All Comments on 'A Tale of Immorality Ch. 07'

of course with THIS author the hetro man being naturally inferior would star killing everything and everyone.

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WE still dont why why anne did this... how she could claim she loved George so much she had to cheat...

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<b> if one had not read chpater 2 3 4 5 or 6 you could read this chapter without wondering what was going on <b/>

You tell the whole story from her point of view, yet this ending, you tell from his. I can see several points you might have been making, heck, I have seem many of them all along.

The entire story, including this ending, still is boring. It is boring not for the subject or for the technical ability, or the format, but because at the end, it still feels like an exercise in writing and not a creative process. It lacks passion, though it is full of passionate words. It lacks sexuality, though it is full of sex. The bottom line is it lacks, but thankfully it is over.

After all the bullshit Anne talked you end it with out her getting the last word? She was so cocky telling us all her lame excuses for her whorish behavior. Now lets hear what she has to say. After the destruction of her "beloved" husband. Lets hear what she has to say now that her secret is out. Will she still be the haughty slut or will she suddenly be trying to figure out why she went insane and fucked up the one she claimed to love.

I am constrained to agree with the last comment - - this chapter summed up and clearly mooted any need for a reader to have read any other chapter, perhaps beyond the first one or two. Strangely, there is more emotion conveyed in this final chapter than in all of the previous ones.

I find myself puzzled, because you are such a talented writer and, even when I have not agreed with, liked or even tolerated one of your central figures in a past story I could always "feel" the emotion and at least see their point of view. Other than the late glimpse into George's personna, there was none of that in this story. Yet, as always, the story was very well written and edited.

I'd still like to see much more of your work. Best wishes, Bob

head strong women with selfish and vain ways looking for a way out of reality.she broke her husband in the worst way his ego and his maleness.the wife and lover got what they deserve,but there are other way besides volence.it's hard for a women to write what a man thinks,because they are from mars.the women should've been in a mental health center.now one more question,how bad is it in the hotel room.

Sorry, George going "postal" just does not fit the picture of George from chapters 1-6. Breaking down the hotel door, assaulting both the wife and her lover, maybe killing one or both, I just don't buy it. If he really did these things, then he should get off with a temporary insanity defense! The next logical step would be for him to commit suicide. You know, the murder-suicide thing we hear about in the news every week or two? George's actions might make sense if he were an uneducated street person, someone who was accustomed to using violence to achieve his goals, but the violent behavior just does not jibe with his sensitivity, his socioeconomic level, his education level, his careful rise to a top sales position within his company. I could see him possibly breaking down the door, confronting the couple, then filing for divorce. But I don't believe he would have gone to murder or attempted murder, not even if he caught his wife and lover in their own home. This just does not compute.

Though you write well, I question the need to string out this story the way you did. The story could have been completed in one piece on three or four pages with the desired effect. I still believe you like to play games with your readers by provoking knee-jerk responses.

Boyd

... are a bitch. I agree with Boyd. Why seven chapters? Hard end but good. Your words draw some impressive pictures. I like this. There are similarities to my story "soapbubbles." Thank you.

The writing is superb . . . even the petty complainers obviously read all seven chapters. Each should be savored as very entertaining fiction. After all, that's what it's about . . .

ruined a man's life. She was what she was, a whore. He was what he was a man in love. She used him as her safety net while she hunted her prey. Even as it finally came down she tried to defend her paramour instead of her protect her husband. Better she had died in a car accident before her wedding. His moment of temporary insanity seems hardly fitting for a jail term. Hopefully he will find a jury as lenient to him as the Texas jury was to the woman who with calculation drowned her own children. But then that woman used hours of planning to conduct her savage murders chasing down her own children and holding them under water. This poor man just burst into a room to find his wife being used as a common whore, his crime is obviously less than that woman's or for that matter his wife's against him. You have a flair for words but portray women at their worst and in no way part of a monogamous society, do you consider them still primitive and for use for the entire tribe?

as usual, very well written. you have a way w/ words. excellent job. anticipating the next chapter. you sure do know how to stir the hornets nest.

