All Comments on 'The Hazards of Menopause'

by brain_damage

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  • 96 Comments
bornagainbornagainabout 16 years ago
Fighting Back With Fire

She should Fight Back with her own Fire and countermand his Divorce with her own because she was`nt taking her hormone medicine because she feared for her life so she quit taking it she should see a lawyer and explain the problem she is having and what her husband did while he was married to her he cheated on her not the other around.how about an epilogue to the story.

Atlanta,Ga

AnonymousAnonymousabout 16 years ago
Interesting story

Why is it that women think poorly of men who watch porn and masterbate? He didn't want to cheat on herso he took matters into his own hands (pun intended). Just because she no longer had a sex drive doesn't mean that his was and her comments that "he demeaned her by watching porn" was ridiculous. How was it demeaning? In the end she got what she deserved...a divorce.

cageyteecageyteeabout 16 years ago
A simple but well thought out tale.

LW needs some new approaches and you certainly have offered a good one. I'm looking forward to seeing more from you.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 16 years ago
This was a great story. A woman choses to live

a sexless, loveless marriage, and shoves it down her hsubands throat so he can keep supporting her. I guess what her friends had told her that made her stop the hormones and the sex was their revenge for loveless marriages and wanting to make her suffer also. Bornagain is a nut case. First of all legally in many states lack of sex, wifely duties, whatever you want to call it, is justification for divorce. He didnt need a rew girlfriend to just recycle her. What must be clearly understood is that she unilaterally decided to all of the things including no sex. The pain could be controlled, her doctor could have pointed out things, and had tried to convince her that the hormonal treatment was usually safe. She never tried KY, Replenish, or a variety of jells and creams out there that are designed to provide lubrication for sex. I have known many women with ovary removal that have continued in normal safe and satisfying sex, without and without their husbands. Most decisions such as this one's are preceived notions and mental shutdowns. Bornagain is right one way she should have gotten her own divorce. Before she betrayed and humiliated her huaband, if she no longer loved or respected him she owed it to him to divorce and let him free. One might say besides being sexually ill she was very mentally ill. She got exactly what she asked for and deserved, dont try to turn it around and make her the victim. PC correctness in most cases is plain stupid, do you blame the spouse when the other gets cancer? Try to grow up Bornagain, you need to live and enjoy life.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 16 years ago
sadly a very accurate story

I had a very uncomfortable feeling of deja vû as I read this story. My wife and I had exactly the same conversation when she decided to go off hormone treatment because of the fear of cancer.

Suddenly I had no sex life - though my wife didn't begrudge me my porn websites and didn't belittle my continued sex drive. I have remained in the marriage for its other benefits and things are fine. But I'd sure love to get laid every now and then.

A good story well told.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 16 years ago
Well Written, and Too True

As a 57 year old man in a sexless marriage for the same reasons set forth in the story, I thought the feelings were well portrayed by the author. Unfortunately, the story is too true, thus painful to read, but misery loves company. Thank you for helping put things in perspective. That DOES provide some comfort while in a loveless 34 year marriage.

HarddaysknightHarddaysknightabout 16 years ago
Good story!

Menopause isn't just a difficult time for women. It brings a lot of changes to the lives of married men and requires more than a little give and take, and understanding. This was a very believable story.

AbbeyLaneAbbeyLaneabout 16 years ago
Struck a Chord

I almost didn't read this story because just from the title I knew I was already living it. My wife announced two and a half years ago that she no longer wanted to have sex with me - that she "loved" me but was not "in love" with me. I read the story anyway and the public comments and it struck a chord not just in me, but obviously in a number of others in similar circumstances. I'm trying to be patient, satisfying my sexual urges and fantasies by temporarily living through the literotica thoughts, feelings expressed in the writings of others. It's not totally satisfying but it gets me through another day.

Almost daily I question what real love is. I don't want my wife to have sex with me, just to "relieve" me. I want us to have sex as an expression of the love we both feel, like we've done so wonderfully in the past. Is it love that is allowing be to be impatiently patient, waiting for the sexual part of our relationship to resume? I don't know the answers - this is a story in progress.

bruce22bruce22about 16 years ago
Well written, and relevant for those who

are over the 30 year mark in their marraige. Luckily my

wife at 78 still enjoys making love but the problems come from my side. Good old heart medicine and diabetes makes

love-making difficult. But as long as we cuddle and do not get angry we can be happy.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 16 years ago
Very Good

As a man over 60 I can relate to some of this. Luckly my wife is still very sexual and enjoyes all of the things we always have done. Thank God for the little blue pills. A large amount of couples are at different ends of the sex scale from each other and this creates a lot of problems and pain. Communication and real love are the only chance for a happy marriage. This marriage had neither, so better off dead. Thanks for a good read, you have talent, please keep writing.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 16 years ago
Why wealthy men want a trophy wife!

You describe what obviously is a very common problem. Paul said better to marry than to burn, but what happens when we marry and still burn. It is difficult for a man interested in sex, in fact being driven by his hormones to want sex, to understand the wife who says she has no interest in it.

I wonder if men and women use these words to mean different things. I have no interest in maintaining a weed free suburban lawn, but I do it because my wife enjoys looking at it.

Even without the orgasm, sexual petting and foreplay is pleasurable. So what do woman mean by "not interested" in sex?

No wonder men look for a way out of the box

Shows how difficult it is to communicate in a marriage

AnonymousAnonymousabout 16 years ago
Hey, Abbey, Listen Up, Dude

That line your wife fed you about "loving you but not being 'in love' with you" is a classic indication she's having an affair. Happens all the time, Dude. You need to check up on a few things in your marriage. As for this "story," it really needs a lot of work to unscramble the convoluted line the writer wanted to follow.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 16 years ago
Great story of an all-to-common situation

It would be worth considering a follow-up story. Maybe she tries to win him back with the same gym routine and other beauty aids. Maybe she flaunts a new lover of her own, expands her sexual horizons, and makes him jealous. Maybe the new wife reaches menopause. Maybe they have a threesome or foursome. It could be inspiring for the senior set.

Vulcan_in_OhioVulcan_in_Ohioabout 16 years ago
This was a concise, excellent story.

