but good enough to read. One confusing problem was using the word lean for the word clean, this happened more than once.
by
Anonymous11/21/07
Okay
The story was cool. I felt that there is more to be desired from reading the story. For instance what happened between chance and fiona or did chance find out about david and fiona or is fiona staying with david and leaving chance or was david just a revenge fuck. The story was good I just like there should have been more maybe. I liked the direction the story was going too. Maybe you should do another chapter that would be cool. You can get me by email at shaqforte@yaho.com
English
Somewhat confusing, probably belongs in SciFi
but good enough to read. One confusing problem was using the word lean for the word clean, this happened more than once.
Okay
The story was cool. I felt that there is more to be desired from reading the story. For instance what happened between chance and fiona or did chance find out about david and fiona or is fiona staying with david and leaving chance or was david just a revenge fuck. The story was good I just like there should have been more maybe. I liked the direction the story was going too. Maybe you should do another chapter that would be cool. You can get me by email at shaqforte@yaho.com
WHY
Is it not finished? Why did you not take the bit of extra time to make the ending better? It started off good but ended badly.
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