All Comments on 'Cheaters Always Pay the Price'

For writing in your second language, you really need to get an English speaking editor to go quickly through your stories to fix up the errors — none of them very large — but they are irritating.

Even allowing for the lack of English as the author's first language, there are a number of errors which distract the reader from the story. One example: Roger refers to his wife Rachel as "Nancy" (during one of her trysts in the cabin in the woods with lover Karl). At another point in the story, he refers to his wife as "Sandy" when "Sandy" is of course their daughter's name. Roger says he is not a violent man numerous times (actually, there was too much repetition in this story) but rape is an act of violence and it was quite clear he was raping Rachel during the last several weeks of their marriage. The idea of getting together with the wife of the man who cuckolded him is not original and it is in fact rather implausible. I doubt a lawyer would represent both Roger and Claudine in the two divorces due to potential conflicts of interest. Claudine would be seeking support from Karl in her divorce; Roger might possibly seek repayment of the money for raising Sandy, Karl's biological child (assuming Roger's absurd plan to have Rachel and Karl flee without Sandy did not succeed). Rachel would probably get a DNA test to show Roger can't make a claim on Sandy for custody. Actually, in numerous states, the courts don't care who the biological father is -- Roger might have been forced to pay child support and might even be denied custody! Most courts favor the woman over the man, putting the "child's" interests above all. What unfortunately happens in scenarios such as that painted by the author is quite different anyway. The wife sees a lawyer, gets a restraining order against the husband, and then gets hubby locked up for making threats, rape, domestic violence, or what have you. Roger talks a good line, but his revenge is like the Tooth Fairy, just fantasy land.

Way out of balance. I suppose the school just randomly decides to let one parent kidnap a kid over the other eh :) The real parents of the child would have no problem getting custody of their daughter, he would have no legal grounds, 24 hrs is not abandonment... and 35-40 rapes would quickly put him behind bars. Regardless of all the silly concepts... what is the value of the story?.. it is certainly not erotic, and the reader doesn't even feel good or bad for any of the people in your story. Wife cheats for six years... so he fucks her a few dozen more times? Doesn't care why, doesn't need any answers, doesn't feel the need to punish the asshole who ruined his marriage and took his daughter's mother away. Yeah, that's all normal.

Especially where the wife was called by the daughters name. Without a court order the school could not prevent either parent from taking the child out of school as long as both were listed on school records. You can move anywhere in the country you want but as long as you use your name and your social security number (no it really isnt confidential) you can be found, especially if the real parents get court orders to find you. Computer searches alone will find most people.......... He could have tried divorcing her for adultry and pushed the case of her being an unfit mother. Moving in with the other guys wife is an old line in stories and in itself isnt really realistic. But having her act as his wife when she isnt and having a baby together create a mass of legality questions. How about this one, two of the three children living with them are bastards, legally. His daughter Sandy isnt even his child, and the baby they have is born without a legal father. Then comes the questions related to medical history et al on Sandy. Almost like throwing a dead animal out in the summer, then going out three days later and not expecting to find maggots. Not really sure what revenge the exhusband got here except for throwing the trash out.

Wonderful story, lucsmith. The naysayers can kiss my ass. They are fools and cretins.

Enjoyed the story. Ignore the Grammar Nazis. Keep writing what you like.

who tell you this is a good story. They have no concept of what good writing is. All they care about is that a wife cheats and gets punished. Your fans are brain dead losers who call other people cretins and grammar nazis to make themselves feel better about their own shortcomings. Your story was repetitive and could have been a page shorter without much difference. English obviously isn't your first language, but if you're going to submit a story in English, you need to get an editor. Of course, not speaking English is no excuse for calling your wife by your daughter's name. But little details like that don't matter to the retards who tell you how great you are and call all your critics cretins.

a decent story-line not used to the full extent of it's possibilities. It needs the fear factor to explain why the two lovers abandoned their children just like that, otherwise the ending makes no sense. Just to follow this story, probably the lovers haven't bothered to contact the two girls because they have several children themselves by now. Once again Lucsmith, next time better. I'm not saying you need an editor, but it might be interesting to confer with another good author to check for too obvious flaws or for improvement. No need for over-analyzing though, that's not expected in these stories (or is this just my own feeling cause I'm not of English mothertongue myself). G.Belgium

This was entertaining, but it was just too far over the top on the custody, kidnap and rape scenarios. I have to at least find it plausible to buy into a story.<P>Keep writing as you do entertain.<P>PT

The English Nazi's really are right. An Editor can only help your story. I personally found the rape sequences disturbing. I guess I still believe that two wrongs never make a right. Your story entered fairyland when it came to the legal system. We all know that no court would do as you suggest. He really did not need to worry about the DNA for his daughter. Since his name was on the birth certificate and the world recognized him as her father. There are cases where the guy contested parentage, lost, then later DNA proved him right. The courts still held the guy responsible b/c it was in the best interest of the child! In short, your story failed the common sense test - your common reader will reach the end and say to him/herself, nice but would never happen.