Sometimes the best stories are the ones that ring true. I think a lot of men have dealt with this theme in their own marriages. There is a saying -- men give love for sex, and women give sex for love. There seems to be a lot of truth to that based on my observation of many relationships. I don't want to over-simplify, but poor communication in a relationship is frequently the cause of sexual as well as other marital problems. In this case, Mary failed to communicate her hormone fear with Jack; she even admitted she left out portions of what her doctor told her (some of which was not true, by the way). She made a unilateral decision about something very basic and important in a marriage, sexual intimacy and the expression of love. She did not give a damn (possibly influenced by her "friends") what Jack thought about it, nor did she consider his needs. A loving wife, one who truly loves her husband, would not think that way, and it is illustrated by the hurtful things she said to Jack when she caught him masturbating. A loving person cares at least as much, if not more, for the pleasure and well-being of their partner, even to the point of self-sacrifice. Mary clearly only cared about herself. Jack got the message that Mary did not love him when she said she did not want to make love to him (for a man, being cut off from sex is often a deal-breaker in a relationship -- we are of course not including such reasons as terminal cancer or some other untreatable condition). My only thought is that just as Jack got lazy about his physical appearance, perhaps he took the marriage for granted and did not keep romancing his wife. I'm referring to little touches when together, comments about how much he loves her, you know, the things women like to hear. It helps their self-esteem and reinforces their reciprocal feelings for their men. Men sometimes are only sensitive to those needs when wooing, that is seducing, their women into bed. The most common statistical reason women cheat on their marriages is the feeling they are unloved and missing the romance they crave. If they don't get it at home, and they have opportunities at work, they are vulnerable to men willing to romance them. Mary did not cheat at work, but it's possible her lack of love for Jack was partly due to lack of continued romance towards her. Instead of communicating with Jack, she simply chose to stop the sexual part of their relationship which to my point of view, made her a stereotypical, controlling bitch. She got what she deserved, but it's sad; counseling earlier in the chain of events might have prevented their break up.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 16 years ago
To Abbey

Other comment is correct,if you arn't haveing sex cause your wife is no longer in love with you, its time to move on! Sorry, but if she just stoped fucking you, she is fucking somebody. Male or female I don't know but you need to ask her and move on. Good luck! Great story!

AnonymousAnonymousabout 16 years ago
!

I can see this happening so as an 'untrue' story it hits the mark. The only thing that I have to ask is did the wife REALLY have to be so cruel!. Great story.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 16 years ago
My wife was 40 when she had her hysterectomy.

That was 38 years ago. The doctor gave her a hormone prescription for only six months. She has not taken anything since. She and I are still sexually active,(once a week) and she has no problems with pain or desire. She orgasms frequently but not all the time. I usually help her get wet with my fingers and mouth.

The doctor at the time told her that she and I now had the best of both worlds- No more babies but we still have the playpen.

I do not know whether this is unusual but it works for us. I might add that I would be in real trouble if this were not the case because she will not do anal or oral

iakatziakatzabout 16 years ago
It did ring true for me as well

A little too close to home as the saying goes. My wife had the same procedure and went off the hormones for the same reasons. My situation is somewhat different in that she has never denied me sex but she only does it to satisfy my "needs". She used to be a wild, multi-orgasmic woman who REALLY liked sex and would initiate it with me about half the time. One night while I was going down on her, she announced that I didn't need to do that anymore unless I wanted to for my own enjoyment as she did not get any pleasure from it anymore. She also admitted that nothing we did gave her any sexual pleasure anymore but she would gladly be there for me whenever I wanted because she still loved me the same as before. So where's the problem you might ask? My wife will have sex with me whenever I want and I don't need to worry that I'm pleasing her? So where's the down side to this? I'll tell you that making love to a body who is now just a willing receptacle and no longer an active participant is just sad. I feel so pathetic sometimes getting off in someone that is just waiting for me to finish so she can get back to what she was previously doing. I've withdrawn and we only couple maybe once or twice a year and I have resorted to the Internet and my experienced right hand. I had a short affair with a married woman and the sex was fantastic but the guilt and betrayal damned near did me in as I still love my wife more than anything in this world. The sad part is that the hysterectomy was an optional procedure after an ovarian cyst when she was only in her early 40's. The Dr. said that hormone medication would keep her sex drive alive and there would be no menopause, then came the hormone replacement scare. I feel like she was butchered by the medical community. She went back on another type of hormone to relieve the never ending hot flashes but the sex drive seems to be gone for good. I miss it so...

AnonymousAnonymousabout 16 years ago
Wait Until NICI sees THIS one! she will freak out

Great story. REALLY great but the usual MAN Bashing posters like PT 60 yr George Nightowl OR NICI will show up soon and attack the Husband. I think the funniest lines was this one

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<i>"I actually did still love him. I may have pushed him too far."</i>

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Think about it... the very next day after she emotionally killd him and cut his balls off... he moves upstairs. He actaully concedes to the Cunt that he IS a slob and is going back to the Gym.

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Now she has had 24 hours to calm down. So supposedly while she is thinking <i>" I may have pushed him too far" </i> she says this to him ...

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<i>...."It'll never last. You won't stick to it. I don't even believe that's where you're going. I think you're going to one of those Adult Video Stores to watch porn and masturbate in one of the private booths."... </i>

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That sort of evil loathing and HATE of her man is NOT explainable by Hormon depletion

Harryin VAHarryin VAabout 16 years ago
Calling Dr Laura!!!

Calling Dr. Laura!! Although I'm sure she is not very popular here at LIT one of the things DR Laura does do well is explaining and defending men's emotional needs/ sex to women.

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I remember once reading in one of her books that when you ask a hundred people <b> "what is the romantic?" </b> most folks give pretty much have the same answer. Surprise Gifts ... flowers... candlelight dinners... Soft music... Beautiful sunsets at the beach. But all those concepts are pretty much feminine ideas and when researchers asked <b> " what is a masculine idea of romance"? </b> suddenly no one has any answers.

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Why is that?

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This is a great story and it's great because it deals with how men relate to sex within the the marriage which is really a very overlooked aspect when these sorts of things to talk about amongst our selves or in the mainstream media.

