All Comments  for

The Troublemaker

byDG Hear©
All
Comments (53)
by Anonymous

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by Anonymous12/05/07

DG

Thanks for the story. Yours never "set up" the scene like a lot of would be writers for a cheating wife to take place. I guess wimp writers write about wimp husbands. Glad yours arent.

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by DesertPirate12/05/07

Once again

Damn You write a fine story. Somehow I suspect more of us have had moments of "temper" than we would like to admit. With maturity we learn to control it and life gets better. What a fine story and a nice Holiday treat!

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by Anonymous12/05/07

thnx dg good work as always!

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by Anonymous12/05/07

Timeline problems

Does this story take place in the future? It has to, otherwise it makes no sense.

The war with Iraq started in March 2003. Assuming Randy joined the marines right at the beginning, he spent 6 months in training then went to Iraq for 'a few years'. Let's assume between training and his tour, he was in the marines for 3 years. That brings us to March 2006. So between March 2006 and December 2007, Randy met a girl, got married, spent 8 months in jail, met another girl, married her, had a baby, and has another on the way? Taking out the time in jail, that means in 13 months he got married twice, had a kid, and impregnated Sandy again. Not very plausible.

To anyone who is bound to say 'He didn't say it was THIS Iraq war, duh. It could be Gulf War 1', no it couldn't, since we didn't occupy Iraq in that war.

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by Orion62312/05/07

Reacting first

and then thinking second has got more than a few of us in trouble. Good story.

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by Nucleus12/05/07

One more ...

... nice story of yours. Maybe a little similar to your story "Bad Boy" but it doesn't matter. I like it. Thank you.
Sincere regards
Nucleus from "Knut" country

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by JakeRivers12/05/07

An uplifting story of love and redemption.

Well done as always - good luck on the contest.

Regards, Jack

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by Anonymous12/05/07

Passable

DG, You have written some fine stories. This one however, was not one of your best. With two editors I don't know how so many grammatical errors and misspellings escaped their attention.
There was too little tension here. The Beth character was a throw-a-way. She could have been eliminated from the plot. As for his first wife, I found myself asking why he married her. You tell us that she eventually married her lover and that she was a cheater, then no more. Did she get her just desserts? The lover took a hit from his children and in his divorce but what of Shelly? This part of the story read as if it was truncated to save space.
When our hero meets the woman he will marry you add the potential conflict with her ill friend near the end. But that episode seemed to be hastily added to the story. If you were trying to show that our hero had changed then you should have drawn out that entire scene. Instead it happens so quickly that the impact was minimal.
The bottom line was that I could not get emotionally connected to this story or the characters. Perhaps I've seen them before in a couple other of your stories. Here they were not fleshed out enough.
One thing I like about your stories is that you write about working class people. However, I would argue that their lives are much more interesting than you have presented here or in your other stories.

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by Risq_00112/05/07

I dunno, I kinda liked it....

And what is scary is that I see my brother a lot in this character. I believe (and I really do hope) he's finally grown up now that he's expecting his first kid, but he could have mirrored this character a lot with his hit first and ask questions later actions

To me the characters were believeable, not over the top, and I didn't feel like people were getting it over on the main charater. I was kinda curious about his first wife Shelly. I mean he said that Brett shouldn't have married her, but I was wondering if that is because she did something to make him think this, or because it was just a prediction on his part.

But I thought it was done pretty well

-Risq

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by peggytwitty12/05/07

A very good story

You have done another good job. Thanks for the entertainmentPT

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by Anonymous12/05/07

Wow!

Two stories by DG Hear in one day. What more can we ask for. Both were very nicely wriiten. For anyone who follows your stories, like I do would have to believe that you put a part of yourself in every story. Each story has common traits. Thank you for another wonderful story.
A fan

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by Anonymous12/05/07

Like eating a bologna sandwich

every day for months on end. You're still glad that there's something in your lunch bucket, but wish evey once in a while your wife would include a piece of cheese just for a change. Or better yet, something entirely different, say ham or roast beef? DG has become a legend but also he has become formulamatic. With each story, you can see many, many parts of other stories of his. I won't go into the details because if you'd paid any attention at all to his library you already know what I mean. DG please keep writing but do us all a favor and reread your own stories. The next story you write may have already been posted by you before. This comment is out of respect for your work and not meant to be spiteful.

