I liked the way you built the bar scene piece by piece, almost like a painting. Without dwelling on the obvious, you created a warm, leisurely atmosphere that blended beautifully into the coupling later on. The neat little conclusion was a special touch.
by
Anonymous12/22/07
pleasant surprise
This was probably one of the best stories I've read in a while. Short and sweet with details vivid enough to paint a picture in my mind, erotic enough to get me hot, and the perfect last line to make this story truly romantic. Great job.
by
12/22/07
Fantastic
I adore stories like this where there is a twist ending. I really enjoyed the running commentary about the couple making out. The sex was hot and the ending amazing.
by
Anonymous12/22/07
Great
I enjoyed your story very much. I took the time to read some of your older stories and enjoyed them all very much.
Like a painting
I liked the way you built the bar scene piece by piece, almost like a painting. Without dwelling on the obvious, you created a warm, leisurely atmosphere that blended beautifully into the coupling later on. The neat little conclusion was a special touch.
pleasant surprise
This was probably one of the best stories I've read in a while. Short and sweet with details vivid enough to paint a picture in my mind, erotic enough to get me hot, and the perfect last line to make this story truly romantic. Great job.
Fantastic
I adore stories like this where there is a twist ending. I really enjoyed the running commentary about the couple making out. The sex was hot and the ending amazing.
Great
I enjoyed your story very much. I took the time to read some of your older stories and enjoyed them all very much.
Boyd
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