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A couple weeks ago Dr. Laura got ito some trouble when she was discussing the Governor Spitzer escort affair. One on of those horrid morning shows Dr Laura was on a panel-- and the Topic was <b> WHY DO MEN CHEAT?</b> Dr. Laura took the position that sometimes a man will cheat because of the actions his wife are doing / not doing. Immediately the response from millions of women was harsh and visceral. It seems that many women watching the show heard her words as referring specifically to the Governor Spitzer marriage... including my wife.... when the actual topic was WHY DO MEN CHEAT?.

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That led to a very interesting evening conversation; I ended up having to call up the video clip on Youtube to prove to my wife that the Topic was <b> WHY DO MEN CHEAT. </b>

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It is a very commonly accepted idea that men do not have the emotional needs. That is why most folks cannot provide an answer to the simple question <b> "What is a Man's idea of Romantic?" </b> The more common view is that as long as Men get some pussy or a blow job every so often then they are happy. This story strongly reflects that.

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The critical aspect of the story is thw wife's unilateral decision and how she made it. Her refusal to discuss any alternatives when her husband/ life partner begged and pleaded with her... is a key. And when push came to shove she finally exploded in rage telling him know what she really thinks.

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<b> Her argument that she really loves him ... even though she think he's disgusting pathetic fat and repulsive is a more than little difficult to accept.</b>

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Therefore the alternate ideas expressed by some that the wife might go back to the gym herself or after going back on hormone therapy try to entice him back into the bedroom is simply not going to work.

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A true life partner and somebody who love their spouse would recognize that cutting off the sex suddenly and arbitrarily is going to affect him in some way.

EspressoBolusEspressoBolusabout 16 years ago
Your first Literotica posted story!

Congratulations of a fine first effort, or at least first post to this site under this pen name! You write well and have interesting, funny scenes. Please write often!

AnonymousAnonymousabout 16 years ago
An Impressive Opening Salvo

As anyone can see by the comments this was close to home for many - sadly for each gender. And I was among those in for me - the last 12 years like-able fallout.<P>

It was more than troubling then and now, for as someone else noted the closeness suffers greatly even though there are still strong feelings and history.<P>

Each is afraid to create the mood, comforts and the touching that once meant so much but now is a dark alley where no one wants to offend or raise false expectations. So the avoidance becomes the uncomfortable norm and life goes on, but not nearly as well or as full.<P>

Perhaps when eventually a mans libido lays down and goes away the relationship could once again bloom - somewhat in a different shape and feeling.<P>

In the interim, never feel bad for the self relief sought and healthily required for your own balance. It has helped me stay true to our relationship in hopes for more down the road. It also helped that I had no shame nor made no pretense of what and why I was doing what was being done to fill the void without inviting in another.<P>

Initially, she felt confused and awkward about my actions but eventually understood that while it was a poor second choice for me, it was a best choice for our relationship going forward such as it is.<P>

In other words Author, you struck a chord for many and most to come. And for a first effort you did quite well. I look forward to your next.<P>

With High Regard

indigodragonindigodragonabout 16 years ago
good for her mean ass

congrats on making your debut a winner.finally a story were the rotten wife got what was coming to her.not all men are cuckolds or too styupid to see the real picture. bravo!

roadbirdroadbirdabout 16 years ago
so all women

take this t oheart...if you cut your man off he will find another woman to please him....some women also like sex ...she should never have taken herself off her meds ...at least then she had a husband ...now all she has is a house by herself and no man in the house ....shes 51 try getting a husband at that age ...if she does he will be 70 as men her age as her husband was will be marrying women at 40 or at least a lot younger than her ...then when her new hubby dies in what 5 maybe 10 years maybe she can then find another hubby at 70 again she will be 61 ...a man of 70 will want a younger woman to watch and cook for him ...but at her age i dont think she needs to worry about going back on her meds as it wont matter as she will never get much sex again anyway...she might as well stick to what her gf suggested and live her life ftom now on as a woman whos sorry she fucked up so bad ...maybe she should become a coumselor and make sure other women dont make her mistake

darkstone57darkstone57about 16 years ago
it's too bad she learned so late

as the wife of a man in his fifties who suffers from diabetes, and ED because of it, i can sympathize fully with the husband. i am 51 and still have a very high sexual drive. luckily my husband has a very good way with oral, and i enjoy what ever we do. if i ever lose my drive, i have no intention of doing what that bitch did, i will find some way to keep going, because i love my man and always will

AnonymousAnonymousabout 16 years ago
There is an old saying"

Don't wish for what you don't want to happen because it just might happen.

peggytwittypeggytwittyalmost 16 years ago
Great story and a mature problem addressed

Well written and the subject was something many have or will face in older life. Well done and thank you<P>PT

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 16 years ago
Excellent

The only thing I will say is avoid HRT if possible,it turned my wife into a sex crazed woman ,it was so bad that I feared for her sanity[and mine].Thats all in the past now thank god.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 16 years ago
Good

As one living through a pre-menopause wife I can see this in the future. I good story from start to finish. Thanks.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 16 years ago
Wow

A total reversal of the classic cuckold story, I'm impressed. What is more impressive is that you made it work.

I only noticed one or two typos but that is much less than average, overall this was a really good story. I would really like to see more like this as the standard slut wives and wimp husband stories have gotten rather boring.

BRAVO!!!!

FionaVolpeFionaVolpeover 15 years ago
OMG

definitely a reverse cuckold story but almost exactly mirrors events that happened with a close friend of my mothers. In her case though she was not cruel and belittling to her husband (couldn't understand that part of the story. Did she really not love her husband? Was she mentally unbalanced from her ordeal?) and after a few months decided for the sake of her marriage to "risk" the HRT. Unfortunately during that time ( believe it was about 6 months or so) her husband had decided that porn and oral was not enough (WTF? That's a first) and sex was the ultimate expression of ones love so since she could'nt/wouldn't have sex then she didn't love him and he wanted a divorce. My mom said this was about a month after her friend had already started the HRT, but her husband showed no interest in wanting to have sex with her. In fact he said he couldn't put up with her emotional/mental instability anymore due to her "crazy hormones" on top of the fact that he no longer found her physically attractive and hadn't for some time. They divorced and he went on to "express" his love with a woman from his office who is 15 years his junior and many speculated he'd been sleeping with for about a year. The new girlfriend (soon to be wife, at her insistance) ended up pregnant and now he's salty because he doesn't want to do the whole baby thing again since he's been there/done that with two, who are now college age. Hmmmm...guess that whole menopause thing finally gave him the out he needed.