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by Anonymous12/06/07

Love You Stories

I love your stories. I enjoy seeing your name as I scroll the topics. Keep up the good work.

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by gatorhermit12/06/07

Good Story; Great Ending

Elements of several DG-type characters in here as has been noted already, but this is a good story to just sit down and read. Well paced and believable character development.

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by Anonymous12/06/07

KUDO's Author

Another in a long string of very well written stories in a vernacular that anyone should be able to relate to and understand.

You write to life and its consequence with a strong sense of reality and the ability to bring it home with clarity.

A ray of sunshine that others could also project once in a while but don't for their own reasons I guess.

Don't change a thing - just keep doing what you do so well at interval.

Thanks Again Author

With Very High Regard

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by Anonymous12/06/07

Liked it very much

and so what if it's a little formulaic. It's like a old dear friend that you just keep liking to see over & over. DG, you just keep writing them, I'll just keep reading & enjoying them. Thanks

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by Anonymous12/06/07

Really enjoyed reading this

It kept my interest and moved at a good pace.

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by Anonymous12/06/07

Get Yours TODAY!!!

DG - - - This rather troubled world we live in is in need of some good bright spots, and you are one of them. Most of us who read your stories smile inside and feel a little better because of what they have read. I have considered "Formulamatic", and think I have seen them advertised on TV for $19.95, made by RONCO. A quarter and the "?" button gets you perhaps a bologna sandwich, maybe a book on good story writing, or best yet, a DG Hear story. Please ignore the nitpickers and just continue to make us humble folk smile when we need it, by doing what you do so well. Grammar? There are college graduates out there who cannot spell for sour apples, or think that a noun is a woman who wears Black Habits. Keep on writing, pal, we needs ya!! Prof. Ramstein

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by Katyusha12/06/07

Sweet

I thought it was an uplifting story that really demonstrated both how true love can happen and also what can happen when we're burned. I thought that Randy showed a good deal of development through the story, and though he's not over his jealousy, he shows that he'll work on it. Good job.

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by KOLKORE12/06/07

I liked your prescription to happiness

Communication and love making -where can you go wrong with that? It read like a hybrid of Loving wives and Romance (mostly romance actually and was indeed a heart warming tale. Thanks.

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by PEATBOG12/06/07

Superb!!!

DG, you can’t please all the people all of the time, but you are always damn close to it! This story is a realistic portrayal of life and the relationships therein and our hero deserved and got a second chance at happiness and true love. Those of us who love ‘Happy Endings’ should be very happy with this one. DG, just keep writing and we'll keep enjoying your genius. A truly excellent story! Enough said! Pete.

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by jakie112/06/07

Two Words

Thank You!

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by cageytee12/06/07

Thanks for yet another great read!

As I've said so many times . . . a new DG Hear makes the day a great one!

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by bornagain12/06/07

A Real Winner

DG I think you have a Blue Ribbon on this story its full of spirit ,love,and jealousy ,I give it hands up for this story I hope you win DG.

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by MagicaPractica12/07/07

Heart Warming

My favorite moment was when they agreed to always talk things out instead of just reacting. More people need to learn that lesson.

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by Anonymous12/09/07

Great Story

Great story. All people make mistakes and if you are really in love you need to forgive them if possible but the other side of the same coin is that people need to think before they act because you can't go back in time and redo what has already happened. Before you do something you need to think about how you would feel if the shoe is on the other foot so to speak.

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by PAPATOAD07/27/08

Great development

Enjoyed the way the characters developed. It is easy to get comfortable with the gradual flow of events. Thanks for a good read.

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by Anonymous09/20/09

Communication huh?

One way communication or is it that when only one is truthful? You can judge the sincerity and honesty of another's words yet be dead wrong if they're a habitual liar and so used to lying they carry it through easily. In instances like that does 'communication' work for you?

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by Rob Conner11/30/10

Good Story!

Good Story! Well Written (as usual!). Gave it a FIVE!

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by DWornock06/12/11

What garbage

That the Iraqis need our help. I gave it a 1

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by LordSlamdawgg10/21/11

Five stars

I read a story this & think it's simple.I've tried to do stories like this .... Not so simple at all. Great read. Thanks to the author for sharing.

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by chytown12/11/11

Good Read!!

Just a plain well written very entertaining story. Thanks for sharing.