I strongy suspect that had you worked with an editor, this would have been a 1st rate story. Thanks for your efforts, my comments are meant to help you get better, I respect your efforts, especially writing in a 2nd language. -Ttom

Or ratherhte writer lucsmith ,with his usual dumbassness did. So he had never been in his wife's work. Just what the hell is wrong with going there toi intriduce yourself to her co workers. Only a politically correct scardie cat would act like him. He seemed so unsure of himself it was pitiful. When I first discovered her and him I would have went in and beat their asses...Oh forgot...the dumbass forgot to take a camera even though he expected to catch her and him...and them they move away ...another case of avoidance..tell you what lucsmith why don't you avoid the site forever...we wont have to see your stupid stories...marriedwithballs@yahoo.com

The husband's self delusion and his willingness to terrorize a woman he was recently supposed to have loved are interesting. The grammatical errors were not really all that distracting, they actually heightened the sense of disaster the story built. The writer built tension skillfully. The legal fantasies the husband entertained reminded me of the Clooney/Zeta Jones movie by Joel Coen, Intolerable Cruelty; the plausibility is a distant second to the entertainment value. Assuming he had actually succeeded in scaing his wife away permanently, 'happily ever after' is the storybook ending he wants.

I often suspect stories which have random names in the middle for the main characters to be suspicious. Where the hell did the name Nancy come from for Rachel. And why did the daughter go to the bathroom in the restaurant yet the main character ask "Sandy" when the last time she made love to him was. Sorry, this was too sloppy to give a good rating to.

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My suggestion? Have someone read your story before you submit it. Another set of eyes could catch simple grammatical, spelling and character errors...if it is indeed your work.

If you don't have anything nice to sat keep your fucking mouth shut, or didn't your whore ass mother teach any manners. Scumbag!

Item 1: Get someone to prood read other than the reader. Typos and misspellings are too distracting.

Item 2: Story line is too credible to have been a passive observation. The title says it all: play with fire and get burned.

<p>Since you appear to be the only decent read today......</p>

<p>While the story was, well "different", something bothered me. The revenge was "way" over the top. And when you added this comment:</p>

<p><i>So as to accelerate her already strong desire to run away with her lover, I decided to continue to feed still more fear into <b>her</b> sick mind.</i></p>

<p>But your main character is doing things like this:</p>

<p><i>It was not my intention to make love to her since I didn't feel like loving her, <b>I was just using the body of the whore I now believed her to be.</b></i> "AND" <i>I couldn't say if she was enjoying what I was doing to her, -- I didn't care one iota if she got some sort of pleasure out of it or not -- she simply remained still and let me have my way with her bottom.</i></p>

<p>You gotta wonder who has the "sick" mind here. While I admit the wife ran along the low road for 6 years in the story, her husband forcing himself on her for a month or two before she left him is justification? Why not just a messy divorce? And the character is written as himself feeling he is a "good man" because he justified this as an attempt to keep the daughter as his after the divorce? I could see some mild payback, but this was just too evil for any human to do this to another, even in the name of revenge, for them to be able to sleep at nights.</p>

<p>To me forcing a woman against her will, to have sex with you, even if your mad at her for years of betrayal, is just wrong, and it just amazes me all the folks who found it entertaining?!?! She was wrong and evil, but its like having someone shoplift and your answer is to shoot them between the eyes for it. I wish I could like the story, I really wish I could, but the rape of the wife just killed it for me. Sorry >=( </p>

-Risq

Not bad. I personally don't really see where the revenge went, but I guess the story was okay. I did think all the sex was over the top, I mean personally I wouldn't touch her with a two foot barge pole.

Could have been pared down a bit, though.