AnonymousAnonymousover 15 years ago
PLOT is is too big to ovecome

There is plot hole in the story. The wife hears/ reads that the HRT she is taking MIGHT be connected to Cancer. Her friends push and urge her to stop taking it. Fair enough.

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When she makes the decision and tells her hsuabnd about the side affects she does NOT tell him about the Cancer concern.

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<i> So, I stopped taking it. I told Jack, but I didn't give him all the details of the likely effects.</i>

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<b>why woul the wife NOT say anything about the cancer concern? </b> So the Husband reacts without knowing ALL the facts. He thinks its personal. So her outburst does double damage.

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second... Her reaction to the porn is Bizzare and has NOTHING to do with the story. Surely some of her friends that had stop taking the HRT Must have mentioned what their husbands are doing to relieve their sex drives and on line Porn must of come up in this day and age.

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so after the wife unloads on him Twice in the space of 5 minutes he moves out...

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so the next evening the wife says, <i>"I noticed you moved into the spare bedroom upstairs." He ignored me. "Do you mind telling me why?" </i>

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wow... Just wow

AnonymousAnonymousover 15 years ago
Interesting story.

She still go away with it without any real remorse.

Scorpio44Scorpio44over 15 years ago
Well crafted

Weather one believes HRT is beneficial or not this story does make the reader think about the consequences of our behaviors. She made some mistakes. The biggest IMHO was not involving her husband in the decision about HRT. It was his life she was dealing with as well as her own. She may have been married for many years but she was not a partner to her husband. Well done.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 15 years ago
be careful what you ask for

wife went over the top, and husband learned. she did not and is [un] happily in her situation. he acted she mouthed off; and she gets what she does not want, in all ways

AnonymousAnonymousabout 15 years ago
Harry's comments again hit the mark

How does a wife scream at her husband twice in less than 2 weeks <b>"You are pathetic disgusting far slob"</b>

...make him breakdown and cry then say...<b> "I really do love him."</b>

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Harry nailed this story with respect to the BIG plot hole.

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The idea that a wife married 30+ years could discuss the cancer risk from HRT wit her friends is fine. Saying that all those friends husbands had to learn to put up with IT is fucking absurd.

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It is impossible to believe in this story the friends of the wives never discussed what Husbands are doing about the lack of sex. Her reaction to the huband watching porn should of made her HAPPY... that he found an sexual release/outlet and leave her alone which is what she wanted.

bruce22bruce22about 15 years ago
Great Story

No plot hole, acting in a self righteous and arrogant

manner the wife tried to reduce him to nothing with her

crushing remarks. The result being that he found a new life with someone else. From the first line she is fully conscious of her own stupidity and understands the consequences. It is not a hole, it is the plot!

Many thanks to the author for his excellent work...

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Unhappy reality

I loved it because it speaks to what I have gone through with my wife the last few years. I turned to porn and masturbation as well to spare her my sex needs. I have been brokenhearted about her lack of sex drive. However, she has never been cruel or tried to humiliate me in any way concerning my sexual needs. I too tried getting in shape and losing weight to attract women. I did attract other women, yet, somehow, I could never follow through and cheat on her. She does allow me sex infrequently whether she enjoys it or not... Of course, I don't bother her that often because I "know" she is just allowing me to and is not enjoying it. That makes it very hard you know? Still I will not cheat on her as I know that she loves me; just as she has for 30 years! Both I, and I am sure others appreciate you bringing up this problem in a story. In your story the wife becomes cruel and nasty concerning her loss of libido to her husband. How very sad...

dreamcatcher101dreamcatcher101over 14 years ago
so cruel !!!!

i also agree with Harry and his comments...the actions of the Wife showed that She realy did not love her Husband and that they did not have a loving relationship..There was no real communication between them and the way She cut him down was just plain cruelty..NO way anyone would live with such a Bitch !! Talk about mental abuse,geeezzz.. I loved the comment that Darkstone made,now She sounds like what a loving Wife is like...I have to say my own Wife was not like that,that is why I divorced Her after many years of having put up with Her for the Kids sake..Total mistake?? YES!!Lots of regrets?? YES!! I love that He found himself a loving Women to to spend the rest of His life with someone that looks up to Him not down..My guess is He wont need the porn anymore..Good and sad story..And She got what She asked for,even to watch Him being loved by someone that cared for Him ..And at 62 I am still looking for my love..

RonRWoodRonRWoodover 14 years ago
Great!

Once again...Great! You write such thought provoking stories of the "Real" problems in marriages. Like many others that have commented- I live this life of little sex and a lot of porn inspired self-sex. I love my wife and she loves me, so she accepts all the porn I watch and the self-sex every day. Too, I have access to her without any problems when I want. Yet, the one-way sex act with her is not all that fulfilling for either of us. She says she does want more...and that she wishes she could find her sex drive, but we have accepted the reality that it is long gone.. You know what is really funny? She was the "Other Woman" or a trophy wife that was ten years younger than me when I married her. After the next five years and two children she had lost interest in sex with me at the age of forty, (Her age). I was miserable for the next ten years because I could not restore her sexual interest. I tried everything! (Without going into detail) Then, it got worse when she went through menopause at age fifty. She has just lately became willing to talk about any of it... That was only because I too got back in shape at 62 and started flirting with or romancing other women. I could not cheat in the end on her...and that was mostly because I realized that she did still love me! Yet, it is hard for me, because throughout all those years she had just listened to me moan and groan and never said anything one way or the other to give me solace or even anger. You know, anger enough for me to leave her and find another. She now says that she has always loved me and just didn't want to talk about it for fear that I would leave! Think about it...in all those years she never once verbally admitted that she had lost interest in me sexually. Even though her non-actions had me convinced! And even now she continues to say that she loves me...and I cannot help but believe her. So I assure you all...that the pain of knowing your loved one does not desire you sexually can be endured, and yet, it never quits hurting in your heart! I have learned one thing throughout all this though, and that is that your daily family life can be shared in many caring ways without a lot of physical loving and consensual sex. In my own case...my first marriage was quite sexual without any real feelings of love. I eventually ended it for this other beautiful woman that I did love and want. My second marriage? It was very loving without being sexually so. So what the hell? Still, I have had a long and adventerous life with beautiful and now grown children. I am now 65 and have to sadly say that I feel that I do not have the time left here on earth to experiment with yet another woman... I guess that I am just a Wimp! Wouldn't you agree? And...wouldn't this make another great story plot? It would hurt too much for me to write it myself... I am afraid I would make myself a hopeless Wimp!

