Hope this too short story is the start of a long series.
by
Anonymous07/05/07
Wating for Part I
Since there is a notation at the top of the story that calls this Part I, hopefully, it was accidentally posted out of order.
by
Anonymous07/05/07
The First Paragraph Says It All
It truly does. After seeing this "writer" doesn't know how to break up a long, run-on paragraph into several logical ones, you KNOW there's no sense in reading the whole "story." If you go on, the stilted, lifeless dialogue will drive you away. In short, this “writer” needs to attend several years of writing classes in order to progress beyond the third grade level in fiction.
This story needs an editor and a pass through a spell checker. It sounds like it was cut out of a much longer story, as their no opening to identijy people, and the story just stops, it doesn't really end.
Hot Start
Hope this too short story is the start of a long series.
Wating for Part I
Since there is a notation at the top of the story that calls this Part I, hopefully, it was accidentally posted out of order.
The First Paragraph Says It All
It truly does. After seeing this "writer" doesn't know how to break up a long, run-on paragraph into several logical ones, you KNOW there's no sense in reading the whole "story." If you go on, the stilted, lifeless dialogue will drive you away. In short, this “writer” needs to attend several years of writing classes in order to progress beyond the third grade level in fiction.
Editor Needed
This story needs an editor and a pass through a spell checker. It sounds like it was cut out of a much longer story, as their no opening to identijy people, and the story just stops, it doesn't really end.
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