This story was unevenly paced, poorly constructed and incredibly formulaic. This story was strictly by the numbers: husband suspects wife's infidelity; husband witnesses same; wife achieves fulfillment with lover never reached with husband; husband takes revenge which does not cause stupid wife to recognize that she had been found out; husband takes pictures and shares them with other man's wife; when illicit lovers run away, husband and other wife begin anew together.<p>This story was neither original nor imaginative. The reader was beaten over the head with the husband's rough sex with his wife. Despite the repeated episodes, it would appear that the the husband's anger was not assuaged by his forcing himself upon her. When he first actually observed his wife being unfaithful, I just couldn't accept how long he beheld his wife and her lover indulge each other. He watched through three orgasms. He appeared more "Peeping Tom" than betrayed husband. He initially was at a loss for what to do. How about pounding on the door?<p>The characters were poorly drawn, the story awkwardly written with no reason whatsoever presented for the wife's transgression. At the risk of irritating those whose standards of grammar are not as stringent as mine, 'lucsmith,' you should really enlist the aid of an editor for any future efforts.

The other comments scoring this as a "0" have said it all - the plot is strictly by the numbers, beginning to the very end

Hey author , i thought your story was interesting to read, and I liked the way you had the husband just fuck his cheating wife like a whore. It worked for me, I bought into the story, and enjoyed the entire tale...........Rich

I can see a man go slightly nuts after finding out how screwed up his world just became, wife a cheating whore for 6+ years, daughter not his.....well I am not a violent man either but that might just put me over the edge. I enjoyed the story, name shifting in the story always makes me wonder why, need an editor for sure. Keep on writing! I would even like a part 2, come up with something on how much the cheaters pay the price.

On the story line I thought it could have been much worse for her.<P>

It was written pretty well and the author seems to be getting better - more diligent.<P>

Thanks Author - it was course and crude just as you intended.<P>

With Regard

A good read, would like to know what happened to the wife.

It was not sexually pleasing nor was it a happy story. I know the world is not always happy but this left me sad and sorry that I had read it.

The writing was good but the plot was depressing and unimaginative. --wife cheats--husband finds out--husband brutalizes wife ,then divorces her and runs off with their little girl. not very erotic or interesting.

the Ct. Yankee

It has now been 5 years and come 7 years, they can post an add for their spouses and if they do not come forward, then they will be declared dead, I think. Both should check with a lawyer to see if their marriages can be disolved without any further action letting everyone go their own happy and sepperate way.

As the way he treated his wife by fucking her and not realy loving her, that was too kind of him. The story he told about the man at his plant finding out his wife had been cheating, so the rest of the guys put him in the hospital, well, he should have that done to good old Mr. Clarkson.

When it comes down to it, I really liked the story and to me, it was a little too tame. If I were in his shoes, I would probably had someone kill him and sit back and watch my soon to be ex-wife grieve over him. They could always plant cocaine in his SUV and then give him a Columbian NeckTie and it might have been chalked up to a Drug Killing.

bonnietaylor and her faithful idiots [www, needyou]endorse. Of course, Norcal Phil has his own issues and seeks attention although his delusion is problematic in nature. This author has put out a wide range of material but this particular story is the most realistic of the offerings.

With this story you have redeemed a category that has deteriorated to simply unintelligible drivel. You show that love and lust are totally different things, and that even though love can survive betrayal,trust is a much more delicate thing. So many authors don't bother trying to show real feelings and resort to cuckoldry as an easy way to write a story that is nothing more than pornography, You show that real feelings are what truly make a story erotic. Well Done indeed!

Need to work on your prose & pacing a bit, and although a bit formulaic, it's formula writing that pleases on an emotional level. Nobody likes to see a cheating whore "win" by being taken back by some spineless wimp of a husband.

<p>I just finished reading your story, so my impressions are fresh. I would ask that you please take my comments in the spirit of which I’m giving them. I think your writing has promise, though this story could have been much better.</p>

<p>The grammatical errors early on were very distracting. I would ask that you proofread your work more thoroughly, giving special attention to the beginning and ending. As a rule, errors tend to congregate at those places in any given story. </p>

<p>You need to do more research on your subject. There are serious flaws in logic in this story. For example, no school official would do what the husband/father demanded in your story unless there were a court order dictating such. Also, Kidnapping children is not an offense so easily overlooked by the law regardless of whether the aggrieved parties are adulterers, and Texas is no safe haven for kidnappers.</p>

