All Comments on 'Discovery of the Moment Ch. 08'

If I don't get feedback there's no way for me to know if people will want to see this story continue. Say SOMETHING, even if it's a complaint.

I like all your work but this was my favourite so I am glad its back as it had been awhile. Hope that as you are writing again things are picking up for you. As for continuing I like the story but at the same time you have created a natural conclusion with her pregnant, I assume. Perhaps skip to the next generation like the bullet with his e kids story? Or not if you have more planned for them. Main thing is glad you are back and I hope next year is better for you. Thanks. -- UK CYNIC

i would love to see where this goes on from here. wounder if they have really made a baby?

The sex, as always, was hot, well described, but not overdone. I was a bit disappointed with the removal of the danger element though. I was hoping for more of the 'crime fighting' and perhaps some not-so-happy twists of fate to spice it up a little. Seriously, up to now, without the sex, this would still be a good read. I'd hate to see it turn into a stroke story!

i came across the first chapter and read it and didn't really like it but i continued to read because i'm the type of person who like to finish a story once i start it...don't get me wrong i didn't totally hate it but for some reason i couldn't really get into it. i really didn't like the whole lets do bad things because we can idea of it either and the part where he had sex with his daughter the first time in the bathroom made me actually feel sick...sorry but thats how i feel about it.

I've read all of this series, this one seems a bit TOO fake. however, I'm giving you a 100 because I know I will love it we much as the earliest chapters. Keep up the good work!

I found this chapter lacking the emotion that the first parts had. There was no urgency to what they were doing and three years flew by as if they were three pages. oh, yeah, they were.How about three sentences intsead? "We stopped fucking long enough to get rid of our old lives. we moved to a small town and cleaned up the crime. We decided to have a baby. THE END"

I understand some of the complaints voiced so far. Some of you, I'm sure, are expecting this storyline to end soon. Well, rest assured that I have a LOT more in store for this story. During my time away from writing I had plenty of opportunity to plan some things out and come up with a solid outline for the full story arc. There IS more coming, I promise you. And, believe it or not, the adventures John and Kelly have with their crime fighting truly is just a flash in the pan compared to what they will face soon- that's why I glossed over it and didn't go into much detail about it. Trust me: there's more to this than you might imagine!

THIS IS THE BEST STORY I HAVE FOUND ON LITEROTICA

Me I really Enjoyed the story so far. I mean yea some parts like the first time they had sex were kinda of for lake of a better term wierd but besides that it was a good story. It was well thought out put together nicely and as for grammor and punctuation better than most. So as for alot of the different stories I've read on this sight This series is very good. Keep up the good work and i cant wait for the next installment.

-TL

While the story is somewhat light on the sex parts, the overall story is subperbly written and entertaining. This is like one of those books where you just can't put it down because you want to know what happens next.

Great Story !!!

This is definitely my favorite story on literotica. This is my second reading and I think I enjoyed it even more than when I first discovered it six months ago. You put a great deal of thought into the "physics" of the fold but still managed to make it a love story. You conveyed the emotions of the characters very well, and did an excellent job of making the progression of the story logical. The only concern I have is that continuing any further will be like making the second and third matrix films. But I look forward to seeing what you have in store for the new couple with wrapt anticipation.

I am not sure where else this story can go. I did miss the use of the Fold. Since that is how this story started, I would like to see more use of it IF this story continues.

I'm sorry that I haven't written any more on this, but I can assure you that it ISN'T the end. There is still very much more of the story left to tell and, no, it won't go the way of "The Matrix." Think more along the lines of Robert Heinlein.

Your story was a delite to read and I enjoyed every chapter with joy and cherished the story line it was very injoyable to read , Thank You

I read these stories before and I think you made some changes to them, but over all they are all still good stories. You might want to add to this one though with the baby or babies that they might have

MOREMOREMORE

More

Wow ! Have enjoyed every word from start to finnish. Excellent rear and spell binding story. Thank You sooo muchhh. my only other comment is

MORE! MORE!

I think your writing is some of the best I've seen on Literotica. Your sex scenes flow so well, and the content makes me cream my panties. I really like the father/daughter taboo, the development of their sexual relationship, and the way they talk dirty to each other, and I especially like that it's set against the context of a loving relationship. I love that in this story she ends up begging him to make a baby in her, and would really enjoy reading more and longer sex dialog like it. Thanks, and my lover who reaps the benefit of me reading these stories thanks you too.

I've read most of the other comments and have to agree with every positive thing that was said.

As a testament to your skill I kept reading for over an hour after I got off. Normally I can't close the internet fast enough once I'm finished, but you kept me hanging in there to finish it out.

In a previous chapter Kelly mentioned that they would have a baby girl and she would raise their daughter to sexually please her father as well. I'm really interested in seeing some of that.