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by jiminab03/18/12

Liked it

May have been a bit set piece but it was very enjoyable. Thanks for that. But I see that DWidiot has been here shat and left. His/her comments are more offensive than Harrys. I am sorry you guys get this kind of crap for giving us your efforts for free.

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by tazz31703/22/12

UP AND DOWN ROUND AND ROUND

and it stops on a winner. TK U MLJ LV NV

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by Anonymous06/07/12

simple and effective

really a nice story.

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by Drbeamer333302/25/13

Enjoyed it

Great tale. Thanks.

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by Anonymous03/03/14

worst part of this story.

You may actually believe that shit about Iraq.

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by betrayedbylove03/05/14

Excellent

Great tale. I'm not really a happy ending kind of guy but this was an exception. When good people have a happy ending it's heartwarming. Our hero deserved to be happy. Five Stars

Damn I said happy four times.
Ha

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by Tavadelphin05/13/14

For those who confuse romance with politics -

The Iraq war exists - whatever -

FAR more important -the story was well conceived and written well with compassion and love being the paramount truth for most of the people in it.

For those obsessed with other issues:

Troops have been there and done good things for the actual people living in the villages and towns there - TRUTH

Much has been abused, we have been abused, troops have been betrayed and abused, the populace has been abused, money has been abused - many troops have returned and been pleased to have done what they perceive as good things, building hospitals, schools, housing - peoples lives have been saved by action by the troops - get over it - they did good. Whether good was done overall or not.

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by KarenE06/14/14

Nit Picks

Okay, gonna do my usual nitpicking here.

You refer to a small wedding and big reception to save money. It's then reception that costs the money, so you want a small reception to keep costs down.

If you don't want to pay for them to get drunk you want a CASH bar. An open bar is when the drinks are free for the guests and you pay.

You made a point about the white wedding dress. I did notice in some of your other stories the bride didn't wear white for the second marriages. The tradition of white for only first marriages died a merciful death years ago. It's only stick-up-their-butt busybodies who care about that crap these days.

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by Anonymous07/19/14

Gratitude

The whole world owes a huge debt to those who served in the American Military. U.S. politics at times sucks but we should never confuse that or add it to the mix where the guys 'on the ground' are simply trying to get a lousy job done and get home to their loved ones safely!!
A good simple story, well told.

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by krosis66608/24/14

To the comment on 7/19/14 'gratitude'

Please leave your political propaganda and bullshit off this site. You are free to believe whatever crap you are told to believe to save you from using your brain, but don't foist it on the rest of us. You have your opinion, great, but this is not the site for it. Comment on the story and the writing here, and save the propaganda for the sites devoted to it! I certainly have my own opinions on your comments, but this isn't the place to debate or refute them.

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by krosis66608/24/14

Regarding this story

I thoroughly enjoyed it. What wonderful women Sandy and Rachel are. Did I misunderstand the line about Sandy wearing a white gown, and nobody complaining? Isn't white traditional at a wedding? Why would there be a problem there? Or did I completely misread the sentence, and it was referring to something entirely different? One of my favourite Dg stories.

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by Zigmyster09/07/14

to krosis666

This is in regards to your comment about Rachael wearing a white wedding gown: Some people will disagree that she should not wear white because of already having a child. This comes from old traditions that women are still virgins until they consummate their marriage.

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by OhRhett11/18/14

I am an old softy

I loved it. And I am an old 240 lbs. rounder with scarred-up knuckles and heart. Thanks for an interesting chick flick story for aged-out bar-fighters.

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by tazz31711/19/14

DOES SERIAL CHEATING RUN AGAINST

certain types or is it random. TK U MLJ LV NV

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by Anonymous11/19/14

rambling

Went from loving wives to romance. That was after the bull shit analysis about the US invasion and occupation of Iraq. Right. Before the US came there were no schools in Iraq. Sure.

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by Tw0Cr0ws11/19/14

gee, anon. 11/18/14

They didn't have schools?
Is that why he was REbuilding schools?

Seems more like your own politics are showing.

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by rightbank11/19/14

this is and "ah shucks" kinda story

warm fuzzies all around.

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by xtchr11/22/14

Great Feel-Good Story!

I enjoyed this story. It has characters that I actually admire. The guy had to start over with nothing and seemed to change his trouble-making ways. I am cheering for these people and in my mind they live happily-ever-after. Good Job and Thank You.

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