<p>The only original element I noted in this story was the husband’s continued angry sex with his wife. That element was quite plausible and made the story more touching and emotional. Sadly, that was one of few emotional elements in the story, which given your subject, is quite amazing. </p>

<p>You also wrote a story almost devoid of dialog. How can we learn anything of the characters themselves without dialog? Everything is seen solely from the husband’s perspective. At the end of the story, we virtually know nothing of the wife or her lover, since we have never heard their voices. </p>

<p>I can understand your reluctance to express dialog if English is not your first language. Conversations among characters always expose cultural rules. But you need to add dialog to your future stories to give them more depth of feeling and characterization.</p>

<p>You also seemed to tidy up your ending too quickly and neatly. It was a useless cliché to have the cheated on spouses become romantically involved. As for the adulterers, I fail to see what price they paid. The adulterous wife never said she wanted her daughter with her. Sure, her and her lover went past her school on their last day, but beyond that there is <b>no evidence</b> she made any effort to find her daughter, or to regain custody.</p>

<p>As for the wayward husband, you have <b>not even given him one</b> utterance in the story. Who knows what his feelings are about his children. So again, I ask, what real price did they pay? Maybe that they suffered gives comfort to the narrator, but he has no basis for such claims.</p>

<p>This story would have been much better if you had given adequate attention to the issues just raised.</p>

This is an excellent short story.Some reviewers mistakenly chastize the author for grammatical problems.However, when taken form the point of view of the people that it attempts to describe , it is not so problematic.It is in the vernacular of a native speaker and communicates to the reader.As to the content, the husbands attempt at revenge while abhorent is in keeping with his character as described by the author.Unfortunately,the scenario is all too real as vast numbers of American men fall prey to similar circumstances and are forced to raise other's unwanted chilren as their own.Usually reality follows the plot of this story and they come to love the child as their own offspring.Ritterburg#55

Wow! You have got some tough feedbacks on your hands. As for me, I was impressed by the complex psychological warfare imparted by the husband at least in two fronts. <P>

In the first ‘front’: he engaged in inflicting fear and suspicion mostly by inference – nothing direct you could ever put your fingers on! First he talked about his friend at work, who had recruited his buddies and they all ganged on the cheating wife and her lover. Then at a different point in time he told her that HIS revenge on her IF she cheated on him would be very painful – not a word about violence. Let the deceitful wife make the connection in her own mind, between the story of the friend and the husband’s expressive, but not directly physically threatening!

Actually, I can’t remember reading a similar maneuver used in any other story I have read in Lit. <P>

In the second “front”: he used having sex with his wife, in fact, much more and more varied sex as his revenge! Thinking of how little room for maneuvering the husband had – he played (and bluffed) with the few cards he had admirably. He chose ‘not to know’ his daughter’s biological father (as he wanted to keep an equal chance for custody), he played the border line rough and increasingly demanding and kept his wife off balance by surprise demands and dark hints. He chose making love as his weapon of choice and it has a poetic justice to it. Just like the wife allowed the marriage to be destroyed and hurt her husband through deceitful sexual relations, so does the husband engages now with her in deceitful “love making”. Yes, he was not gentle and loving with her, but the wife could have called the police if indeed she felt she was indeed being raped. In fact she preferred to sell her body (initially for pretences of safety in the marriage and later on for perhaps buying more time till she finds some other solution). But now that the husband was on to her deceit and kept her suspecting but not quite sure that he knew – he could take his revenge on her directly in the bedroom, using sex on her the same way she used sex on him. Only he shows her that for him she turned from a loving wife into a despised (and soon disposable) sex object. None would have happened if she had not preceded him with her disrespect.<P>

Rest assured that at least you have satisfied (and exceeded) the expectations of this reader.

As stated in another post, it is getting old that the cheated on spouses get together. That rarely happens. Often these parties harbor resentment towards each other also. In a way they tend to blame the other for not keeping their spouse happy thus making that person pursue their spouse. That's another part of it, more often than not, these parties tend to blame the other person for the relationship, not their spouse. In their mind, their spouse is the one who is desirable and the other person is stealing what is theirs.

In a way your story went the other way. You put all the blame on the cheating wife. Yes she was desirable but the other man was more desirable than the husband and evidently as you alluded to mildly that he was better hung.

Another reason the cheated on spouses rarely get together is that seeing them reminds them of the pain they feel or felt. It makes it harder to move on.

