A Broken Heart Ch. 01

You...

...have the makings of a good story here, looking forward to seeing where you take it.

Romance?

Ok, first I think you write very well, but I don't understand how this can go under the Romance category. He raped her for God's sake! I would never have anything to do with him.

interesting...

looking forward to reading more of this story... have read some of your work before & this makes me yearn for more... will she become pregnant? so very few stories here at lit consider protection, considering STDs and pregnancy issues... oh well.. this is fiction!

So-so

I'm on the fence about this chapter currently. I didn't like the whole concept of Jake raping her then comforting her like he had a right to. I gave you 100 because I like your work and I'm hoping that future chapters will make me like the story a bit more.

You make the same mistake that so many

writers do. Google hymen. It is not inside the vagina where you all seem to think it is. The hymen is outside of the vagina at the vaginal opening. There is usually a small hole in the center of it for menses. That is the hymen.

Love it!

I love it! Please i wanna read more and soon! Cant wait for the next chapter! Thanks!!

:) Yep

A very strong story beginning. I liked this one. seems to catch life even if spiced up a little with deplorable shady characters. That is, except for our 'heroine' :) Keep going. yoron.

awesome!

My eyes were Glued to the screen! I loved it!

Oh my gosh!

That broke my heart! But it was so sweet too.

Your stories always makes me smile. So cute. :)

Unsure of this story

Seems like a NonConsent/Relunctance not Romance. I don't consider rape romantic no matter where the story goes.

Not romance

Just a word of warning to all unsuspecting readers (like I was). This is not a romance. The theme of rape, control, and abuse continues through the final chapter. Having the author say that people are in love despite every action they take throughout the story does not make it romance. I'll have more specifics in a comment on the final chapter.

One other note: the protagonist would have been better off if he had been forced to give blowjobs to those men instead of being "rescued" by Jake.

Cyberwraith was wrong. This is a great tale

"the protagonist would have been better off if she had been forced to give blowjobs to those men instead of being "rescued" by Jake". U mean that its okay for her to be used by several men? Throught this tale Jake did try to force himself twice and yes it was wrong. But he redeemed himself in the end. He's possessive, some guys are like that, some girls hates that. This is a "fiction" and its free, go buy novels or watch some movies to your likings rather than asking people not to read this. And its still romance. It was heartwrenching and yet beautiful, so beautiful that you'll forgive Jake. All for Fitzroy, Heidi and Jake went all. Men like Jake are better than loving and tender men who sneaks behind their wives and girlfriends to fool around. I don't trust passive men. I chose to be a anon here because of your pathetic explanation on the last chapter, i don't want you anywhere near my entries.

To the brave anon

Jake did not "try" to force her. He raped her. Period. I didn't tell people not to read it, I merely warned them that this is not properly classified as romance in my opinion. There is a category for rape stories called non-consent. This belongs there.

This is a perfect depiction of the way many abused women will cling to their abuser because they "love" them. This is not love. I see the aftermath of these kinds of relationships every day. It never ends well.

As a final note, when you post things in a public forum expect that there will be criticism. One cannot grow as a writer if you only hear what you've done well.

Men like Jake are better than loving tender men.

Rapists are better than loving tender men. I shudder to think what might have happened to you that makes you think that way. Please, try to get some help, Anon.

Frying pan & Fire .

let me get this straight ..
Heidi is clearly very drunk / intoxicated
and
the previous comments are in regards to the advantages between

a) multiple serious sexual assualts
"forced oral sex on 3 men"

b) Rape of a Virgin .. who is barely conscious.

surely there can be No plus side to this whole situation.
it really is a case of
Out of The Frying Pan & Into The Fire.

Surely the Question we should be asking is
Why does she not go straight to the Police & Report these crimes...