First Angique gave us "A TASTE of Immorality" (re-written as "A TALE of Immorality Ch 01). Then we got "A Taste of Consequence" (here as Ch 07). Why 01, 02, etc. Why not 1, 2,etc. Do we need to look out for more double digits. Is this Angique's "Back to Bristol"? Is George really the Fat Lady in this story by Anne about Anne?

You make a great post. None of this story works b/c George as THIS author developed him is out of character. This author does not understand straight hetreosexual men at all. This author did this same sort of thing in another one of her stories JOHN CERUTTI.

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from this author's distorted viewpoint she has Hetro man as doing one of TWO things...

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either hetro men scream at each other in estrogen laced rages while they throw dishes and call each other Bitch ... see this author's LOVE IS A SILK BLINDFOLD.... or the hetro sexual male reverts back to his primitive knuckle dragging neanderthal ways killing everyone and everything.

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will Angiquesophie ever get a clue? Nope... anymore than NICI will

This chapter may be a bit out of sync with the rest of the story, but only because George is not given a chance to show the range of emotion Anne had. His reaction, and actions, are certainly within the range one might expect. The writing is good. I hope that Anne is still alive and there will be a confrontation at some point, if the story goes forward. Perhaps Anne will be irresistably drawn to the District Atty and the judge and get George off!!

One of the abilities of a good author is to be able to create believable characters. These creations should have their own set of "characters." They should not think or sound the same like in this story. The way that George sounds is the same as his wife. They are both arrogant. They both use basically the same kind of florid language. They both state their case, their thoughts and feelings, then warn the reader not to judge them. So here we have a story where the female and male point of view is exactly the same because the writer chose to give them the same personna, the same mentality even if the actions and incidents were different.

out of nowhere! well, that surely gets everyones attention. did not expect that. you tormented some w/ tales of wife's infidelities. now here's the husband. wow!

you are a master. excellent.

But I hate your stories! Still I have not been

able to srop reading them. I imagine that if I

had personal contact with you, that I too would make use

of a lamp...

<p>I suppose the <i>LW</i> section isn't for people who love the written word. Something written by a neanderathal with palsy would get high grades if his story followed the party line. JD Sallinger would be ridden out of town on a rail by the same voters.</p>

<p>There are almost transcendental moments of writing in this story. In this chapter hubby talks about relooking at his life through new eyes, thereby seeing the things he missed when using his old eyes. It's remarkable and original and you guys don't give a shit. Amazing.</p>

<p>Keep feeding on the horsecrap you are usually fed in the <i>LW</i> section, guys. I'll take stuff like angiquesophie gives us. I'll admit that sometimes it doesn't taste great. But it's more filling.</p>

I thought the story was well written, and had the power to grab your attention and hold onto it-true of the whole series. While I am sure most sensed the trainwreck approaching, it was still intriguing enough a thread to keep reading each story to see how it was going to turn out. You took a challenging theme, articulated the nuances very well, and overall worked the thread masterfully. Congratulations.

You know what I consider the saddest comment of all is that this author is really a decent writer. Unfortunately , her characters are flawed, incomplete parodies of humans. And she has them go on & on, & on, & on, & on... well you get the picture. Unfortunately, also, she has her male characters be so completely one-dimensional, so stereotypical one way or the other, that there is no way that I can even begin to get into the "willing suspension of disbelief" mode to try to understand how these shadow men could even get married, have any kind of life, or a job, or even carry on a semi-intelligent conversation for that matter. I'd like her for once try to write a story about a complete man, a believable character, then maybe she could reach her full potential, that sadly, so far I believe she has not, and seemingly cannot reach. And that to me, given her obvious talent, is perhaps the saddest indictment of all.