OK, enough of that, the cheated on spouses rarely get together for many reasons.

Now, as also specified by another poster, a school can not deny the parent the right to pick up their child. Only when they have a court order telling them not to would they not allow the parent to pick up their child. In fact, without a court order, even a policeman would bar a parent from obtaining physical custody of their child. A judge would not grant that order without significant evidence that the parent is a danger to the child. SO we are clear on that.

I understand the reasoning for these errors in the story line. The idea was for the husband to walk away the winner. He gets the hot wife of the man cheating with his wife so that makes him even. By also getting the daughter and then having another baby with this woman, we are given the idea that he is like Job from the bible. While he lost his family, he got better. It's just not very believable.

Now to the writing itself. In some parts it was great, but in other areas, you spent too much time setting up the situation. Instead of being enthralled and wanting to read more, I found myself skimming many paragraphs while thinking, "get to the point".

Still it wasn't a bad read.

What bull. He was a rapist. What could have been a good story was ruined by him raping his wife. All this time he kept saying that he wasn't violent. Then he said that if she once said that she did not want it he would stop. First he says that when he was fucking her fear would be in her eyes. Hmmmmmm, that would be a tip off that he was going overboard. Then, when he took her out to eat, she came right out and told him that he was raping her. Gee whiz Goober, I think that sort of said that she did not want it. There is something drastically wrong with you if you believe that rape is not violent. While I hate cheaters, I hate rapists and those who abuse children even more.

used her. She was taken. She said no to a few things but then gave in and had what amounts to consensual sex. The woman was a cheat and a liar. She cared not for her child she had by another man, and her lover had no real love for either of his children, there is no revange there. The wife should have sued for ownership of the pharmacy........ I am sure there are a few PC people out there screaming for reconciliation and taking the slut back. While most of us are surprised she is still alive at all she and her lover would make excellent pig food....

A very different thing. IT is indicated that both of them paid the price by not being with their daughters. One could also say they got what they wanted. Someone else to raise the two girls and them the freedom they wanted. After all he left his wife and in no way acted to take his child. They did drive by the school but didnt stop so that was but a fleeting act. My guess is the loser was the one that raised two children they he knew belonged to another man! The other wife lives with him as his wife, in Texas if they register the marriage they would be married under common law. A few years ago just living as husband and wife would make them married. One day the insurance company, or the IRS, or social security will throw a monkey wrench in this "marriage" and then expose both of them to possible fraud charges. One can say in this story the winners were the slut adulterer and her partner, they ran off into the sunset with no real obligations. At any time one of them can step in and take the daughter away. It is easy enough, you didnt say he changed his SS number, a good detective could find him, and have you ever tried to locate someone on the internet, it is very easy in some cases.

This story is believable, and it has a happy ending for the better halves of the two previous families. The story is hard to read, but in the end I had a good feeling about the outcome. Yet I think many reader will ask the question I ask - what did happen to Rachel and her pharmacists? The author could, and I think should, add a chapter describing what happened to Rachel and her boyfriend. Perhaps a confrontation between the two couples could take place. RAG

Thanks for an outstanding story. I loved it.

Just found this in the Cheating Wives' section. Both chapters were enjoyable to read, even if I saw the end coming,with the two cheated partners getting together ! I'll be reading more of your stories, it'll be hard to top this story though. Keep on writing !

Partner swapping seems to happen now and then. Rachel and Karl are probably happy together, but miss their kids.

His stupidity seems to have no bounds. Should not so called "authors" first learn how to write?? Some obviously don't. Worst crap I ever skipped thru!!!!!

really

Just like the FLAG. Don't fuck with me WIMP ASS. the previous comment, was written by a wimp..

Write a second part. At the end when you said that they haven't heard from the adulterers in years and that they paid the price...what price did they pay? They could be living happily ever after for all we know. That shouldn't have happened. They should have been made to pay for the pain they caused their spouses. They should be suffering. They also should have been taken to the cleaners and left on the street. They don't deserve an ounce of happiness and them not calling means that they are probably happy and probably made a family of their own. They can't get away with this and I ask you please make a second to where they actually do pay. Like, make their lives miserable with each other an have them come back to their spouses only to be rebuffed. I personally prefered if you would have had the husband beat up the guys first chance he saw. Like when he actually caught them doing. And also I would have loved for the lover's wife to let him know the she knew and kicked him repeatedly in his lower region. Please, if you want but would be much appreciated, make a second and make the lovers hurt so badly that they wished they had thought twice about what they did.Make.Them. Hurt.Please?

