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English
hit me hard
Thank you so much. Reminds me a little of Charles Beaumont or an early Capote short. In my onion you really took this thing to another level. I try to over some constructive criticism when I can, but do not have it in me today. So simple, yet not.
I have read and enjoyed a great many of your
stories but this one is amazing. I am troubled but enthralled by the scope of this tale. This is truly a unique concept and you write so well that I'm impressed in spite of the discomfort the story has caused me. Congratulations on a great job!
Great writing but,
No decisions. Husband starts off the story running from the 2 lovers and that's it. Plot?? No. But Twilight Zone ending, Yes. Like one of those stories where they spend 30 minutes trying to figure out how to get out of a room and we were on earth the whole time. What's up with the wife, baby, the deacon guy's family, the church sermon? What? Were the deacon's family ever able to show their faces again. Did they get expelled for his public fornication and have to pay for the new baby and pay for his sins for 3 generations like the OT says. Will Rev realize the NT doesn't require him to be a wimp? Even JC got it on with the moneychangers. Did reverend ever get his dusty shoes polished? What?
good writing;
lame "story." it's not even a story; it's an attempt to have a RED HERRING as an answer to a two/three problems:
1. what do you do, if your wife cheats?
2. what do you do, if she cheats and has an accident and is in a coma and is not able to tell you how terribly, horribly "sorry" she is? and the biggest of all pseudo dilemma:
3. what do you do, if she's pregnant and you are living in a small hillbilly town with no 21st century medicine, so no amniocentesis can be done, and even though you have some operations, your doctors tells you although it is not likely you are the father, it can not be ruled out 100 percent?
ESPECIALLY given the fact that you've always preached to people they should froget each other's faults and transgressions?
lame hypthetical dilemmas, with RED HERRINGS, nothing but smelling fishes, as "answers."
not this time
I read your stories, as I have written you before. As I have stated, your stories are listed as my favorites. I still feel that you should be a published author, if you are not so already. You seem to write to evoke for an emotional response from your reader. This time your writing has left me with apathy. The dilemma that the husband faces, is superseded by the fact he walked away from his wife and lover in the act of passion, and the choice she consciously made to be a voluntary adulterer. We the reader are not given any background as to why she is with another sexually other than her husband. The fact he does not confront this dilemma, but chooses to turn and run away gives insight to his decision to detach himself from her choice of action. Once a seed has been planted, It grows or dies. What ever the outcome of her injuries changes nothing of her actions. The dilemma of the pending child that has a poor if no chance of being his, changes nothing of his decision making process, except the chance to save a life. To forgive or to shun, is a decision made by both fact and heart. Not enough insight was given through your characterization to help the reader to resolve the husbands agony. As all life is precious, the resolve to save that life is paramount. The consequences that follow, will always be shadowed by the seed. Donald J. McLellan Jr.
Bluntly put; not enough data
Well written story, that's let down by not enough information on why she acted the way she did. I second the previous commenter.
amazing writer
WOW! you are an amazing writer.
but the story is not for this site/crowd. but i still think you deserve a 100.
enjoyed the read
Interesting story line but lacked a little bit of crispness. This made it hard to follow at times. The concept was okay but but delivery a little weak.
There has to be a sequel
as above
BEAUTIFUL IRONY
BEAUTIFYL IRONY, O'HENRY WOULD BE PROUD
A different plot line with no ending. Chapt 1??
To me a good chapter one, but if this is the story in its entirety then it left me unfulfilled. You did a great job of writing this fantasy but left it all up in the air like a Saturday matinee serial.It is great to show us the delineation of the beginning, but there is no middle or any end. I personally find that not entertaining. Oh well, that is just my opinion, which also includes you are a great writer.PT
I liked it.
This story isn't about answers, but about questions. What does the poor schmuck do now? Probably there are as many answers as there are readers. No woodshed this time!
