usual fanatics’ ‘the religious zealots’ ‘the mental midgets’ – hey, it’s getting to be too much fun! You get my gist…

Maybe it shouldn't be in loving wives, beyond that, it was a good story with a different twist. Not erotic, but interesting nonetheless.

I feel that I must offer some words in an attempt to balance the naysayers, who move their lips as they read and make comments in crayon. The story was one of very few that I felt worthy of downloading to my archives. I write a few stories myself for my own enjoyment and a few of my select friends. I only have one downside thing to say ... I wish I had thought of the idea. Keep writing, I thought it was very fresh concept, and tricky for those who weren't paying attention.

The story itself needs some work. There is an odd reference to the time "we spent abed" that doesn't fit the narrative voice, and a few blatant typos, like "loosing" for "losing." There's no actual plot, and no real attempt to invite us to engage with the characters.

But I give it a four simply for its ability to generate comments like the ones below. Well worth the read for the comments alone. Good job, mp3!

You let your wife chuckhold you right in front of you, you are enjoying this, you let men come on you? You must be as gay as the writer to think of something like this. You are not a man but a wimp that gets off on seeing his wife suck cock and make love to other men. You have become a cum dumpster for other men. You are in need of mental health treatment and you and the author need to get some help immediately. By the way, this is a loving wives story?

This is not necessarily my favorite type of story, but it was grammatically and technically quite well written.

The last thing you need to do is listen to the emasculated slime balls that attack the story line. Most of them are to ignorant to understand classical authors like Herman Hesse or Alexander Solzenitzen. I am absolutely positive that they have no idea who the Magister Ludi is or where the Gulag Archipelago is. To live in their ignorance must be truly bliss. But less I digress, the story does stand on its own so keep writing and you will improve. That is how life works, just like the naysayers bitch about the topic that they hate. They probably hate it because their wives do it to them and they don't have the backbone to stand up and be counted eve if it is being counted out.

I wish you sucess in the future.

Cary Sanderson

I hope the cowards notice that I have the BALLS to sign my name.

This story reads like a proper Victorian woman's version of erotica with some bad language thrown in. If you want to write literature there are much better venues out there. You have taken readers and ruined their concepts with sly and wordy phrases. How is it said, as yes, written on the wind and quickly erased by it.

Its a freaking bed. She is cheating on the bed. The author personifies the bed.

Don't be stupid

the husband? I guess since I challenge writers scenes and scenarios I am a LW nazi since I dont choose to use an Anony nick to hide behind like Da Bullet. As some have pointed out this piece has more than one interpretation and the reader, what is a writer without a reader, uses his own preception of what is and what isnt. So dear misunderstood and not thought much of bullet to each his own and quit complaining about people that dont choose to use an alias. When I can look up your nick in your cities phone book and read your name, address, and phone number in it we will know you are not just another anony brown shirt going around trying to force others to see it as you do.

try a good unabridged dictionary. There is a world of difference between Abed and A Bed. One refers to being a bed, a particular bed, and the other refers to a person being in the bed.

but it is not a tag team. TK U MLJ LV NV

And why is there a ch. 2?

A crock of shit

I wouldn't say it is rubbish.

Not bad, not good.

Was a nice effort at creativity, but once it is obvious the bed was talking, there just was no point.

The comments were actually more entertaining... especially from that bombastic, pretentious moron bullet. Man does he get his knickers in a twist.

You should read DreamCloud, GirlInTheMoon in Romance section if you seek what you claim

Well, that was really delightful. The scores reflect it's worth accurately.

Not much to be said or done with a fool like him.

wimp and whore

Why?