All Comments on 'O'Scouries Valentines Day Wife'

Very intense,hope he moves on. Thanks!

I loved the story line and it was really well written. Not quite at the same level in terms of conveying emotions, but a good read.

Thanks for writing and submitting.

You are not British are you? I saw nothing in your story to indicate that you enjoyed being humiliated. Your prick isn't three inches and leaking and immediately gets hard (raging) when your wife mentions another man ...like for instance (the mailman brought this today). I have gotten where I don't even click on to certain writers that are like the above. I can't stand wimps. I respect a man that gets bloodied and looses a fight more than I respect a man who has his feet frozen or ejaculates when he sees his wife fucking another man. Hope to read more by you. I see that you write mostly incest, which is why I've never clicked you.marriedwithballs@yahoo.com

Loved it ;;;;;Excellent;;;;

what with chip on your back?cool out and enjoy the comments.stop trying to goat people into a fight.you're a hero on this site to your fans.

I was enjoying the story until he screws her after he knows what a whore she is. Hellooo, what is he fucking crazy. 88 men screwed her so she must have a variety of std s. This chick never loved him. Screwing after knowing in the eyes of the law is forgiving her. This dog don't hunt. Luis

Excellent story. Please write a follow-up from the wife's point of view. Was I right in thinking the wife's father is the real father of the children?

If the wife is the victim of incest, it would be a good resolution to have her go into therapy and perhaps rebuild her marriage. Incest, in the real world, can be very damaging for the whole of a person's life. Sex life of the couple was good, so perhaps the cheating was due to a mental problem.

I loved the characters and the story. Thanks for your words and time you put into it.

He deserved some terrible punishment for raping and impregnating his own daughter.

I think the writer is way overated, I really did'nt enjoy this

its entertaining. could have more emotions but it works.

This story was overwritten in some places; in others, we were left trying to divine the writer's intentions with too little information. I don’t have a clue why some writers always make their characters richer than the Kennedy clan but I’m sick of it. From here on out, every story with characters who are more than comfortable will be marked down for that reason alone. The action in this story was implausible and unsupported by any foundation or build up. The punctuation was barely adequate, but the writer doesn’t have any idea how punctuation can help the flow of the story. The writer’s grammar was adequate, but any writer who can’t capitalize “God” gets an immediate down mark. In short, this story was superficial and largely unemotional. If it were a report in your local newspaper, it would be fine--but for a fictional account of a tremendously emotional event in a family’s life, it barely passes the lowest standards.

hope there is a follow up

liked it alot,same as with most all your stories

No way in hell a woman can be that sexually active with unprotected sex and not have had a variety of very interesting infections and diseases. I wonder how she got hubby to get treated without him knowing what was going on. The daughters were not his problem, they never were, she was just a fucking slut. To bad he didnt grow up after the divorce. For that I lowered your score.

Wow Jim, when you give us a cheating wife you certainly do an outstanding job of it! I would like to hear her side of the story since you didn't paint her as a complete monster. Pete

As long as he knows that she will screw anything with a dick I hope they live happily ever after probably with him eating cream pies even if does not know it.

<p>Personally I thought you did a pretty good job of writing the story. It made me laugh, I found myself doing what the characters did right before I read it (What three??, Eighty Eight??) I thought that was pretty good, it made me feel like I was sitting there with the character when they went through what they found out.</p>

<p>I even liked the fact that he wasn't sitting there feeling bad enough for himself that he didn't even <i>try</i> to date other women. And while I didn't like the ending where he and the wife seem to be back in each others arms, I do recognize that there is a history of love and mutual attraction on both of their parts, and that doesn't go away over night.</p>

<p>In all I thought it was done extremely well. Thanks for the good read.</p>

-Risq

As a self-proclaimed author of erotica, I have to commend you on a well-rounded, can't-put-down story. The story line continuously moved along and the characters were developed just enough to make the reader aware of who and what each might be without boring the reader with unnecessary detail. I definitely have to read more of your work!!!

give you a 100 because there is no clue what her motivation was to be and to do what she had done, including the risk of having somebody else's baby. the rest, apart from the last fuck (she not worth it to die, living in time of aids and her never using anything otherwise no babies)is splendid, if there is a next chapter. otherwise its just unfinished.