The only let down for me was the way Kelly became less of a sex crazed teen and more of a sex crazed woman. Character evolution isn't a bad thing, but the lusty, slutty naivete was a huge turn on for me.

You could easily have the best of both worlds with Kelly providing the loving romance and their daughter providing the carefree fun.

I noticed you published a few stories in recent months and hope you'll revisit this story.

I know I've read something very similar before that also was told as a daddy daughter adventure. Seem to recall that was a darker and more sinister tone though and your tale was more to my taste.

I liked the anatomical description of their intercourse even if you took a great liberty with some facts of female physiology. You got a bit over-the-top with the smutty dialogue in the last encounters. The restaurant scene with the non-consensual act was pulled back just about right. As long as we're only fantasizing, that kind of indulgence can be dabbled in as well as the father/daughter thing.

The vigilante aspect was okay and I liked that it mainly took place off-stage. It added drama without getting mixed up into the romance, passion or sex. You explored the human feelings enough without going too maudlin.

It would have been cool if you'd indulged us a bit further into their future as a couple and presumably a new family life. As more than two years have gone, I suppose you'll not revisit this story. A pity. Thanks.

MPP

I have read many stories here, good and bad.

This story is in a class of it's own! The writing itself is impeccable, and the sophistication of it all blows the others out of the water. I guess my real comment is don't you DARE stop! :)

Would you please continue it?

Another very well-written story. I don't have a good enough vocabulary to describe this properly, so a 'wow, that was really good' will have to do!

Please write more...

This story is really good! I started off looking for a sexy story, but I read all of the chapters to find out what happened with everything. You should try to make this a little more family friendly and turn it into a book. It kinda reminded me of the movie Jumper (? The teleporter movie). Good luck!

This is one of the HOTTEST series I've ever read! PLEASE give me more!

IMO you have exhausted all the possibilities that you can with this story. I really enjoyed it (and, who knows, some day the activities described might be real) but think you have come to a good stopping place. I will check out your other writings so keep up the good work.

This is hands down the best story I have read on literotica. Each chapter begged the reading of the next. Very novel.

Amazing series and I love the characters. The progression was good but felt a bit rushed. I think there is still plenty of room for growth and future stories, even during pregnancy there are possibilities of issues that could come up (after all what would happen if she went into the fold while pregnant? Faster pregnancy? And complications?). Please continue this series, don't leave us hanging.

Your devoted fan!

Seriously awesome you should continue the story line with the kid/s. Oh and u never said if they mastered the long range shifting technique.

Please don't fuck it up with a tragedy along the way, it would really disappoint your faithful fans. Thank you for writing these good stories.

Loved the book its very good I was wondering if there was more to it?

Hoping to see much more, and I've already provided input on the other chapters

Kind of concerned since these were from 5years ago, rats

THX for a hell of a run;

DKP

The ultimate act of love between father and daughter and mother and son, an incest baby. Thank you!

Wish there was more detail on crime fighting and doing wacky shit in the fold.. for the baby i hope its a twin brother and sister that both have the ability and continue the legacy

I really liked the dirty talk and would have loved it to be cranked up half a knob. Why "..make a baby in me." when it could have been "..make a baby in your baby.". Sexually I'd like for Kelly to submit to her father cultivating their power relationship of dominant father and submissive (but naughty and seductive) daughter. As somebody else wrote we'd like more of Kellys wild side as when she started. Perhaps it's grown more sophisticated. What happened to Kellys bisexuality, voyeurism, erotic writings and Johns reading of them.

No fold action curling crime were a surprise. It would only have been an intermission on the relationship. Concerning their relationship it was very nice that so much believable relationship were put into it. Please use more time into that. Now that they aren't official blood-related any more it's okay for them to have an eccentric father/daughter themed relationship. Him being "dad" and her being "girl".

I hope you have your heart into it as you equalled responses with new chapters.

GRADE AAA STORY ON SO MANY LEVELS ***** & 17 YEARS PAST >?? KEEP CUMING FORTH WITH WORDS TYVM

Like, wow.

Wow...I really hope this isn't the end...would love to see some pregnancy sex.

I was more than a little disappointed at how little energy you put into describing their crime fighting career...would loved to have seen your take on how they took down king pins and politicians.

But the sex...holy shit...I love her dirty talk. Keep it up please.

I agree with the last person, this story could use a little more (it's very good as it stands). How many kids did they have? Did any of them have the ability to get into the Fold? Did they start to interact with the locals?

another wonderful series with room for more chapters. please continue

Definitely my favorite time stop story. You killed it with this one. I personally would have liked a bit more of the vigilante stuff, and I think it would have made sense for her to train while they were getting situated, but otherwise, a nice story.

Super series! Even if you don't continue it, that's OK! Great job.

I absolutely loved the series thank you so much

Absolutely perfect. Had me up late too many nights. Just a gracious thank you for wonderful writing and a beautiful story. Thank you so much.