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Long Distance Sucks

byLenina24©
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by Anonymous

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by Anonymous03/26/09

Kind of fun...

For a pretty pure stroke story. The knock on the window was not much of a surprise to the reader (maybe more so to your protagonist).

Your writing style ain't half bad, although my personal preferences would be to have your dialog out of the paragraphs, and separated, so that one would know which character was 'speaking' at any given time, with less effort.

Otherwise, decent technical skills — didn't notice lots of misspellings or punctuation errors. LOL! We're brutal here aren't we..

Best,

PostScriptor

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by digdaddyrich03/27/09

Why does she call him Kid?

Is she that much older than him? He certainly knows how to handle her, and get her off. I liked the story,short and sweet. Thanks.........Rich

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