You had me... right up until the end. He knew Months ago she was a SERIAL cheater; Planned for months & left her on Valentines day.

<br></br>

after all that... Why fuck her again? His entire marriage & fatherhood is fake.

<br></br>

Did she love him or his 100 rating? isnt he the least bit concerned he might have a STD given his wife is such a ravenous whore?

<br></br>

The way this guy is developed I cant see how he would fuck her again knowing his daughters are not his and that she is STILL fucking other men.

I can't believe you ended it there, but I think I know who the father is of the girls. Thanks

This story is nearly perfect. What it need for perfection is a second chapter. This appears to be a continuation-type story.

I found O'Scouries' story interesting to the point of not being able to finish reading it non-strop, cleverly prepared, and believable.

It is refreshing to have a new, top-notch writer post his work in "Loving Wives" where, as of late, I have noted a decline in the number of stories by top authors. RAG

Thanks for writing!

When I finnish a story I vote how I feel. I thought you developed the chactors enough to support the story. I appreciate your sense of justice. The irony that they wanted money from him - the supposed gold digger.

High Regards: Cthru

She got pregnant by her father? Twice? Somehow that speaks to me of collusion. Was that the price she paid to marry him? She couldn't have his children?<p>

She has sex with 88 men after they are married? And how many more while they were dating? She has casual sex with pickups like the barman? What diseases is she potentially infecting him with? Oh yeah, she "really" loves him.<p>

And he still has sex with her? Does he have a death wish? Move on, idiot. She was never faithful to you. Never intended to have your children. She is a cheat and a liar and betrayed you as badly as a woman can betray a man. It's not too late to find a woman that will love you and actually bear you your "own" children.

I think you left us hanging but thanks for sharing.

I'm not surprised to find the commentary from "the usual suspects" in these 'cheating' Loving Wife stories. Although I doubt I would ever stay with an untrue wife (I've never been tested on this); I VERY often suspect in many of these cases that they are males who are immature and/or have never 'truly' loved a real woman. Women who act out sexually as she did usually have problems dating back to their relationship to their father....with lack of attention/approval this can be as "minor" as an eating disorder and/or all kinds of sexual problems, and all the way up to being suicidal; especially if the relationship was sexual (as this one surely was). If you've seen the movie 'Chinatown', you may recall she referred to her daughter as "my daughter, my sister" Not that it matters, I think that with possible counseling, they might have a relationship or even marriage since it's likely that she couldn't help or restrain herself. I also enjoyed that you added (with the 'possibility' of another '100') something at the end that is usually missing in these stories and (unfortunately) in the world today in general...since the advent of extreme feminism...that every woman needs to have some aspect of 'mystery' to her personality to be at all sexy. Sexiness is found in that which is NOT seen, but left to the imagination. I hope to be reading more of your work soon. _ Budd

I wanna know what is written in the first volume. I don't know why, but he fucking her again after the divorce didn't enrage me like it would. I bet because he isn't heart-sickened like how other authors portray these betrayed husbands.

I agree with Harry, it was good until the end and then he caved in like a wimp. Kill 'em all, let God sort 'em out. I only arrange the meetings.

well done story rated on top but flat closing

No you did not cave. There is nothing wrong with getting some from an ex, and he is the only DADDY the girls have known.

Thank you for the entertainment and the story.

Mike from Texas

I don't object to Patrick ripping off a piece at the end - just a freebe and by that point it doesn't matter (he's not taking her back, he's just using her). To me the kids being a product of deliberate incest is the depressing part, and with no negative consequences at all for slime-ball Reggie. Would have been a much stronger story if they'd have gone to trial, although the 2 girls would be needlessly hurt in that event.

Didn't anyone else notice that the author screwed up the dates of the diary entries? The first entry was 1993; the next two, including the one where Patrick lost his virginity, were dated 2007.