I read this chapter and I schemed through the previous chapters. I was groaning; so much ‘style’ and ‘atmosphere’ and so precious little invested in creating believable characters -at least male characters. So much is written from the POV of the self serving narcissistic wife that the shift to the miserable caricature of George never really happens. It's a thinly veiled continuation of the ongoing contempt belittling and disrespect all wrapped in self serving bogus rationalizations the "loving" wife pours over her thick and naive husband throughout this agonizing male bashing saga. Only in this gory chapter it takes the form of showing not telling. It shows you as ‘a proof’ - see what happens when you let those poor underdeveloped yahoos, called husbands, which we – the worldly sophisticated women have to shield from our true lives for their own good, be exposed even for one hour to reality? They simply can’t handle it, those dim witted dangerous male creatures. <P>

My advice to you as to previous similar authors: talk to three INDEPENDENT men (not meaningful others, relatives or friends) for their opinion on your writing with regard to the issue of the perspective of the genders. Your work has a real problem there. No matter how ‘nice’ the style, the gender perspective flattens the plot and the characters to a level of caricatures

Amend that the cheating idiot & the husband both deserved to be die & fortunately did. So the slut lives but she should have been deprived of her best features.

Horrible. Men like George should go to prison for life.

Stupid slut finally got what she deserved, unfortunately she should have died a slow & lonely death. George finally man's up but way to stupid to be a plausible character. The whole series sucks but this chapter was worth skimming.

I also rated it 1, because the entire series is like bile.

But just as he deserves life in prison for being the loving, attentive and blind husband he had been... til a shock let him see the truth, and he found it unacceptable to his mind... she deserves the death penalty. In the last chapter, she can't face that option because she is pregnant and it may be his.

Whether it is Georges or not, it does not deserve to be brought up damaged, as it will be, whether under the influence of the old Anne or the new Anne. That is also a life-sentence.

It's perspective will end up warped and misguided. She says she will call it George or Georgina or something... either way, I think Anne gave the child the middle name DWornock, whatever the fuck that means.

the beginning of the resolution of the series. Unfortunately, changing the POV - while still maintaining the same carefully structured style - simply didn't work very well. In some ways, since I see there is a chapter to come, I think this one may prove to have been an irrelevance.

She was caught. Excellent. Whore. Shame the lover died. Call me tonight, see if I'm sleeping. You have my respect again author. One more chapter.

don't for one minute think this mess can ever be over, TK U MLJ LV NV

How many times do you read about a husband or boyfriend killing a cheating wife or girlfriend as well as the interloper? Yes, murder is wrong but it is clear to most that killing a cheating spouse and their lover is somehow justified. They have put the offended party in an untenable position. There was no attempt to behave in a civilized manner and get a divorce first. The cheater is attempting to steal love and sex from the offended spouse and give it to another person. While not legal, it seems this type of killing is more justifiable than something like abortion which is legal. Regardless of the legalities, as long as people are people this will continue. I am glad to read one of the few stories on this site that recognizes this outcome.

that she got caught is no surprise, that it took this long is.

Powerful and moving. Reads like a Mickey Spillane novel.

Awesome scene, well done for a quick vignette. OldBearSwitch

I expected they would get caught but murder? That is extreme. Insanity.

What they Deserved. He should have known better then to Bed a Married Woman. And if she had to have her Strange she could have told him she wanted a Divorce and Screwed the Troops. The only one's to feel Sorry for are George and A-Holes Family.

A man of action.

Guess Anne found out the hard way that if you play, sometimes you pay. Dearly.

Is the same Character as Elaine, from another story.

hummmm I wonder if she'll cheat again?

All of this writer's works show her to think that all women are faithless whores of the worst kind.

Takes one to know one. I guess.

This is the end created by a characterless person!

This the violence I predicted would happen in a story like this.

This level of betrayal. Of hurt. Of anger.

This is what sociopaths cannot fathom. They do not have the ability to feel normal human emotions so they cannot forsee how their selfish and narcissistic behavior will affect the emotional responses of other humans.

Please. Please do not allow this woman to procreate. Even in this make believe world. This woman would completely ruin a child if one was left in her care.

Finally some good fucking food!

She is a text book portrayal of a narcissistic sociopath. Her husband action while tragic for him, is a clear example of just how badly a good person can be shattered to a primitive level from which they may never be able to recover. She is truly a monster and deserves to burn in hell.

The writer has done a brilliant job in this chapter.!

Violence solves nothing> But, it feels really good when you win.