Falling Into Darkness Ch. 01

More please

Elianna it is a great start to a story.

Hoping you write more soon :)

PJ xx

Excellent start!

Not rushed, well written! You handle the distress of her experience well, and the comfort from Cael isnt overly stated. You've set yourself up to continue this story easily! Well done.x

wonderful start

great so far keep it up..can't wait for more.

beautiful

Such craftsmanship and delicacy of touch I am looking forward to following your work.

Good read

next chaptor please

More!!!!!!! More!!!!!!! More!!!!!

Good start,but it just the start.Must continyou!!!!!!!

Loving this

Wonderful start to your story, Elianna. I look forward to reading much more from you :D.

Cheers! Jida

ditto

I am not so glib of tounge so ditto to all the wonderful praise from those who posted before me.

ahh

great start!

This is a great start!

You described what Anna was going through very well. It's realistic and at a good pace. I'm looking forward to the next chapter. Thanks so much for writing!

Gorgeous

Absolutely adore this story so far. I didn't even care that there was no sex. I hope these two escape and the rapist bastard gets what he deserves. Can't wait for the next installment. I hope it aint too far off! lol xxx

oh my

wow.......can't wait for more

Waiting in anticipation

I can't wait to hear Cael's story as to how he's come to be in this cave. I understand the guy wanting the girl because he desired her sexually but I can't wait to find out why the rapist wanted to kidnap Cael. Keep writing, love it!!!

great start

Anyone can write a story with all sex and no plot. The only advice I would give is to put a tad more detail to your story. I recognize your story as one you've seen in your head, and you are writing it out as you saw it. Don't forget to include things like what they were thinking, where hands were placed, other things that make people see your story in their own heads. I have a feeling you will improve and become quite popular here. (believe it or not, more people here appreciate a truly good story than only sex with no point)

Well Done!

There is something familiar about this story line. Locked room, starving vampire, etc...
However, this is very well done and I look forward to the story developement!!
I adore the female perspective. Bravo for Chapter One.
Please don't make us starve for more too:-)

I usually don't read

stories in this category but your summary line followed by your writing style had me hooked. Great first chapter. Cannot wait to read more.

Nicely done

Interesting and well written. I very much enjoyed it.

A deliciously dark first taste.

Well this has certainly whetted my appetite. A very well written introduction which was different enough from the standard vampire story to make me anticipate the next instalment. I'm glad you spent time setting the scene and building the characters up rather that moving straight to the sex, and you leave enough unanswered questions to gurantee I will keep an eye out for the next chapter. I enjoyed the darkness of the story and the description of the feed itself was very sensual and erotic. I hope I don't have to wait to long to find out what happens next.

Very, very good.

An excellent beginning and I look forward to reading more of this wonderful story.

Great Job!

Love it. Got me hooked! Can't wait to read more.

Haunting!

Your story is amazing so far. Please continue the story. I really love it. You truly have a gift! Thanks for sharing it with us.

Great start

Your story is great so far, would like to read more.

Awesome Start...

I like Cael's charm and gentleness. And I, like some others, can't wait to read how he found himself in this predicament. Your version of the vampire is very refreshing. He seems more human than the norm, which is more than believable. And I'm hungry to go on to the next chapter....

"Sunshine" by Robin McKinley

starts out very much like this. It is a 2003 full novel in print by bestselling author Robin McKinley. I suggest you read it, it's a fairly good book--less sex, but no less the sexual tension. Good start to this story, I hope to enjoy the rest.

75

i think it is an intriguing first chapter, though i wish she wasn't raped :(

You are a wonderful writer

Please finish the story of Mara and Kierne. I love your style of writing and have read your total story three times. You are the best on this site.

A beautiful saga !

Thank you very much for this wonderful treat! I am done reding all of 18 chapters ! And Oh boy what a ride it has been! One of the very best i have ever read in any genre. I could not simply leave it untill I was done! The twists were heartbreaking at times, but I guess thats what made the ending all the more sweeter!
Hope you write such class acts much moree!!
Thanks once again!