I think it's very believable that 2 such passionate people would still fall into each other's arms even after a bitter divorce. My only fault with the narrator's actions was that, after learning Vikki's father had raped her, he didn't investigate whether the scumbag had also raped the teenage girls. Even though Patrick wasn't their father, he loved them so much I can't imagine he wouldn't have done more to protect them.

I don't remember reading any of your previous work, but I am going right now to check out your other stories. Thanks for an exciting story in what has become a lifeless category recently.

If I was only rating this on quality of writing I'd probably give it 100, however its supposedly a valentine's day entry and I found that this story did nothing for me when it comes to romance and love which are supposedly the two elements of the day.............

when you add in the fact that I found Victoria to be completely unsympathetic and stupid. So stupid that I had to question just how she got into college, although the diary indicating that she fucked her professors suggests how she passed classes..............

and I couldn't find the hero much better. How could he not notice that she was sleeping around? And why even consider taking her back. Yes the sex is good, but she's got less loyalty than benedict arnold. She could have told him, or warned him before, but instead slept around and even wrote about it and rated her partners. Why would you want someone like that back?..........

The characters have to be ones I can relate to in order for me to rate it higher. It was a good story, but the poor plot development and plastic characters made it impossible to rate higher.

"COCKSUCKER," Reggie hissed at my retreating back. <p>

I turned back slowly, pierced him with a stare for seconds before saying, "Reggie, if you touch either of those two girls I'll cut your prick off and shove it down your throat." Then I walked out of the room. <p>

+++++++++++++++++ <p>

I love most of Scouries stories; but this one, I didn't read. Wow, "Paddy" sounds like he just got out of the NAVY SEALS or some other even more secretive/deadly military organization.... <p>

Was Reggie the DNA-father of "real father Paddy's" two gurls? <p>

So, at the end, the two girls mother, his former wife Victoria, shows up at his door and he opens it and pulls her in and before she knows it, he big hard dick is inside her, eh? <p>

"How often do you tend to drop by like this, Victoria?", real father Paddy asks after they fucked. <p>

"Oh, let me think about it," Victoria says,,,, "But, you know, honey, I am still horny like hell... after what we just did, and that's AFTER I've fucked 5 other men, with hardly any time to douche, too!" <p>

It's fuckin' romantic, leaving your sweetheart all broken and sad and horny during Valentine like that. And he's goona deny hir two "real daughters" his love? Man, what a cold-hearted bastard is this Paddy Scoury guy? <p>

LOL

Well, maybe not, but a damn good read otherwise. Like Risq, I believe I know what Vol 1 would have revealed, so perhaps (if we're right) that might explain her sluttiness. I've read that such behavior often comes about from incest, w/ her father molesting her. But, overall, I liked it, I liked the ending unlike some others, although I wonder (like others) why he would take a chance w/ in particular Aids, let alone any other STD. So thanks, you got my vote, and my "atta-boy" for what that's worth to you.

There were way too many untied ends.<BR>

And I noticed one of the comments mentioned character development - well, for me there was so little the story almost folded in on itself.<BR>

What were we told (or shown) about the wife? What were we told(or shown) about the husband?<BR>

The only person we got any real insight to was the father. <BR>

Nope, sorry, this pig didn't fly for me. The dates were buggered-up, and the idea that someone could have casual sex with 88 different men in the 90s and early 2000s and never once get any diseases is quite frankly unbelievable - especially when she obviously picked up men on any whim. Besides which we are given no insight at all into why she acted as she did.

Would you please consider an additional chapter where the rapist Father gets his just reward. At least that is what I got from the story.

I loved the story. The dialogue and storyline are first rate. Then, there's the description. Meaty, loaded with detail and imagery. Excellent, well done. Your work reads like a mini-novel. Only, I'm not sure how much this has to do with Valentine's Day. Nonetheless, it's always a pleasure to read a story that is so professionally written.

"O'Scouries..." lol, funny.

Ending felt incomplete, to many loose ends. Even after the divorce, he kinda wimped out. I'm sure he'll keep her around as more than just a fuck buddy, which in this case is less than satisfactory.

If you are going to get them into a tryst again, she was never really married to him, you are going to have to change the altitude you have created toward her. Great sex is not enough to hold her. She would scare me as she exposes herself, and her family, to STDs.