It had potential. But somehow it failed to aspire to what it could be. You wasted a lot of words on describing sex which could have been put into story. He seemed very passive as a man except for raping his wife.

6 years and never visited the pharmacy that his wife works at! Really! How unlikely it that?

It wouldn't matter if the house was only in his name. He couldn't sell the house without providing title insurance and, without his wife's signature, the deed is going to state "Name, a single person" so signing it would be fraud. Regardless, no title company would issue title insurance without a wife's signature.

And, the claim that she abandoned his and his daughter is nonsense. Possibly after 12 to 18 months but certainly not after a few days.

Finally, when the wife returned and the child is gone, she would go to court and get temporary custody and he would be charged with kidnapping for the purpose of finding him and the child. That charge would be dropped in found quickly. If not, she would get a divorce and be granted custody.

There is no way that he could get a new identity with a new SSN, since that would require a birth certificate, a driver license or other similar ID, and an interview at the social security office. And, the social security administration would verify the birth certificat with the issuing agency so a fake would not work. And, to obtain a delayed birth certificate would, amoungst other things, require school or similar records from before the age of ten.

He could not use the birth certificate of a dead person because it would be stamped deceased and the SSN would also show deceased. And, he could not assume someone's identity because there is no way to obtain the SSN of a live person and, even if he could, to open a bank would require the SSN and any money her earned would be reported to the IRS under that SSN. Even, if he build houses, he would have to get loans requiring an SSN and he is going to hire sub-contractors and file forms requiring SSNs of the sub-contractors. And, even if he had enough money to build the first house, if he doesn't file the forms, that is going to be discovered when the sub-contractors file their income tax returns. Therefore, he would go to prison for income tax evasion in addition to kidnapping.

Also, he couldn't enroll the children in school using this names and SSNs since that would lead the law right to them. And, obtaining delayed birth certificate for the children would require their old school records that would not exist. And, new SSNs would be even more difficult.

And, it is highly doubtful that he could have taken photos and a video, let alone hear what they were saying since, with air conditioning leaves their windows closed and, even if in the unlikely event, the drapes were closed, the inside would be much darker than the outside so the window would act as a one-way mirror in which you could see out but you could not see in.

The story is impossible in so many ways that it has no redeaming value even as a rewrite.

sometimes bears fruit and comes to fruitation, TK U MLJ LV NV

and I still think it was great!

The story is a bit stirring, but overall, it's really too rough to do its plot justice. I'm not referring to grammatical errors. The entire story feels rushed, as if the author was trying to get everything typed before it was gone. There are a few good concepts that should have been expanded upon, and a few others that were best simply mentioned without detail. Still, the story and the author show potential.

The husband can't understand why his wife could ever believe him to be capable of violence, yet he rapes her every chance he gets. These portrayals of husbands give all guys a bad name.

He rapes her repeatedly but he's not violent? I think you need to learn the definition of violence, yes she cheated on him, but no woman, or man for that matter deserves to be raped for ANY reason you sick fuck!!!!!

It took Roger a long time to figure out that his loving wife was nothing but a slut whore. The rough sex he began having with her was justified because he was claiming what was rightfully his. If the slut believed he was raping her she could have put a stop to it, but didn't. He was one step ahead of the cheaters and in the end he and the cheating dickhead's wife got together and formed a better and more loving family. With any luck the 2 asshole cheaters who took off died a horrible death in a massive one car accident. Yeah I would like that.

Good story!

liked the way he worked on the wife and got her to run away. and unless she said no it wasn't a rape. glad he took what was his - glad he got the other mans woman, glad he kept his daughter. happy story! 5

I am a woman & frankly i dont see anything wrong with the way he treated her.

All their married life , he was never rough & the first time he did get rough all she had to do was to tell him to stop. But she couldnt could she?

All the subsequent revenge fucks were just to instill fear & very successfully too. I hate cheaters & infact feel that he should have fucked both of the in the ass, the man with the wooden leg of a table chair. Now that would have been a true pain in the ass!

I am also female, and agree with the OP...no matter what, no person deserves to be treated in such a manner...and for the record, had you read the story without your pathetic bias, you would have noted that she did say stop...that makes it rape, and makes the asshole character worthy of losing his precious daughter...just my thoughts!