Excellent
Excellent tale! Very moving and full of emotion. I hope there is a follow-on of some sorts so that we can have closure too.
Talk about piling it on...
Not even Job lost his wife... Tom appears to have lost everything. I'd like to see a Ch. 02 where Tom does forgive his wife but moves on with his life and finds something better. Even Job had an epilogue...
forgive yes
forget no...even as a minister he can forgive but that doesnt mean he has to raise a kid that is not his...i think hes right to go after the other mans family to pay support for his transgression....as far as his wife is concerned he should start divorce proceedings as yes a minister can do that also ...and let his wife live her own life now ...if she stays in a coma then her life will be as it is and she will die never knowing anything other than she destroyed her life and others ....if she wakes and is paralyzed then she will have to make it on what she will get in disability....id say if the baby was bonr do a dna test on it if it was hubbys then he can raise his own child...if not then see if his wifes family or the mans family wants to raise it if not then foster care of adoption is also an option.... either way he can claim child support from the mans insurance...that would be a nice way t ohave some extra money come in and not really have to do much except feed n cloth a kid ...he could still make money off the insurance and from social security to pay for the kid...after all it was his wifes and the man was dead...if his wife does wake up and want the kid then she could have it...after all it is hers and not his ...he would just be watching it for 18 years till it could be shoved out on its own ...shoot maybe it might even like him...as hes a preacher she probably would unless she turned out to be a whore like her mother....then she would still be ok as everyone can live their own life unless she gets married ....then maybe history would repeat itself
Even the Bible...
lists adultery as a reason to put aside your spouse. It doesn't say not to forgive but it doesn't say you have to tolerate it either.
Wonderful!
Like others, I think it cries for an epilogue.
Is he the father?
Why did she do this?
Preaching forgiveness or not, do they survive?
These and more are questions that cry out for answers.
Good story
Good Story!!! Great narration, well written, Great subplot and perfect twist at the end!!! Keep Writing and throw some more sex into it and you'll have a surefire winner!!!!
Well Done!!!
Very well done. You have turned into quite the author.
Kudo's to you
With the highest respect
DG Hear
Extremely fine piece of writing
Well put together and as heart-wringing as possible!
Congrats Wetapap. You deserve a prize!
excelent
had me from the first till the last word. if possible lets have a chapter two. Mike from Texas
crap upon more crap
this is a fucking joke right?
How is the fact that the husband is a pastor minister in the LEAST bit relvant to WHAT the cheating whore wife did? Surely the whore wife KNEW her husband was a man of God?
More laughably the author implies or is trying to imply that b/c the husband took off at a high rate of speed after seeing his whore wife in a Deep passionate fuck session ... that the whore wife's pursuit.. that leas to her accident and Coma is somehow HIS fault !!!..
are you people really that fucking stupid to accept this?
If I rob a bank and some bystander Gets shot it is MY fault for robbing the Bank NOT the bystander who happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.
since the husband cant and wont and more importanly should NOT accept her cheating who cares if there is a 1 in 1000 chance the baby Might be his?
Once the Husband Knew and saw them he could of confronted his cunt whore wife.... he choose to RUN instead. That is HOW he chose to to respond... to leave HER and what she had done behind.
a follow up to this mindless story might be interesting but ALL of these "issues" have to be answered one way or another.
Excellent
This story screams for a second part. Please don't leave us hanging.
A Thank You Note
for everyone that has left comments. i try to send a personal note to each individual. some i have no way of contacting. i do appreciate the comments and wish to thank everyone who has taken the time to read the story.
Very nicely done author!
A good story with a hard lesson for a young pastor. Being a man of God doesn't mean that life good and bad don't happen. Wetapap described the conflicting moral issues this man faced and the pain of facing his own human frailities too.
BY the way Harry "YES" if you rob a bank and some gets shot or shot and killed you are charged. So you are the one who is at fault in reply to your weird example. But no where in the story does the Paster even hint he is at fault or believes its his fault. This was a blindside revelation.