AnonymousAnonymousover 14 years ago
Still love it!

I have just reread this story and all the comments. I agree with cageytee that we need more of these kind of stories that define real life problems. Problems that can lead to cheating husbands and wives. One gets bored with erotic fantasy after so many descriptions of the same sexual acts. Interestingly enough I got on a chat room conversation a while back and more women than men complained of lack of sex! In your story you mentioned the husband having let himself go. I have always only been attracted sexually to attractive women and I often wonder if men and women letting themselves go doesn't have a lot to do with the lack of sex between the spouses? One wonders with the obesity problems of today. I must admit that at 65 that I have allowed myself to become overweight after being fit and trim up to 63. But then, I have no one to appeal to sexually other than the literotica stories I read. As stated before my wife lost all interest in sex years ago before I became unappealing... So I don't really know what to think! Maybe there are in fact multiple reasons for a lack of desire for one of the spouses? I am looking forward to any stories based on some or all of the many reasons for a lack of sexual response from one spouse or the other...

BigJohn601BigJohn601about 13 years ago
One should be careful what one wishes for.....it might come true...

My wife did the same thing to me when she went throught the change. Unfortunately, I just had to turn to erotic stories to get my thrills. I think I need to find a Marsha.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago
Been there.

I know exactly how that feels. My wife cut off our sex 21 years ago and I still masturbate about once a day.

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago
LIVING IT

Married 42 years, survived my cheating & her cheating but the last 10 years have been hell. She had a hysterectomy 9 years ago and we have never had sex intercourse since then. She wouldn't take hormone treatments because of the same health scare. On top of that she has had 3 severe injuries and cancer and I was her care giver. She has given me a ton of grief over porn or erotic literature and became the church lady! She's been healthy for the past year and I've told her I want to resume having sex with her, this pissed her off that I didn't want to "make love to her"! I explained that that boat sailed awhile back like 9 years ago and we need to start somewhere. I tried for six months to romance her, kiss her ass etc., but she she couldn't because I now I have ED and I couldn't do it like she wanted. We got the Rx for the blue pills but she still isn't sure she wants to do it because I look at porn sometimes. I told her that for 10 years while she shut me down it was the only thing that keep me sane and that all she was doing was trying to control me. Well, here I am, me and my right hand! Should have never taken her back 15 years ago for the sake of our kids, they ended up OK, but I ended up fucked(no, I should say not fucked!). Oh, by the way the guy she had the affair with 15 years ago took a swing at me when I brought up that he was cheating piece of shit while setting with his wife at a local establishment. Big mistake! He got a beat down that landed him in the hospital, he still avoids me at all costs. And I only took one hit and the cops pretty much told him that you don't start fights with guys that can kick your ass!

saratusaratuover 12 years ago
This was a fine read.

I also can relate to many of the commenters here. But my cutoff came from a serious case of wife cheating, it's odd how we many of us have this common problem because of a female. Mabe their not so good to have afterall....... lol

UndrApprctdUndrApprctdabout 12 years ago
Bravo!

Way too common that wives have physical or psychological conditions which they refuse to fully share with their spouses, that fundamentally alter their relationships. I gave this story a 5; hopefully this is a wake-up call to all of the older female readers.

betrayedbylovebetrayedbyloveabout 12 years ago
SAD

Very sad story. Mary had a hormonal imbalance and was given bad advice about living in a sexless marriage. Jack wasn't ready to give up and despite being totally humiliated he improved himself and became sexual with someone else. Mary made a mistake and will pay for it the rest of her life. She was a good wife who listened to the wrong people. sad.

Danger09Danger09almost 12 years ago
Sad

I feel sad for the wife, but instead of taking her friends advice she should've talked to her obgyn about different doses or treatment options ; but most definitely she should've talked to her husband..the decision to cease all sexual activity should've been his & her's not just hers... & the way she crucified him was just unnecessary.....the husband wasn't doing anything wrong by watching porn & masturbating she should have been thankful... I actually pictured the sad look or the tears forming due to her hateful words while reading this story... She listened to her friends & she lost her husband... Her friends husbands are probably out cheating on them.... As a married woman I can't see myself telling my husband the things she told hers... I also know my husband there's no way he'd go for no more sex... But since I'm in my 20's & he's in his 30's I'm glad we don't have to worry.. I feel sorry for the wife but all of this could've been handled much better if she just sat her husband down & explain to him the risk of taking the medicine & also the risk of not taking it.. She should've been open with her fears & worries & they could've worked through it together... Communication is key in a relationship... By them being married for 30 something odd years I would think they have that down... I felt very bad for the husband I think he was willing to just let her be & he can watch his porn but she castrated him...wow what a sad woman... Like jack said now she can be happy single & sexless

AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago
Don't be so sad for the wife

First, when she had her menopausal start she took the advice of a friend over the Medical community-that was stupid and should not make us feel sad for her.

Secondly, as time passed she continued to rely on her friend's advice and didn't consult with an OB/GVN docotr-again stupid since her symptoms had not improved due to her friend's advice-stupid again but still not reason to feel sad for her.

Lastly, she became a shrew and completely degraded her long time husband to the was cruelly hurt and this was not just a one time incident she railed for weeks-extremely cruel, completely unjustified and the stupidest thing she did in her marriage but again why should we feel sad for someone who lashes out with such cruelty against the man she is supposed to love.

In Greek tragedies there is always a thing about the character of hero or heroine that results in their downfall, it is called the tragic flaw. It would appear to me that at the very end of the story our heroine discovers shas driven her husband away, he has divorced her, he has found a new love whom he will marry and our heroine is all alone and 52 (admittedly past her prime). This is the point we can feel sad for her but we must admit that her tragic fflaw or at least one of them was her consistent stupidity.

cueball961cueball961over 11 years ago
Short And To The Point

What a bitch! She deserved everything that happened to her. She not only cut off her husband from the sexual release he needed, she belittled and humiliated him which was not even necessary.