Thanks for sharing.

Hope you read this, slut. Probably you are like the slut in this story.

make time to discover whats worth and whats not. TK U MLJ LV NV

Good story. JaneDoe31 is probably a cheating slut or lesbian. I think the wife got off lightly.

Anyone who has sympathy for the cheaters must be a cheater themselves. Especially Janedoe that ignorant slut.

HA

It worked out well and the sex scenes were OK, could have used more details.

But some confusing elements. Why does the character spend time questioning why she is afraid of him? He is threatening her. He is forcing her to have sex and taking her aggressively - essentially raping her. Is this really something the character is confused about?

But you never divorced the cheaters for abandonment? Thinking that was the first thing you should have done. What happens when one or the other or both of them find you? Then you're in deep cow manure. Got to plan better.

Additionally, the wife was once referred to as Nancy and another time as Sandy!!

Cheaters loved each other.. Actually most likely it was perfect ending for them. How exacly did they pay the price? They didnt even bother contacting their family.. If they cared about their daughters they would have taken them after finding secure place. You should have added that they were miserable from that point.. or whatever.

It would be different if they wouldnt be in love with each other.. They would break up in 1month after running away and regret it.

But why iam even saying it..

probably a blessing to them they werent saddled with kids

If there were any degree of plausibility, it would be a great story. Six years and he never met her at work or her coworkers? Quite outrageous! He didn't want his wife to work? His daughter was biologically not.

This story is only slighter better than the huecuck-like nonsensical babble that illiterate tard cantbuy posts - reads like it was written by a 12 year old.

cantbuy is a cockless closet cuck - so insecure and frightened it won't allow voting or anon comments on his shitty submissions - total fucking loser.

Where to begin? He has very good reason to think his wife is cheating, so just dithers for ages. He finally follows her to find out for sure, and doesn't take a camera. He claims he is a loving and caring husband, but repeatedly and violently rapes his wife for several weeks until she is in terror of him. I hate cheaters, but by this time I am feeling sympathy for the wife. Finally, the cheaters wind up with what they want: each other. Who pays?

why not send her to her lover just fucked instead of getting sloppy seconds when she gets home lol??

I would have preferred that he have the woman sue for divorce in absentia and get the pharmacy but possibly this worked out better. Thank you for this entertaining story.

They are together, He left her a little cash. He still owns the Pharmacy and shared nothing from the sale, if there was one. Nothing jeopardizes his license to practice. And they get to live happily ever after.

and,

"I heard Karl tell my wife that he was making sure that his wife would never get her driving permit, that way she couldn't follow him"

yet somehow Karl's wife and daughter are able to get from her house to his for pizza in less than 15 minutes? They must walk really fast?

They were uncaring and would likely be happy having a child or two of their own.They paid no price or very little for cheating all those years. In fact they were likely rewarded for it actually by finally living with the one they loved.

It's your ending but you don't show any cheaters getting theirs in the leastl.

from ur auto bio cuck tales

They didn't pay not a little bit...They didn't care about their children...They just want to be together!!! Just a question: who got the pharmacy? Did he sold it? A story with a lot of holes....and no revenge...

I'm glad the ending turned out the way it did nice story.

Ridiculous settings, uninspired story line and plot.

for me reading it, and author for writing such insipid offering. Could have been a good story but nothing was fleshed out, plot line was shallow formula, no integrity to characters and their feelings or reasons. So the cheaters wanted to fuck and love each other. Big deal.

a bit quick, with some fortunate timing issues, it could have been fleshed out a lot more. cheating for 6 years. a daughter that doesn't look right. never meeting her boss. once suspected not doing a DNA test. there's a lot going on, but no accidents, no missed communications, there's a lot that could have or should have been giving him some kind of indications, for 6 years. then the pay back is what, not even a divorce?

Dumbest plot. Not even worthy of commenting any further.

The story was a bit underdeveloped with a hard to accept premise. Please edit or ask someone else to critique and proofread your writing.

At the cottage when he first saw them together. Sneaking in and rendering them both unconscious then a simple fire from a misplaced candle would have ended the affair and stopped the problem 'dead'. No divorce, no mess, no fuss.

it is time to adjust priorities, TK U MLJ LV NV

Fucking diabolical cheaters. Hopefully the reason the new happy couple haven't heard from the slugs is because they threw themselves off a bridge somewhere. You know, another chapter detailing their whereabouts would be nice. Hmmm...