Oh and no where in the text does the writer say if he forgives her he has to take her back. His pain is facing the emotion of trying to forgive him self for being human.
Thanks agin for the story
Papabear
The Greatest Story In A Long Time.
Wetapap has a masterpiece. This is the best damn story written and posted on Literotica in a long time. It has everything. The husband is a preacher, the pregnant preachers wife may be carrying her lovers baby however there is a chance it is the husbands. LOL There cant be an abortion because the husband isn't shooting blanks. The lover dies leaving no hope for revenge. Now the wife is in a state of coma and who know what is going to happen with her. The list goes on and on. I just love this one. David Allan Coe has nothing on this writer. LOL
Please...
I always find your stories to be the highest quality but, they always leave you hanging. This I am sure is on purpose but is getting old. Please finish the many that you have written before another one. A true fan.
You have heaped shit on a good man!
First an adulteress wife with a deacon of his and her own church. That would need to be announced to the congregation as they deserve the truth, no matter how nasty. Then the accident casued by her chasing him at speeds she could not control due to her own guilt. Dont let him blame himself for that it was a situation she caused and she carried out. Now pile on it the the fact the other adulterer died in the crash in her car, no doubt still not dressed as he didnt have time to. Then add the fact she is injured and will probably be paralyzed, do you remember, in sickness in health? Followed immeditely by do you remember forsaking all others? Not only is she paralyzed in allikelyhood but she is also pregnant and tiw ill be carried to birth. The doctor can test for viable sperm and get an immediate result but the hospital is to low tech to do and ultrasound and get a aminocentesis sample to compare DNA? Are you nuts? Or to do a test on the villi sample taken? this isnt real expensive and can be done by labs. Most insurance programs would pay for it if it was done to "check the babies genes for genetic diseases". He is right if the baby was by the sluthound, he needs to find out immediately and file on the family for the childs rights. Ultimately two things need to happen, file immediately for divorce and get depositions from the hospital staff on the wifes arrival, condition, the pregnancy, and the likelyhood of the childs parentage. To not do those things would be just plain stupid. A true Christian forgives and forgets, divorce her, forgive her, and forget her! As the doctor said parentage may wait until she delivers and at that point the court will take into consideration the custody of the child. If his, he could sue for custody since she has a dubious sexual history and it would be seriously difficult for her to raise the child. If not his, he could sue in the name of the child for his rights under the fathers name. Why do people try to make cheating spouse cases difficult. You commit the crime you pay the time, simple and easy.
As always....
Good story. Well worked. I can really understand how this man felt. And boy this has to be the worst day in history.
provocative
Harry tends to get a little high-strung sometimes, but writers ignore his observations at their peril. If you can get past the attitude, he usually has some pretty good points to make. And the point he makes here is valid. Why is Tom feeling guilty? He had an evil moment of wishful thinking in the midst of a life crisis that came tragically true, but is that his fault? He's not the one who was so wracked by guilt that she wrecked her car and killed her lover trying to somehow get to absolution. He also had a very salient point that wetapap needs to resolve the gaping questions left at the end IF he intends to move forward with this story, That said, this is a very well-written story by a talented and seasoned writer who knows how to play with the readers' emotions. Truthfully, if it was me, I'd leave it alone. Sometimes, some stories should not be finished; they're stronger if they aren't. Makes the reader think. I think this is one of those stories.
I concur with angry Harry
crap upon more crap
05/31/08 by Harryin VA
this is a fucking joke right?
How is the fact that the husband is a pastor minister in the LEAST bit relvant to WHAT the cheating whore wife did? Surely the whore wife KNEW her husband was a man of God?
More laughably the author implies or is trying to imply that b/c the husband took off at a high rate of speed after seeing his whore wife in a Deep passionate fuck session ... that the whore wife's pursuit.. that leas to her accident and Coma is somehow HIS fault !!!..
are you people really that fucking stupid to accept this?