I would have divorced her sorry and arrogant ass myself!

AnonymousAnonymousabout 11 years ago
The Rest of The Story

Yes she deserved what she got from this little exercise in cruelty but the rest of the story is the self absorbed bitch sobbing at the end just shows one thing. Still being self absorbed and still a bitch who probably would have cheated herself if she had half the chance. I hope she cries for the rest of her selfish life.

TheGrimReaper81TheGrimReaper81almost 11 years ago
Hopeless

What a truly hopeless and stupid woman... *shakes my head*

monkcalmmonkcalmover 10 years ago
hahahahaha

Gather her tears of cuntness and share then on xmas as a fine wine from a damned bitch hahahahahaha should happen to all old cows, spout off enough shit from both ends become shit, and who cares what she wishes for them as long as she dies alone and in the darkness of her soul

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
Seems fair

She asked for and got what she wanted. She should be happy.

OverthefallsOverthefallsover 10 years ago
Well that sucked

Yes she got mad and said things she should not have. But after all those years, when she finally started to get help, she couldn't sit down and talk to him? She hadn't earned that opportunity from him? Sure she was a bitch. But he didn't help by taking his toys and locking himself in his bedroom. This is how adults act? I guess it was good for shock value in a story, but in real life? Not so much.

TavadelphinTavadelphinover 10 years ago
Hey Over - She did not let him -

She did not let him know why - she just declared and moved on

She did not let him work on the options together - she just went there

She did not understand his need for release still existed - she just condemned him for it -

She did not try to reason with him - she just humiliated and belittled the man she "loved"

He tried to work with her - she rejected him

He tried to work around her issues - she rejected him

He managed without her - she rejected his very existence and his manhood and his life -

He found a solution that met his needs and matched her demands - fuck her - ooops nevermind

Drbeamer3333Drbeamer3333about 10 years ago
Meh

I'm ambivalent about this one. They were both jerks.

AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago
Nar·cis·sis·tic

She became the definition of narcissism. self-absorbed, self-obsessed, self-centered, self-regarding, egotistic, and you can add cruel. DRBEAMER3333 I fail to see how he was a jerk. Until she attempted to verbally castrate him for taking care of his own sexual needs, he was supportive, was sensitive to her decreased then nonexistent sex drive. Right until the end when he brought Marsha their, or should I say her bed, that was all he did that was at all destructive to the marriage. But then, I looked up your favs, you fantasize about being cucked. I guess that explains it all. In your universe men are not allowed balls, much less equal rights.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 9 years ago
It's amazing

To watch someone drive the nails into their own coffin. She got exactly what she asked for.

GoodhueGoodhuealmost 9 years ago
Selfish Woman Got What She Deserved!

Whoever said that women's sex drive increases as they get older was full of shit! Mary is more the rule than the exception. My wife uses all the same bullshit excuses and then acts like I'm some kind of pervert when I want even minimal sex. I've moved out of the bedroom,now it's time to find a gym,and my very own Marsha!

AmbivalenceAmbivalenceover 8 years ago
She earned her divorce because, most importantly, she was a hypocrite...

Ok, admittedly, it was her body and she had the right to take or not take any drugs she felt, to do or not do anything she wanted with her body... it was her right to decide whether she considered the risks to be worth the gains. Can't fault her for that...

What you can fault her for is that he, because of HER actions, then went on to do what HE wanted with HIS body... and though he didn't (and likely in her mind was in no position TO) denigrate her FOR her actions, she felt that there was nothing wrong with treating him like shit and denigrating, humiliating, embarrassing, etc him FOR his actions.

What if he had gone onto regale her with how SHE was just a dried up old woman, a useless piece of flesh with no purpose... sure, it's overstating it but isn't that just what she did to him...?

"I'm fat and you're a bitch. I can lose the weight but you'll still be a bitch."

Seeker1107Seeker1107over 8 years ago
As the saying goes,

What we have here is a failure to communicate. Ok, he knew it was due to stopping the pills. He begged her to try something else. Instead she just went on to degrade him. So he watched porn and jerked off. She had zero right to belittle him the way she did. She truly did become a shrew and a bitch. Now that he has left her she can go to her " good friends " and tell them how relived she is to no longer have her mate of thirty plus years. It must be such a relief to them and her to never have to have sex with him again. He is better off without her. But I do wonder what they told the kids. Would have made for a good second chapter. Never ever paint your spouse into such a corner. Nothing good can come of it. To belittle him and attack his manhood as she did is almost unforgivable. It could only be worse had she done it in public. You can only blame so much on the hormones.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Second read, great flash story, but....

Danger09 and some others have made significant comments, some were like my own others saying that she deserved that he should talk to her as they were together some 30+ years. But he did talk to her. He begged her to try some other pills or creams or anything at all. No man is a mind reader, that having been said, her comments to him were the equivalent of a verbal Loretta Bobbit. Even in real life as one had said, yes, he should have divorced her. She may have spoken in the heat of the moment, but at no time did she even try to apologize to him. We have all seen in real life where marriages have been torn asunder for less. What I couldn't and still can't see is what her problem was. So he jerked off, big deal! As he said he hurt no one, he didn't cheat, he didn't degrade her in public, nor did he go after her. And yes to take his toys and lock himself in the other bedroom is fine even in real life. He still didn't hurt anyone with his actions, he just tried for some relief. She and only she threw down the gauntlet of him bringing a woman home to screw as she watched. She failed to tell him why she went off to begin with or that she had started again. This whole she loved him in her own way is and was a cop out of infintismal proportions. As he said, she meant every word as she was very emphatic about her statements. I still think that it needed a second chapter to show his side in more depth, how he got with Marsha and how they explained it to the kids. That last part was sorely missing. One thing though, I also feel that we should have seen some of these good friends who gave her all that really good advice and how their marriages are holding up. Or was she the only bitch in the bunch, I somehow doubt that it was all roses and sunshine for them and would believe that those husbands who were cut off wouldn't have been, if not taking matters into their own hands, then cheating with another woman. The one thing that really got me was the last line of how she wished them the best. That has to be the biggest lie of them all or at the least the biggest exaggeration on the planet. I wonder was she still so relieved about her cutting him off? Just my take on the situation.

betrayedbylovebetrayedbyloveabout 8 years ago
Damn

So cruel. She needed more than hormone therapy. She needed some valium to calm the fuck down. She brought everything on to herself.

fisheronefisheroneover 7 years ago
Words of destruction

The first problem here is that she listened to friends and didn't talk to husband.