...

This is a Valentines day entry? The it deserves the zero vote

You did this surprise story very, very, well! I thought I knew what the end would be and then you shifted it on me about 180 degrees! WELL DONE!

the narrator is

Nice story with some interesting twists. Don, for christ sake: hire a nurse to take care that you get your medication on time (maybe you can even make here preggers) Ohh, I forgot that's a job you can't do yourself also.

Regards Umberto

Beyond good writing technique the story was not coherent I just did not buy these relations; did not get a handle on the characters and finally the ending was forced per the completion I assume. With your writing skills I see no problem in providing an ace next though.

Uh . . . I mean O'Scouries! Cute. You have inspired me once again. Now I'm in the mood to write a Loving Wives story. If you win the contest, I'm going to delete all my stories, and leave this site forever.

It was very entertaining, interesting and easy to read, maybe if the sex would have being a little less descriptive, you coul have improved the plot of the story.

Will there be a second part? Maybe just to know what the first book of the Diary says!

I loved it!!

That was absolutely the best story I've ever read at this site. As a matter of fact that was one of the best short stories I've read in a while. I could see this thing turned into a BOOK. Maybe a screen play!

I'll be looking for more of your stuff.

I love the comments that use poor grammar and spelling. Not worth the bandwidth they use. I figure most of them are just scanners who look for the jerk off parts and miss everything else. Super ending. I love endings with twists that make the reader go back and review the events leading up to the finale. Keep 'em coming. PS

It is obvious that Mr. X was Reggie who probably insisted that the girls come from his sperm (He is such a control freak). That would explain who could rape Vicki at will, why she had to keep Volume 1 under special security and Paddy's warning to the old man at the end. Of course, Vicki never loved Paddy since she never knew what love was. What woman could foster her father's kids off to her loving husband not to mention the potential for STD and humiliation (surely some of the 88 mem knew or worked with Paddy). Vicki's only defense is that she is a victim of incest and it was just sex. It never dawned on her that she did anythng wrong! >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Hopefully, Paddy will outgrow his dependence on Vicki especially when he keep getting reports on her lovers. The happy ending for me was the fact that the two girls keep their Dad (fatherhood is more than DNA!)>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

I found it interesting that so many commenters wanted to develop Vicki's character. Huh! Vicki reminded me of DGHear's character Zoe (another remorseless slut). While it might be interesting to read her POV her explanations for why she did what she did would not matter.>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Thanks for an Outstanding story!

SleeplessinMD

As usual, I find your incites very realistic. I'm glad that he still can see the girls and they don't have to go through life without a fathers love for them. It would have been nice to have them mentioned more in the story (to explain their apparent missing him at the end) but maybe it can happen in another episode. jim

One of the best! Well put together and worded so I cared for the charcters as people. The ending was classic. Thanks.

the obscenities and the arogance is there, and they hid behind the name . it all worked out - esp for partick, and that is what matters. charles and reggie certainly had an epiphany.

One of my all time favorites, just reread it as I needed something decent to read today,been a slow week on new stories. Thanks for this!

As well written as the story is I found it a bit spoiled by the ending. Paddy loved Vickie but couldnt live with her actions. OK. He divorsed her and the girls. I can accept that action. But he then wants to start getting together with her and also play father to the girls afterwords. If so why bother getting divorsed. This is simply acceptance of her actions as he knows she is going to be out screwing other people which as has been pointed out by others is a major risk. She wants him to understand so she is looking for help with her behavior yet he doesnt see that? He is going to be a dad yet can allow the girls to remain esposed to the pervert of a grandfather without busting him for what he did to his wife. My ex was abused by her dad so I know first had what this can do emotionally to the victim. Unfortunately or fortunately, he died before I found out but I never could have allow kids to continue to be exposed to him if he was alive. Paddy is a very bright man but seems to have lost his smarts in the ending. Would have given it a 100 but for that. mlh