+++++++++++++++++
As usual, Wetapap's writing and his ability to invoke --- actually, to EVOKE --- emtions were excellent.
But as a story, it was not. It was no more than a brief synopse in which we, as voyeurs, glimpsed the pastor husband being a voyeurs to his wife's fucking: even with God on your side, it must have been a terrible shock to see your wife's lips forming and "O" shape, as she's being hammered hard, while she's O-ing, look at you. And you are not sure whether her look was a surpirse, that you are there looking at her or that her lover's a really good lover, hammering way too hard!
But, then, Harry, remember not all people have taken introductory logic courses! When that's the case and people also grow up on red herring diets, it's sort of difficult to keep original problems on sight, as new and diverting ones are always popping in the rear view, driving that fast! LOL
Needs a sequel
I agree with Jackstraw, but I also believe that this story needs a sequel. Most likely the sequel will not be as powerful as this "snapshot-of-time" story, but that said, this story grew beyond a snapshot and became the "start-of-a-story". Bright Eyes and Stupid Mailbox were truly snapshots. Two of the best snapshots that I have ever read. This story however went beyond a snapshot and really cries out for a finish. Great story author.
Wow!
Damn Pappy, you shure stired up a hornets nest with this one! It's another very well written story with an outstanding twist at the end. Well I can imagine a few endings and I'm sure there are at least two for every reader out there. I like the way you ended it and left it to us, please don't write an ending.
One thing story may be lacking is...
A STORY! Does a laundry list of unsolved problems and mental questions and/or notes constitute a story? Other than a VERY subtle underlying theme of: Be careful what you wish for ("Goddamn her, wish she'd just crash and burn..."), what happens or gets accomplished here? Rev is apparently being tested, and what MAY BE several VERY subtle biblical and plot, double meanings and references (Rev going fishing, laying for 3 days, starting all over again, and possibly others) to support authors parable, what is being illustrated?
Ok prepare for long comment ahead
Wow, lots of opinions here! Well I might as well jump in here…since I have a LITTLE knowledge of this story.
Why is the Preacher breaking down?
Well let’s see.
1: He just found out his wife was cheating on him.
2: The woman he loves/hates MIGHT be crippled in an accident that he wished for.
3: She MIGHT be knocked up with HIS child OR the child of her lover.
4: And he feels like a professional failure, and feels like he is failing GOD, because RIGHT NOW he can’t forgive her.
Wow
Now point one we all can get so lets pass on that.
Point 2 now…. Well let’s NOT forget this story ends not 48 hours after it started. So he is still in shock. Heck he would be in shock from catching his wife in an affair NOT to mention the accident AND him wishing for it.
Chances are when he calms down and looks at it rationally he will lose that ‘guilt’ but right now, under shock, he aint thinking rationally.
One reason that professionals say that if you catch your spouse cheating, don’t make ANY major decisions until you can ‘calm down’ or for 1-2 weeks.
Give yourself some time to deal with the situation and think rationally about it.
Point 3: well TO ME, and yes wet this is hammering your old loving soul on this. This is more of a pile on than anything. So I will skip it except to say… Job didn’t have it this bad I don’t think.
Point 4: Think about it. He tells everyone “You have to have FORGIVENESS in your heart!”
What about if he counseled a couple that are having problems and said, “You need to forgive them”
Well now he ‘knows’ he has to do that… but being in shock, HE CAN’T.
So he thinks he ha to give it all up… he’s crashing emotionally.
Now a FEW points to make:
1: you can’t EXPECT immediate forgiveness for adultery…don’t happen.
2: Forgiveness DOES NOT mean acceptance.
Forgiveness, to paraphrase on old geezer I know, is letting go of your anger so that you can move on.
Doesn’t mean you have to take her back. You can divorce her… and let go of the anger so you can form a healthy relationship down the road.
