All Comments on 'Callgirl Ch. 04'

Please, you write very well, but your plot is so unrealistic it just about destroys your story. He spends his wedding night listening to his beloved wife describing the sex she had with her pimp the week before the wedding. No man in the world could be stupid enough to continue the marriage after that story. Too bad. You were developing such a fine story, before you destroyed it in this chapter.

60 year old George

You created two characters that do not fit. As an author you are trying to be consistent with a square peg and round hole and yet make them fit. There are only three real possibilities. He accepts, she changes, or he leaves. There are then only a few directions each of those can take. It is fairly well written, but so cliche, and unfortunately I do not see the creativity in you to pull take it some other way.

Story is just about sex, same as marriage. He is such a pussy whipped idiot its hard to care what happens. Marriages should be built on many things but all this marriage has is sex, no chance.

The writer should abandon this effort and go on to something else after taking a few years' worth of writing classes.

I agree with George you didn't really have to let her describe what happened did you? but on his wedding night he let's her tell him about it strange man! anyway the bit about her being his whore I don't think so she is IAN's whore so personally I would get the marriage anulled but that's not where you want this story to go is it?

that he is still married to her? Chapter 1 started by him reflecting back to when he first met his wife-to-be some 6 years before. They started hanging around with each other, were dating in his last year in college and married shortly after graduation. So take off about 2 years, when the story starts, they are either married about 4 years, or have split up meanwhile. By what Ian implied at the marriage and the fact that she stayed a night longer, the kssing and groping and the way she avoided a direct answer, we are all to believe she again took up with Ian. Why ? barely a few days before the marriage that she seemed to want so much. Frankly, I definitely do not like her character at all. Even if she would claim nothing more happened than what she told him so far, I could nor would believe her. There's no reason to "tease" him, it's more likely she just wants him to "accept" her whoring again and uses sex to reach her goal. I thought there was more than just sex in their relationship, they seemed to have so much in common at the beginning of their relationship. But will it be enough for him to stay with her ? G.Belgium

Rebecca is a whore, Ian is a pimp, and Ethan might as well have a ring through his nose so that he can be lead wherever Rebecca wants him to go. None of the characters are very likable. As I read the story I keep hoping that Ethan will grow a pair of balls but that seems more and more unlikely with each new chapter.<P>It was interesting that as they were consummating their marriage Rebecca directs Ethan to pull out of her and to jerk off onto her wedding gown. His soiling of her wedding dress may be analogous to how she really feels about her marriage.

Anyone with this much talent must be addicted to male humiliation to spend all that time on absurd sick subhuman scum like this. He must need to be a disgustingly poor excuse for a man.<P>

Jaded and numb with but a few things to excite him. His own self disrespect and those who treat him like shit beneath their heel.<P>

What a waste but none-the-less a choice made long ago. How sad for those around you little sick one. When mommy and daddy find out won't they be proudly sick.<P>

My guess is that you have hooked yourself fore-ever-more sicko.<P>

Next will be sucking her lovers up then sucking her red swollen cunt clean of their stringy curdled warm cum plus raising her black bastard babies. Cmon liven it up cuckster.

Some of the conversation seems a bit forced but the story is still very interesting. I would try to add some more description, what does ian look like? Could you bring in some more of her clients and describe them? Things like that. Interestingly enough I am just finishing up a story on a woman that becomes a whore. It's not any better but what the heck if we can't learn from each other what's the point of writing in here.

All the elements are hear but perhaps the modern idea of

people enjoying being cuckolds is the underlying issue Again five for the writing but I am almost beginning to hate the story!

male. The pimp should have been asked to leave the wedding when seen. She fucked the guy while moving into your place to marry you. Yeah right and he just got out of prison. Where is the discussions of medical testing? She was a prostitute, the guy she was fucking was a pimp. Bring in some reality. Who in their right mind would fuck a whore? Get her tested, get her off the trade for a year, tested again, and then perhaps you could screw here with some certainity that you would not catch a disease from her. I knew a woman a few years ago who said, "you just take your chances." Never touched that idiot again! Where are the questions about pregnancy? Is she going back into the trade? Is that why the pimp is there? Or did she invite him to come over and help in the wedding night activities? There is no marriage here. She entered it acts of fraud. She lied to you. If you dont have sex with her the marriage can be annulled. It would have never happened. You can announce to your friends you found out she was a whore and got the annulment after her pimp told you about it. Yeah darling, I will tell you about what I did with all those girls after I am sure you wont divorce me for it. Did you figure that out? It says I fucked them but I wont admit it until I know you wont hold me responsible for my actions.

another cuck story i wish these guys would just grow some balls and dump the whore but i guess some "men" (if thats what you want to call them)enjoy this kind of shit

I honestly understand that this sort of thing clearly arouses you, but it is beyond terrible, and the protagonist pathetic. Will never read a story by you again.

A disapointing ending to a promising story. Well written though. keep working

There are those of us that have enjoyed your story. Don't let others keep you from finishing it. I say this because there has to be more. You are a good writer, keep it up

Don't bother with the chapter 5 either people. Comments aren't accepted and for good reason. There is nothing good to say! What an idiotic story.

Shit! Another 1*.

This isn't even a good cuck story. Just stupid.

Story would.have to work.hard to be stupid. It is well written though, if you are 12.

He broke the rules never get involved with someone more than 2# higher on the I io - 10 ratios scale! Stupid guy,

Like they say whore, today, goon tomorrow •. DazzyD.

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Just gets worse and worse. Maybe the author can save it at the end.