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Another place and time.
Despite the misspellings, the fact that I just didn't buy her reaction to Hugh forcing himself on her in the back of the store, and the over emphasis on how hard life was (we got it the first couple times you said it) I thought it was a good effort. The plot is a solid romance pattern of misunderstandings between a couple. His willingness to accept her despite the fact she is pregnant with another man's child shows the depth of his feelings. You took us to that place and time.
Nothing like the feeling and smell of fresh hay
There's nothing like doing it in a hill of fresh hay. I remember a barn in Indiana with a girl named Marianne instead of Marylou.
Good luck in the contest.
Interesting read..
Not nearly what I expected.
Not bad, but too short
This has the potential to be a much better story than it is, but as it is, all three characters are way too undeveloped to hold any genuine interest. Why does the hero blindly trust the villain? Why would the villain fool his "best friend", and why, with his swarthy good looks (a cliche, that), does he choose to be a rapist? And only women in porn stories (by men) enjoy -- even a little -- being forcibly "impaled" and anally raped.
Dump the slut
Chuck/Wimp
5
to offset the asshole of LIT's 1 vote
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