All Comments on 'A Broken Heart Ch. 05'

by cellophanesmile

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  • 13 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousalmost 16 years ago
Unbreak her heart soon :D

Somewhat sad but a lovely story. I hope those two find each other soon enough. Can't wait to read the next chapter!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 16 years ago
Love it!

Love it! Great story! Please more and soon! Cant wait for the next one! Thanks!!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 16 years ago
yeah right

you know why she can't forgive or forget, because he raped her.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 16 years ago
Yeah

I love the story but realistically I find no where near close. My exboyfriend "raped" me and eventually I had to break up with him because I couldn’t even accept a hug after that. Sure he apologized, but I’d never forget the feelings I had before, during and after. But I love the story!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 16 years ago
great work

Okay! That was unexpected. On the verge of "and they lived happily ever after", we slam into the large stone wall known as "communication problem". And Jake is coming off as a controlling jerk. Don't misunderstand; I am absolutely enjoying the story. I just didn't see that twist coming. I am looking forward to seeing how you resolve the problem.

-- KK in Texas

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 16 years ago
Very good

I like the way you didnt make everything all 'happily ever after' for this story. The twists and turns of emotions on both sides are great. The only thing I would suggest is for a bit longer installments. It's so good that when the reader starts to get totally sucked in....it ends. Brilliant job!

bornagainbornagainalmost 16 years ago
To Controling

Jake was to controlling over Heidi and she shoul`nt have told him that he was the father of Fitz and there was no real romance in this story it was more like BDSM than romance i have seen more romance in other stories than this story and what about a DNA test to verify that Jake wqas the father why did`nt they sign a prenup if it was out of necessity towards the kid having a father than a loving family?.

Atlanta,Ga

Pat

bruce22bruce22almost 16 years ago
It is not clear that they know each--

other, except in the biblical sense! They have so little

in common except for Fitz. Strange Story . Well written

bruce22bruce22almost 16 years ago
It is not clear that they know each--

other, except in the biblical sense! They have so little

in common except for Fitz. Strange Story . Well written

AnonymousAnonymousover 13 years ago
sigh....

I think that's so unfair. he raped her and now he expects her to be okay with her being forced into a marriage? for crying out loud. if he's trying to get any sympathy here he's definitely not getting any from me. jackass. lol (i get slightly into stories)

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago

I love the "wild animal about to bolt" analogy. I wish you could have explained more about why he left (or why he -ish raped her in the first place) and why she never told him about their son.

AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago

Your story would've made more sense if she had asked him 'Are you going to rape me' BEFORE she slept with him. If you were going to play the angle of non consent/reluctance seriously, Jake should've jumped through more hoops in order to win her trust, especially after the callous way he treated her, and she would've delayed sleeping with him; has she no self-preservation? Unconvincing romance.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 8 years ago
A story that doesn't make sense in our world

Okay. A few things:

1. Heidi was RAPED by Jake, and was impregnated, there is absolutely no disgusting logic that he is the one feeling angry and why Heidi just forgave him with the snap of a finger.

2. If Heidi didn't see before (which anyone should've really), Jake is not capable of being a husband, let alone a father. Raping should never be planted in fitz's mind.

3. Is Jake kidding? Bipolar? Psychopath? Attempted rape over and over, and he thinks that she doesn't love him? I mean he might as well be Hannibal the cannibal and eat Heidi alive!

Anonymous
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