Now IF he forgives her…. AND takes her back… How is she going to ‘make it up to him?” IF she IS paralyzed…they are going to have problems in their love life…
And IF the child aint his… there will a PERMANENT reminder of her affair running around needing new shoes.
On the immediate front, this story is a “what would YOU do?” “How would YOU feel?”
On another front…how can they heal? With so much in the way? Wet put us through the emotional ringer…. And then let us know there is NOTHING but more pain to come.
I mean IF he can’t accept her adultery and pregnancy, aint he abandoning his crippled wife?
It’s lie those really good old Twilight Zone episodes where at the end you have more questions and more stirred up feelings than before you started.
No he didn’t ‘wrap things up’. No nice neat little bows here. And friends… that is why we have such strong reactions to this story.
And that is why WETAPAP is one of the ‘greats’ to me on Literotica.
Ironic
Commentor are writing better stories ABOUT this story than what constitutes the story.
Pastors are human...
but I wonder about the vulgarity. I'm no expert; but at no point is he concerned about the use of profanity. He swears like a sailor on shore leave and why do people persist in calling a cheating wife a whore? Is she being paid for it? For fucks sake people, she's a slut. An adulteress even; but unless she is being paid, she is not a whore. Great Story though....interesting to see where it goes.
Correcting a mistake
Sometimes we can't see the hand in front of our face. LOL Mistake corrected. This is a twist, isn't it?
an editied post by Harryin VA
06/01/08 By: Harryin VA
I guess TheBullet ... ... has reverted back to his old style of making me-- Harry-- the ONLY bad poster/ reader at Lit.
Why is it that that TheBullet will bash me... which is his right... but IGNORE what Genghis Khan and Jack Straw has said...
...which is that they agree with me.
an edited comment by the bullet in PA
5Wow, doesn't Harry read these stories?
06/01/08 by thebullet in PA
This was a snapshot of a story, showing a man of God who is facing a tremendous moral dilemma: how does he react in the manner he has been taught and has been teaching is the proper way to react when his emotions are ablaze with grief and anger?
The fact that he is a pastor is the point of the story, Harry. So often you entirely miss the point of a story, centering your comments only on the adultery and the retribution or lack thereof handed out to the cheating wife and her lover, while missing the big picture that the author was driving at. If a husband doesn't react in a certain way and immediately, Harry condemns the story. Period.
But this story was about the emotional tribulations of the husband, who also has to filter his reaction to his wife's infidelity through the lens of his profession.
This was an extremely original and well-thought out story. We rarely get writing of this quality here.
i edited and reposted the following two comments,
without certain personal insults. i have already gone on record before letting everyone know that i won't let the comment sections of my stories be used for derogatory personal attacks on other readers. take it somewhere else gentlemen.
Thank you
You are a writer who understands and portrays human emotions better than virtually anyone that I have read before. The dilemma facing the pastor is almost beyond belief, yet when we consider human weaknesses, it can be all too real.
I deeply appreciate your taking comments that denigrate other readers off the board while letting those that do not like your story stand. That is integrity.
Comments - Humorous and Sadly Off Point
Masterful Author. Immensely calculated and played upon.
A writers job is to entertain and sometimes provoke. This was both -- and rare -- and well done. Impossible with steak but still rare and especially here.
It is what it is and most of all its done - in my mind anyway. It can't get better but can get worserer real easy.
Emotions aside [easy for you] many people have trouble understanding that like a football, basketball or underwater basketweaving game, the script is written on the field and involves real people doing unreasonable things beyond their norm. And thats life.
There was nothing unreal in this story - nothing that wouldn't or couldn't have happened in life. Do you think that the Authors intent was to make you think - ya think?
Do you think that would have happened with a pretty bow of wrap up on it?
An unusually deep and well expressed work Author. Be proud of it. I am -- of you.
With Very High Regard
about the emotional tribulations of the husband???
