Good premise, and pretty fair writing. Just flesh it out some more, give us some details to expand the reality, please.
by
Anonymous07/19/09
back ground
good but needs a lot more back ground what was thier relationship like before you give no indication of any privious feelings toward each other also you really glossed over the whole sex part it was like you were afraid someone was going to catch you writing it so you went as fast as you could this needs a rewrite and a good editor a second chapter would also help
by
Anonymous11/11/10
fucking hawt but why
i loved the sex scene but why did they do this was it provoked have they had feelings for each other before why the sudden bam hot sex with sis must have more must have reason
by
Anonymous01/12/12
usless
why did you write only a rushed third of a story? this should have been chapter two and a lot longer. chapter one would have explained why she was living with him, why he was paying her college fees, and why there was no mention of parents. chapter three would continue from this rush job to finish the story properly. the best thing you can do is delete this so called story and do a total rewrite using all the comments to make it better.
by
Anonymous06/12/12
sister came to stay
my sister was having trouble at home with mum she ask to stay with me i said yes but i only a bedsit we would have to shear the bed she said anything is better than home the first night i went to bed in boxer as i dont have any pj she was in nickers and bra during the night my cock hard and up her ass she pull her nickers to the side and let me fuck her now we fuck whenever we want
English
It wasn't the greatest but since it contained No
Anal. No oversized dickey or boobs I liked it better than most. Thanks
good work ..
keep it up ..
thanks!
Sunny
Continue please
I liked the story. I think Faye should trick her brother into giving her a baby.
Too fast
Good premise, and pretty fair writing. Just flesh it out some more, give us some details to expand the reality, please.
back ground
good but needs a lot more back ground what was thier relationship like before you give no indication of any privious feelings toward each other also you really glossed over the whole sex part it was like you were afraid someone was going to catch you writing it so you went as fast as you could this needs a rewrite and a good editor a second chapter would also help
fucking hawt but why
i loved the sex scene but why did they do this was it provoked have they had feelings for each other before why the sudden bam hot sex with sis must have more must have reason
usless
why did you write only a rushed third of a story? this should have been chapter two and a lot longer. chapter one would have explained why she was living with him, why he was paying her college fees, and why there was no mention of parents. chapter three would continue from this rush job to finish the story properly. the best thing you can do is delete this so called story and do a total rewrite using all the comments to make it better.
sister came to stay
my sister was having trouble at home with mum she ask to stay with me i said yes but i only a bedsit we would have to shear the bed she said anything is better than home the first night i went to bed in boxer as i dont have any pj she was in nickers and bra during the night my cock hard and up her ass she pull her nickers to the side and let me fuck her now we fuck whenever we want
crap
Total load of rubbish
A WASTE OF TIME !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TOO SHORT , NOT ENOUGH DETAILS. AND NOT MUCH OF A STORY.........LAROC OF AGES
SHAME FOR YOU
YOU OUGHT TO BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF DOING THAT TO YOUR SISTER BAD EVIL THINGS WILL HAPPEN TO YOU NOW
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission! or
Back to My Sister Faye or
More submissions by fetish_freak_28.