All Comments on 'Hot Bath'

I would have given you 100 but I thought you might have explained what made her grab his cock ; had she ever touched him before ? and to just reach out and give him a blowjob ??She could have asked him if he wanted her to finish jacking him off or something better .From a grammatical point of view , you NEVER say "her and dad", it should be "she and dad ". Looking forward to 8:00pm .

Regarding the grammatical thing... Keep in mind it was dialogue and I am not about to fault my heroine for a minor grammatical error, something that is certainly in character.

This was so hot and left me hungry for more. What happens next? Please continue.

good work .. keep writing .. you have got a great start ..

you only get a 25 because you gave no background info on the charicters what was there childhood like that caused her to jack him off and suck him and also i hate stories that are continued because 90% of the writers on this site never finish them so if you finish you get a higher rating but from now on try to write one chapter stories or make dam sure you finish it's the only way to get and keep loyal readers

His sister could not burst through a locked door, you said he locked the door. In the future watch your details.

Write a story about a guy who puts a light above shower that lets him watch bathers.