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English
A little too rushed, maybe
I really like this story, and was glad to see more, but I think this chapter may have been a bit rushed. It's great to see more back story on Bianca (and will be for Tony, too, when it's time). The problems are really more grammatical, I think. In the 3d and 4th paragraphs, you move to present tense, which is a little jarring. It really takes you out of the story, b/c you switch from Bianca's POV to a removed person, which you hadn't done before. I think with just a few word changes, you could make this flow a little better. But keep going, I really want to see more!
ummm
did you really just stop right there? Not cool at all miss. I'll expect and update and soon, darn cliffy's.
good but could be better
I've read all 4 chapters for this story and its good but the pacing of the story is a little to fast, all these milestone events in the characters life should have more buildup. which makes each chapter is way to short but over all still a good story but not as good as it could be.
mmmmmm
i realy like this story but your taking to long with the chapters and they are to short.
OKay...
I don't want to beg, but I will if I have to. Please update this story soon!
Way too Steamy!!
Please, Please, PLEASE I need more
what happened
Where is the rest. That note said part 5 was going to be out soon and now its 4 months later almost 5
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