Her obgyn told her risk wasn't that high, but still didn't discuss with husband.

Marriage is a union and that means big decisions are made together and discussed.

If they had gotten a joint decision none of this would probably happened.

My guess is that there were several divorces from those hens.

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
similar

Working construction and tearing up the NordicTrack each morning as part of cricuit traing program-stairbstepping-nordic rider-barbells-3bsets 45reps 45poundseach hand and breathingbeasy plus vitbE and lecythin-blood flow to penis exervise and kegels had me at 39 in great physical and sexual shape to go along with ultra high sex drive-wife kept right up with her perfecrt hourglass figure then nothing

Tried every reonnevting tool but to no avail. One night woke with rampant hrd on nestled between her two perfect cheeks. Slowly awakened her from slumber with neck kisses and slow breast massage-36D perfect globes whose inch wide nipples hardened to their full2inch glory. She shiftedso we could exchange soulvsearing kisses as my hand slid between her thighs. I could feel the heat and wetness through her flannel nightgown-yeah i know but she made those flannels look kultrasexy. Her legs spread and her butt lifted as I slid the nightgown up and removed her panties. Trailing my fingers4 to her nest I shift and just as my tip touched her shewent ballistic. Screaming andbthrowing meoff5 calling me a pervert. S4tunned i immediatelyely stopped but a fight ensued ending with me reminding her of all thepropositions i had rebuffed over the years. I told her i need to make love to her at least once a month she refused

I informed her she needed help but ifshe did not change the next time some little cutie came on to me i would not say NO!

Herreply-go ahead but if you do we will never hve sex again. She then bashfully whimpered Guess that is not much of a threat.

We had not had sex forayear and no I did not run out and look up those who propositioned me in the past. And I had a rule-I WOULD NOT CHASE OR FLIRT BUT IF FEMALE CAME UP TO ME AND ASKED ME TO FUCK HER, I WOULD NOT REFUSE. YEAR LATER IN LINCOLN MOMTANA GORGEOUS PLUS TEN WALKS INTO BAR. WE EYE EAC OTHER BUT DO NOT SPEAK leaving bar she asks if iwould like to see her place. Up until i was sitting on her waterbed watching her disrobe-i was fully clothed-i had no intention of having sex-THEN I DID.

THUS STARTED a 13nyear run wherein married single 21to 58 year old females came up to me and asked me to tske them. Most I had never seen before, all quite pretty and intelligent wwith fine boddies. A couple informed me that the word had been spread that I was THE LOVER. THEY ALL KNEW i was married and would not leave sons. Some knew my wife and her non-interest in sex

None had ever been kissed between the legs and I lovedbthat act.

All were repeates even if the front seat of truck in bar parking lot only allowed them to feel my tongue...they all gushed about fixation on their pleasure first and foremost. Do not get me wrong, many still left rebuffed-if during our conversations i found them to be vapid or arrogant or just no spark.

Those days ended. I took 5000 dollars to my favorite bar gave bartenders 500 dollar tip then paid for evrybdrink from eight until last call. Took my 3 favorites to motel for one last go and retired.

Week before we were to file for divorce wife got p inoperable pancreatic cancer diagnosis. Moved her back in with me and have stayed by her side. Have cleared the air, both confessioned sins-hers nonsecual but just as4 devastating and are pla3nning a vow-renewal

AnonymousAnonymousabout 7 years ago
Okay until the end.

Why didn't she fight for her husband? Tell hm her medical problems, explain the pain and tell him she had been to see the Doctor and expected to want to make love to him again? She just gave up. Dumb.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 7 years ago
So Deserving

She got what she wanted, more or less, he did for sure.

Tw0Cr0wsTw0Cr0wsalmost 7 years ago
was a common attitude many years ago

If you look at Ann Landers columns from the '60s and '70s that was a fairly common attitude women had in their letters.

At least one letter a week, and usually several letters in support from other women.

But most women that old then are likely to be dead by now.

AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago
I still enjoy this story after hundreds of reads

This story has always left me confused. On one hand she was a pure bitch who listened/talked to her friends instead of her husband/Doctor. Her attitude and comments were horrible. But I felt sorry for her at the end. I don't understand why she just didn't tell her husband she's going to the doctor to talk about the medication? It would've been too late of course, but she would've been fighting for her man. I felt sorry for him too. Especially the scene of him getting caught watching porn/masturbating. She refused to give him some pussy--instead of appreciating him not fucking some slut, she berated him for it. Even when she saw her words were cutting him like knives she continued her tirade. So, on the other hand I'm glad the poor guy is finally getting some pussy. He deserves it. This wife changed the marriage contract by deciding sex would no longer be part of their lives. I'm almost certain had he known she was going to stop having sex with him after a few years, he never would've married her. Had I told my husband this foolishness he would've laughed at me. It's not fair she decided his sex life would be over, no talking--just over. She thought he would be like her sorry excuse for wives friends husbands and just give up his sex life at 52. She was wrong. Her stupid friends was wrong.

AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago
Once he found Marsha ...

Many asked why Mary didn't fight for Jack. The simple answer is Jack was in love with Marsha and pretty much stopped loving Mary. Mary put in motion the events which made it possible for Jack and Marsha to form a bond. Once the bond was formed, there's nothing Mary could do to break it. She unilaterally took out an element of her relationship with her husband and was cruel about it. Sadly, she had the view that many women have, a marriage certificate means she owned her husband's pecker like it was a dog. Even dogs will turn on their master if not taken care of.

26thNC26thNCover 5 years ago
Paid in full

Really, really good story from ten years ago. This.One is worth saving in favorites to read often. Except for JimBob's two offerings, LW has been so empty that these old stories have become welcome refuge. You know the JPBs, HDKs, etc, but digging up a new author like this is a pleasant surprise.

PowersworderPowersworderover 5 years ago

What a great story. It was nice to see the wife suffer all the consequences of her self-centred behaviour. The husband obviously loved her and would have supported her if she'd explained... anything... but instead she behaved like a cunt and went out of her way to be cruel to the poor guy.