"I suppose that by now they must have realized that cheaters always pay the price."

What price? They have each other. Yes the lose their children, but they never wanted them other wise they could have fought for them after all they were the biological parents. You use the word revenge a lot but there is no actual revenge in your stories.

Good effort and well written. I enjoyed reading.

I thought Mr Smith and Mr Wesson were the divorce facilitators. They did not have any price to pay they got each other.Most men would have fed him to the swamp crock with a bullet in his cock.

If Rachel had been fucking/and in love with Karl for just about all of her marriage to Cucky,and Karl felt the same about her,what the fuck were they waiting for?! Better planning would have allowed them to slither off with both daughters.

Perhaps one more paragraph could have been included which described the horrific head-on car crash in which Rachel and Karl were killed.

If a cheater says, "I have fallen in love with someone else" and they leave their spouse and children what does that mean? Lust is sexual desire for another person, there is plenty of that to go around, and it is certainly controllable. Love is CARING about a person or persons welfare to a strong degree. So if a person cheats on a spouse and their kids, they are really saying that they do not love their spouse and kids. Kinda of irrefutable. The do not care about the welfare of their family. They do not care about what their desertion will mean to the family structure, finances, ability to thrive, to their emotional well being - they do not care. They made a choice to break their vows, they made a choice to care more about a new person than their family. So, why when a wife cheats would anyone ever think it is in the children's best interest to give the mother custody of the children?

how did they pay? now they can fuck as much as they want? also why even marry the cheated on husband at all? this story did not make much sense

...was the best option. A bullet to Clarkson's head and a carefully implied similar threat to Rachel would have been the best path to take. But I am glad that Sandy and Kathy got the chance to discover they were sisters and well loved by their true 'parents'and got to welcome another sibling into their loving family.

The whole story seemed contrived, forced, if you will. I didn't like it much, I only gave it 1 Star.

I was happy with your not having him attempt to kick ass. Physical violence against his wife and her fuckbuddy would more than likely put him in jail. While in jail he's going to lose the daughter, his house, and his money.

All for some people he doesn't trust or like.

Yeah, if he tried but, didn't kill them she'll get everything. All he'd get is butt fucked by bubba and his friends in prison. His choice wasn't a Good one but, it worked.

You tried to lay out the ground work for a backstory but, your story seemed rushed. I wouldn't have mind if you took more time and did more of a follow up on the cheating spouses.

A story seems contrived duh! It's a story!

A good story

The man knew he could not stay married but, at the same time he didn't want to lose the daughter. He was told by HIS lawyer that in a divorce he would more than likely have to give up his daughter in the process. The author went to work to force the wife out so the Daddy who was cuckolded could keep the girl he raised as his. The point was made quick in the story which I appreciated. The writer told the story without making the story too long. I liked the ending and I wanted to know what happened with the runaway spouses as a follow up.

She cheated cuckolded him and he is still fucking that whore??? What a pervert you are??? He is not violent but he raped her the whole time after his discovering of her betrayel?? Are you insane??

YOU read all of these stories knowing you fucking hate them. Only a insane or a fool person would do that!!! I hope you live a long long time and suffer about what your wife did to you day in and day out. And think about all the cocks and cum she took in as you watched.

Whilst reading this story my mind wandered back to sitting in a theater with those absolutely dorky 3D glasses, in between my legs was a huge bucket of popcorn in my right hand was a bottle of coke! Ah those were the days! OH we should say something about this story "FAN BLOODY TASTIC" Thanks for sharing this Fantastic story with us! Love you all! GREG OH 100 % OF READING ENJOYMENT! BYE! OH OH OH (bloody hell it does sound like an orgasm ) oh yeah remember the drive in theaters! AH THOSE WERE THE DAYS NEVER DID SEE MUCH OF THE MOVIES! BYE!

Bullshit story. There was no real payback justice meted out to those assholes. He could have sued the fuck for back child support and won it.... then STILL got custody of his daughter, providing the proof to Claudine for her divorce and ended up fucking Karl's ex-wife while Karl was broke and afraid to let the slut get a real job and help out because she'll probably dump him and hook up with someone with money.

I know it is just a story but if I enjoyed it I don't worry about all the nitpickers. FIVE STARS!