I liked the story a lot. It was well thought out and well written.<br><br>I would like to mention just a couple of things that bothered me. The first is the need some authors have to bring in another female for the agrieved husband to fall back on. In this case, the woman was his divorce lawyer who is described as 28 (way to young to be considered one of the best divorce lawyers around) and drop dead gorgeous. Of course, the husband ends up in bed with her despite her claim that she "doesn't do men". The husband obviously is irresistible. <br><br>The second is the threat that the husband made to take his evidence to the jury. In divorce matters, there is no jury, just a judge. <br><br>The third was the fact that the first journal had the label of "Volume One". It seems unlikely to me that when starting her journaling, that she envisioned there being multiple volumes. I guess that she could have gone back after the fact and started putting volume labels on each journal when she went to a second journal. Oh well, the "Volume One" label just struck me as odd.

marriage should ever be considered an excuse for betraying her wedding vows and her husband. This woman was insane, perhaps even criminally so. If her father was the father of the children fostered off on him, it would have been much better to have sued the father for prior child support and alienation of affection. Let the father, and the daughter/wife, drown in their own pool of filth.

Great story, good character development, well written. <p> <p> <p>

Now the real reason for my comment. There is something drastically wrong with the new scoring system Literotica has implemented. About 3 out of 10 times when I get down to the five stars where I can vote my appreciation (or lack of), the stars are already filled in and there is a "Thanks for voting" statement -- before I've voted. Sometimes the score is higher than I would have voted, sometimes lower. <p> <p> <p>

So, if I'n not the only one experiencing this, the ranking of the stories is warped beyond reason. I've reported this about six times and never got a reply. So, can anyone here explain why this is happening . . . and not getting fixed? It is not fair to the authors who spend so much time on their stories and deserve a fair recording of their scores.

need a sequel.. real bad

your story touched me man. continue the good work.

Long time reader and a fan of your stories, I decided to revisit this story for ideas on the Valentine's contest. I have yet to write a story. This is a good one, though.

great story thanks for the entertainment.Mike from Texas

WOULD HAVE BEEN A MUCH BETTER SCORE IF NOT FOR THE WEEK FINISH

subplot. When do they get the medical treatments? Which other members of her extended orgy are also HIV positive? In this day and age, with bareback sex and multiple partners it is almost impossible not to have many STDs and HIV. Reading this one realizes the wife was mentally unstable, in old terms she was crazy. The husband for touching her after he knew isnt much better, but then again once you have AIDS what difference does it make?

...I have read a lot of your stories mr. Scouries,..this was my favorite.....really enjoyed it,.. thank you for many hours of plain old fashioned enjoyment....

Defiently needs a ending, great story so far, he needs kids of his own, please.

Would have been 100 with a little editing.

is do there are alot of loose ends to tie up.

for instance the fact that he threatened his father in-law lead 1 to speculate that Daddy wa the Mysterious Mr.X

Plus the Vol.1 Leaves alot of opennings.

as to who could be talked about in there plus they see each other and Screw the Day away leaves 1 to believe that there may not be a full Reconciliation but Unless he moves on

Friends with Benefits is surely doable.

VICTORIA PENELOPE SMYTH-WORTHINGTON O'SCOURIES

MY SEXUAL LIFE

VOLUME ONE

THE EARLY YEARS

still waiting to read it. kick Reggie's ass while your at it.

Very pathetic really ... But damn! A heck of a story.

you'r right Love really is blind and Sex has no brain.

well jim - what can i say? i loved it, and dna tests be damned. then again maybe he was bluffing on the stated paternity - probably not though. i'm guessing he had a fair idea daddy had done the deed. chinatown all over again. jw1

Great story telling and quite sad as well. The father thing bothered me, but love the idea of having them overcome it all despite that.

Good story even better writing

I THINK YOU GOT YOUR STORY MIXED UP BETWEEN REPUBLICAN AND DEMOCRAT KENNEDY-CLINTON-KERRY COULD BE THE FATHER!! HAS OBAMA-REID-OH YES AND MRS. P AND THE UNIONS CONVINCED YOU YET WHAT SOCIALISM IS OR ARE YOU REALLY THAT DUMB.

really had a Tourette's moment there... decent story about some screwed up people

and i beg you again to write another chapter!

