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His Marchioness Ch. 01

bylittle_mermaid©
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Comments (8)
by Anonymous

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by Anonymous12/09/07

good job

please continue, though longer chapters would be better. great beginning though!

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by Anonymous12/09/07

great so far

yes you must post more.soon.great start and i agree longer chapters.

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by Anonymous12/10/07

Not bad, but needs more detail

I think this opening chapter of the story should have provided the reader more detail and information. You gave only the bare bones of a short scene, leaving the reader wondering who each character is. I think the writing itself was fine but I think more detail, more story line, would pull more readers in.

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by little_mermaid12/10/07

Thank You

Thank you for writing the feedback. Well I know it was short. I just wanted to see if anyone liked it at all or not or whether anyone wanted to read it anymore or not. Or should I not post here, rather just write for myself. :)

I ll do this, this time around - i ll post the next 2 of my chapters in a single submission so that you can read a little more about the characters. i dont know when they will get approved though. i m new to this site and am not familiar with all the formats that they ask for over here. i just use plain ol' MS word. :(

i submitted the first chapter more than a week ago. i m posing the next entry right now. lets c how long it takes to get approved :|

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by sadness12/17/07

I'm intrigued

and would like to know more about what has happened and what will happen between these two. Please continue this story.

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by fortunamajor12/17/07

confusing...

this looks to be a promising read in the future..but i was very confused with the character's name, is it cassie or bella? or is it both? maybe her name is cassie isabella?? i think you should stick to just one name for clarity sake..i kept on looking up and down to page to make sure im reading the right thing! again- quite a good effort though..

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by little_mermaid12/29/07

trying

well i submitted the next 2 chapters more than a month back, but it got rejected. some stupid mistake of mine - error of punctuation marks. i am not yet familiar with the rules of this site and am not sure which editor should i bug either. so sorry to all of you who wanted to, but could not read the next chapter.

i have again submitted the next 2 chapters (hopefully without any further errors). i hope you get to read them by next week or so. happy new year!

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by Anonymous04/19/09

what happen next??????????????????????????

Its wonderful story. I do think you've given up on it beacause the last post you made was 2007. It sucks especially since you left us hanging. For that reason alone I probaly won't read anymore of your submitted stories. I'd be afraid you'd cut it off in middle of the story.

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