With all due respect, can't anyone, or thing, write soap operas full of cliched, unanswered cliffhangers? Plot outline for followup: AS THE STOMACH TURNS, CH 2: Wife wakes up unable to move because of damaged spine, BUT HAS AMNESIA and can't remember anything. Deacon's autopsy reveals he is HIV positive. His family and contacts may have it but it won't show up for years. Doctors say REV IS THE FATHER OF THE BABY, but it is at risk for the disease and complications and must be removed from the wife to survive, but there's a 99% chance the wife won't survive. The Deacon's family find evidence on his laptop he PREVIOUSLY drugged and blackailed women for sex. Rev wonders/prays, "Oh, what should I do? Get tested for AIDs, save who, run away, tell the congregation, wish for a hot fudge sundae this time, shine my shoes??" THEN HE CRIES, AGAIN. There I did it, feel free to flesh it out. LOL
Excellent Plus
My first reaction when I came to the end of the story was to say "Bastard". I was very excited about how the story would develop and settled back for a fascinating read. THE STORY ENDED!!! ********** As is, the story is complete, but it was in my mind for some time and still is in my mind. I spent the last several days working on a story outline which I will post in the next month or so. ******* I came back to the story to read the comments and couldn't find mine. As I headed the comment with BASTARD, I assumed my comment was deleted and sent an apology to wetapap. He said he didn't see the comment so I guess I pressed the wrong button.****** This story is so exciting because of the potential for it to go so many ways. Will the husband discover 'absolute love' and use this opportunity to grow in his faith? He gave up the opportunity to be a father out of love for his wife, can he find that love for his wife again? Will he allow the child to live? Will he eventually love the child? Does he have to give up his sex life if wife survives and is unable to have sex? ******
Why did the wife cheat? It must have been unplanned as she got pregnant. Did she loose her senses due to lust for a short period of time? A hint is in her reaction to discovery. **** Goodness, I could go on and on and on about the many questions raised and the many sub-plots which could be explored. Days later I am still excited by this story. The emotional punch is huge for me. I basically read only wife stories which deal with emotion, remorse, regret, and the positive. Who cares about a wife who cheats and doesn't have remorse - no emotional punch. Until this story, my favourite was Eleanor Rigby by HarddaysKnight - but only the first chapter. I felt his story should have ended with that chapter. My only story to date - Janet Cheats - will be left as is. I wrote two follow up chapters and had planned another, but decided that the original should not be expanded. ***** Sometimes you just have to leave the reader hanging and leave it to their imagination. ***** Wetapap, I really love your writing and hope you will come back to this story and let us see what your fertile imagination will do with the very many questions raised. However, If this is it for the minister and his wife, I can regretfully accept that. Let me come back to my original thought, I expand the phrase and say with admiration, 'oooooh you bastard, that was good.' *****
Sequel???
Follow up could actually out do this story's non ending ending by being more of less: How about the ultimate non ending ending: It was all a dream. It's so profound! It would make us al thing deep thoughts. Yes, this is sarcasm; I am mocking this "story".
Hated the ending
The story was pretty good though. If the guy is lucky the slut will never regain consciousness and he can put the bastard up for adoption or hand it over to the family of the adulterous deacon and let them deal with it. Sorry for the rant but I have seen adultery ruin too many lives to find it erotic.
hmmm....
very provocative. well written.
Well done
This was a very powerful story, well written and thought out. I really didn't like the ending at first but after reading it again I came to believe that this was the perfect ending. Even though I would really like to know how this story would unfold further into the future I'm not really sure it could be done without hurting the original story. Well done.
not a test from god
this is not the story of god testing the loyalty of someone, taking all away and woes heaped on him; then restoring him many times over. a cheating wife with a deacon no less, good person of god, hypocrit. there is
a point that forgiveness os a problem. does that mean having more to do w her (another's) child, perhaps not.
not a 1x thing and not accidental meetings. just sex, right?
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