Another great story ... but I want to know what was in volume one.... why. Thank you for writing such good stories.

id like a sequel. see whats in volume one and maybe even turn this story into an incest story .... fuck his non biological daughters in 4-5 years. lol. who knows with all the possibilites.

There can be a bond beyond the use of spern, and goes beyond the deceit of the adult. To care and be cared for. For her, moving on. He had the attorney and unlikely to be treated similarly by her. Ex can fill her bed and social calendar without him.

EVEN THOUGH HE DUMPED HER, KNOWINGLY ACCEPTS HER B.S AND ALL, AND STILL MANS UP AND TAKES HIS NON-DAUGHTERS BACK INTO HIS LIFE, BANGS HIS EX AND MAKES OVERTURES, MAYBE RESUMING THEIR RELATION-SHIP, WHAT COULD/CAN HAPPEN. ACCORDING TO THE AUTHOR, SINCE 05 HE HASNT SEEN FIT TO EXPOUND. TK U MLJ LV NV

So I rated it 1*.

fuck all of them, father in law, ex-wife, kids, business and everything move to Sweden and have your own kids.

I hope once will be mandatory DNA test for the husbands after childbirth. If the result of DNA test negative the mother should tell who might be the father.....

This women is not serial cheater, but she is a slut. The slut is dangerous because of STDs. This exhusband had to look out.

never dip into a polluted well

the ending sucked.

Interesting to say the least, well written, good plot, a really good read. Thank You.

hi mr scouries i have this story same as i read all other and liked it as well though would like to know bout the contents of vol 1

Had he fucked her off totally would haVve been 5 stars.

The wife in this story was a deranged slut who cheated on the man she "loved" throughout their entire relationship. When he announced that the marriage was over, she never asked why. The story deeply disturbed me because upon his finding out that his children were not his and that his beloved wife was not even worthy of being called trash, there was no outrage. Where was the anger, despair, depression or retribution? He acted like a robot and still allowed her to make him her sexual toy. I gave this story 4 stars which was at least 2 stars too many.

The wife has a sexual disorder. There are cases that people cant help themselves when it comes to sex. In such situations Love can and often is seperate from sex.

I have suspicions as to who Mr. X (the person who raped Vikki on and off most of her life) is.

In some cases of sexual disorder it originates from childhood wheree someone that person trust most had sexuall assaulted them.

In this case I think its a very close family member. I think Mr X is non other than Vikki's own father.

I applaud you Scouries as a writer and hope to see a segual or perhaps perquel to find out who is Mr X and the Father of Vikki's children. That is the only questions left unanswered in my book.

I thoroughly enjoyed this story, Thank You.

John

This is one of Scouries best stories. No writer I've read on Lit is more wide-ranging in his themes; and few write better sex scenes.

This is one of those stories that requires the reader to have a mind. There are many who visit this site who have no capability of logical or critical thought. Perhaps they should move to Texas.

In any event, this is a great read; at once sexy and sad, funny and frustrating, romantic and heart-breaking. Only Scouries can shoehorn such a wide range of emotions and ideas into one coherent whole.

Pair of this story is FrancisMacomber's "Born that Way". The diferent is between the 2 stories, that in FrancisMacomber's one the main character esceped from the slut before children and here the main character is in trap with bastard children.

If the children are below 4 years old the exhusband can avoid the children support money in the USA, but the children are older as 4 years old he must pay it. If the exhusband knows the biological father he could start lawsuit against him to pay the children support money and for the emotional demadge. However the super slut wife had so much sex with unknown male people, that he will not find who is the true biological father. I think if a husband will have a newborn he had better take SECRETLY to test DNA paternity, becouse he will not pay any children support at all after divorce and he will be free with all salary for a Second Chance woman.

Great story until the end. The wife got off way to easy. She would never have to worry about money with her family's millions so she and her family should have been made to suffer through public exposure. I also did not care for the renewed sex with his wife and the implication they would continue. Where is the punishment?

This is one of the most superbly written stories on this site,ever !

Thank you Jim.

You know there's one more vol in this!

This is even better than I remember it from my first reading.

take that set of genes out of the pool, the lawyer appears to be a better choice for a wife, the other belongs in a brothel