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byicey_hearted©
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by Anonymous

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by champagne198207/21/07

alright

This poem has a strong idea, and gets it across in a straight forward way. To be constructive, my suggestion is that the poet attempt to include a few more poetic devices. I'd even go so far as suggesting making the entire poem rhyme rather than just the last strophe. My thought is, it takes more craft than what I see in this poem to make a good one. What's here is a good beginning and I'd like to see more story in a ballad type of poem.

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