It was nice to read that he got himself in shape and found a more attractive woman. Putting on the show at the end for the vicious harridan was a nice touch, to show her everything she'd quite deliberately thrown away.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 5 years ago
My life other than Marsha

This is almost my life since my wife had a partial hysterectomy 17 years ago.

The words sex and cuddling do not exist in her mind. She is not as bitter and hateful but I am alone in our bed. She refused to take the hormones also.....so my sex life died along with hers. If I were as young as this guy I do believe I would have been gone also.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 5 years ago
EXACTLY !!!!!

Same situation without the vicious language. My wife never was real sexual,but, Menopause - then told me she has NO sex drive. She has said she misses the cuddling. Well, my drive is as powerful as ever at 63. Divorce is not an option. I now have 7 different fleshlights, (they are amazing ), I watch my Porn and take care of things myself.

cybojicybojialmost 5 years ago
Mine was almost as bad

Called me everything in the book. Kicked me out of our bedroom to never be allowd back. After a few miserable years I found some one else, she was always perpetually unhappy.... just couldnt use me as an excuse anymore. Bitch.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 5 years ago
At first I didn't think I'd like this, but...

I believe it really was a slice of life. Maybe not the part about screwing another woman in his bed, but having to put up with a woman going through the change. It never happened to me. I was divorced before that, but I've heard many horror stories from others. It was a good read.

jtwheelsjtwheelsalmost 5 years ago
Yes No yes good story enjoyed

Little different

She was trying to protect her health and side effects were not her fault

But

More communication before and during

He was hurt and just responded

26thNC26thNCabout 4 years ago

Reading again. This is a great story of a foolish woman getting exactly what she wanted.

brianelabrianelaalmost 4 years ago
A bit different to my marriage

My wife and have been married for 53 years an haven't been sexually involved for the last 18 years

AnonymousAnonymousover 3 years ago
Close to home. :)

This story is somewhat close to home for me and my wife. We are in our early 60s. After she went through the change she progressively lost interest in sex. She tried to provide for me, but since she didn't really seem to need or enjoy it, it wasn't very satisfying. We began to bicker and to grow distant. We finally decided to consult a hormone physician, and she began to receive small doses of testosterone. Wow! In matter of a week or two her sex drive was back. She also has more energy and is more interested and going out dancing and enjoying life.

oldmanbill69oldmanbill69over 2 years ago

Agree with what most are posting.

SunnyU2SunnyU2over 2 years ago

I side with the wife. husband should have been more patient

AnonymousAnonymousover 2 years ago

The wife was possibly the dumbest woman alive. Whilst she took reasonable steps to protect her health, she failed to talk it through with her husband; then insulted, humiliated and showed him absolutely no respect. That's the relationship killer, not the lack of sex.

Evah_Rheddy

AnonymousAnonymousover 2 years ago

Well she was cruel and i think the bitch must be a sister to my wife. And this is a true fact. My wife and i will be married for 50 years next february 2022. And for over 30 years she has treated me as tho i have leprosy in the bed. She is a very sorry fuck. I was stupid actually for staying with her, but i didnt want to go thru a painful divorce and i did what this story talked about. But no more, i am finally carefully getting my shit together, and when i find the right lady I'm going to make my wife a nice little video of how it should be even now. Then if she wants a divorce, she can have one ftom a pauper because i have worked to put all the posessions into a trust for over 6 years now and she will have her car, clothes, her sorry assed cunt, and very good directions to the front door. Living with a heartless bitch will do this to you.

MarkT63MarkT63over 2 years ago

Way to go Jack!!! Simple divorce, trade up!!!

AnonymousAnonymousover 2 years ago

"And there was no intimacy. He stopped hugging and kissing me and there was no cuddling. In bed, he stayed on his side. I realized that I didn't care. I didn't want any physical contact with him at all."

When sex ends in a marriage then physical intimacy of any kind usually follows as well and the couple become nothing but glorified roommates.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 2 years ago

I would give this 20 stars if possible. I would swear someone is writing my life story here. Heard almost the exact same thing from my wife, along with the belittling remarks, even though I have remained faithful and understanding fo 40 years. Taking the same steps as Jack to be free asap.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

OMG. I've not moved to a spare room or taken a mistress. But the wife in this story coul be mine, cold, cruel and selfish. Alas, I'm to old to divorce and move on so she cooks, cleans and spends the money. I mow, fix, earn and hope for reincarnation.

AnonymousAnonymous11 months ago

Bitch burned herself, how poetic.😈

IrishLaddy59IrishLaddy598 months ago

Always consult and research with a woman to ensure your writing reflects how a woman thinks and reasons.

AnonymousAnonymous6 months ago

I liked this story... it strikes close to home.

I've not suffered as many insults as Jack, but insult is insult. My Jan watches TV, takes a sleeping pill. I get up for work and she crawls in bed... and sleeps all fuckin' day. I'm defeated... regularly hoping a fuel tanker crushes our car and I'm out of her life in a huge blaze with nothing to bury.

AnonymousAnonymous6 months ago

The husband was patient, his reward... humiliation and insult!

Fuck her, now she gets to dwell on her decision. Her friends will be telling her she's better off. The husband's of of friends... are going to envy Jack.

nwaatntnwaatnt4 months ago

While I understand the wives fear about the medication and the cancer worry, but she also knew what the affects of going off the medication would be.

You would think she would talk to her husband about it and get the husband to go to the Doctor with her and talk it over discuss alternatives, even if only to find something to stop the mood swings.

I am male and don't know anything about medications for Menopause, but i assume there are some alternatives out there.

For this couple it was a train wreck

AnonymousAnonymousabout 2 months ago

Just a selfish, mean, cruel bitch, good riddance.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 1 month ago

Too similar to what happened to my sex life after my ex had a partial hysterectomy. The doc recommended the partial to stave off menopause as long as possible. It didn’t help. She still went through the stages and it became a fight to get her to agree to intimacy. In fact, on those were occasions when she said yes, I took advantage of it right then and there. Even if it meant me being late to work. Eventually she just became a hole to fill when I was horny. So I took on several girlfriends to help alleviate my problem and to get closeness with human contact.

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