I love it!!

I love this story, reading it for the 3rd time and it still gives me shivers!! i love the tension between them and how not ever page is a sex fest, the tension more than makes up for it!!

Loved It!

I loved this whole novel and couldn't stop until I'd read through all the chapters. You are a great writer; thank you for an awesome story. It had a little bit of everything :) You inspired me to finally write my first story for Lit.

oh yes

this had me hooked i want more ...more

Wonderful

I've lurked on this site for at least five years. Your story prompted me to finally sign up for an account because I wanted to add you as a favourite author. Amazing so far.

Makes me believe in magic in this modern world.

I have read each chapter several times and each time I am amazed at the enormous talent this writer shows. Each installment can stand on it's own but also fits perfectly with the story before and after. It doesn't get much better than this. Write more please.

PLAGIARISM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

************** EVERY DETAIL IN THIS STORY WAS STOLEN FROM THE NOVEL "The Night Inside" by Nancy Baker. ******************************


I'm astonished at how meticulously the author of this story has so thoroughly PLAGIARIZED from Baker's book, every detail COPIED from the handsome rapist to the melodic password the heroine half-consciously hears.

I think it's unbelievably STUPID of the author to have attempted such an imbecilic feat. Honestly, Elianna, it never crossed your mind that the same sort of people who would read erotic vampire novels on literotica would also have read a few erotic vampire paperbacks?

Next time, either put in more than a half-assed effort to copy someone else's work or do what everybody else does-- CREATE YOUR OWN. Or are you so unoriginal and desperately lacking in ideas that the best story you can give is someone else's?

Ignore the crazy one

I think your work is amazing and if SOMEONE took the time to read on they'd find this story has very little in common with Bakers. For a start Cael is nothing like Dimitri and the circumstances are totally different as is the rest of the story.

LOVE IT!! really!
=-]

I love it too

I love it too but could you now continue with redemption and the last descendant? Even if you kill them all in the next chapter - just give us some resolution can you?

Great story....tough start

Tough start to it...not sure how I got through it as a rape victim...but it caught me and as I read on I was sure glad I read on. Super talented author!

This Sucks!!

I think you have little to no imagination and you shouldn't bother writing another chapter...SERIOUSLY!!

This is a horrible, terrible piece of writing.

Please save us all and STOP writing PERIOD!!

how could someone say such a thing

to the individual that wrote this story sucks. you r entitled to your opinion. It is wrong for u to anonymously state this writer should not write anymore. I found it to be publishing worthy. Don't say such mean things. It is not constuctive. You sound like you r having a bad day. Dont take it out on the author.

Great Series

I think this is a great series I've already read this and I'm reading again because I love the series as a whole. This is one of the most creative version on the vampire myths and all I can say is MORE MORE MORE!!!

really liked it !!!

Keep going please I think is a good story just getting going, dont listen to lame ppl who are just cranky lol :)

dear the fool

To that vicious little prick who said this sucks... get a life. Quite literally. Don't you have anything better to do that insult people?

Captivating from the start

I stumbled upon this story while I was waiting for something else to load and I found myself unable to pull away. Your descriptions and dialogue make for an excellent start to this series; I look forward to reading more and expect that I will find it better and better. For a "first foray" your talent certainly shines through.

I'm going to read the next chapter now. :)

Terrific beginning!

I'm hooked by the story and characterization.

Sunshine

This is based off of Sunshine, by Robin McKinley, isn't it?

Pretty Good

I like it. Quality storyline is important to me so I don't mind it taking time to build up a bit, keep on.

The Motor Has Started

Good start, keep it up.

Feedback

Dark, but interesting. Looking forward to more chapters

This is probably one of my favorite stories on this site

Amazing

This is my favorite story. No matter how many times i read it it never gets old. Thank you.