Cuckolding: My Analysis

Excellent Analysis-with Two Additional Comments

This is an excellent analysis of the subject, and relatively impartial. I find two additional things that are interesting about these stories: 1) Although they are told from either the cuckold's or wife's point of view, rarely if ever are they told from that of the cuckolder. This is in spite of the fact it is not uncommon to know men who hit on married women ("less problems"). Furthermore, the cuckolder's characterization is typically minimally developed, as though he were merely a prop in the story. A quick review of cuckolding sites supports this: the overwhelming majority of members are cuckolds with very few cuckolders represented. 2) The vociferous, angry and almost irrational responses from some. Obviously, for some reason these stories strike a raw nerve with a few readers. Almost all cuckold stories are followed by vehement denunciations of the story concept itself and the behavior of the characters, not with the execution of the story itself.

Wondered

Why these stories were a turn on my self, I don't find the idea erotic at all but some do or their wouldn't be so many stories. That is another reason, it makes it easier to write a sex story when cockolding, swaping, swinging, three somes are involved, and if not excepted than the story is about a divorce not sex. While a lot of these authers wouldn't allow this for real, they will put it in the story for the sex. What I don't get are the two or three comments from people who try to tell us this is great and a real man is secure enough to let his wife fuck around and enjoy it. Having been the other man several times when I was single and in my 20s I didn't respect the husband, nor did I want to be him, that part of the story is just bullshit. A cockold is a cockold, the dictionary says it all. Thanks.

Why not female dominance?

I believe that Cuckholding is a form of dominance. It seems to me it is comonally acepted that the male is superior to a female. It is more common for a male to rape a female and a female or females to be the slaves of a male master. Further evidence exists in dealing with the alpha male (example were stories). Although, I admit in these catagoreis of relunctance/ non-consent and BDSM there are female dominant characters. Cuckholding is an avenue in which a female has superioity over a male. Which to me should be just as aceptable as other forms of D/s. Furthermore, for a man to become less powerfull in a relationship is attacked more and seen as a downfall where a woman in the same situation is seen as takeing her place. Personally, I believe that it should be left to the individual and partner to decide the relationship that suits their needs and desires. Why should it matter if one sex should be more dominate than another, should'nt that be up to the individual? Ps. I know my spelling is bad.

Hits the Nail on The Head

An excellent analysis.

Interesting comments by the writer.

My view point is more oblique, I seriously dislike cuckolding in any way shape or form. However, we do swing sometimes and we both enjoy sex, she is bi and I am not. And we never play alone and have at times been in both FMF and MFM threesomes. We simply dont play alone. And in no way shape or form do I consider this cuckolding. I do think however their is a very faint but distinct difference between cheating wives and cuckolding wives. To make it easier to understand I feel the difference is that some women cheat to humiliate their husbands and that makes it cuckolding whether the husband knows she is cheating or not. And plain cheating is when a wife is involved in an affair but has no desire nor need to humiliate the husband. Either way personally I think the marriage is toast. I feel as Sherman did, war is hell, burn it to the ground. There is no reconciliation possible as the mental issues that made it possible first time have not been eradicated. I do see a difference between women whose husbands have medical issues that make it impossible for them to have intercourse who give their wives permission to have sex with others and what would be described as cuckolding. In your discussions you left out a major part of what an involuntary cuckold has inflicted upon him. The unknown medical risk, physical risk to her, him, and the marriage, and finally the financial risk regarding blackmail and loss of employment or income because of outside knowledge of the activities of the wife. Lastly I find it almost incredible that any adult male would allow themselves to be humiliated and treated in the ways described and not suffer from some types of mental illness. All told you have started a firestorm!

Good Analysis

As a writer of erotic stories, I’ve often wondered about the motivations of the people that pursue this particular activity. And, while you’ve covered the Male Perspective extremely well, your analysis of the Female Perspective seems a bit incomplete. It also occurs to me that some couples may consider cuckolding to be a mutually enjoyable, shared sexual activity, with neither party being a victim. In any case, I’m happy to find that someone has attempted a relatively impartial analysis of this activity. I hope to read more of your observations, in the future.

mindless drivel

you claim to be well read on human sexuality yet you cite wikipedia. at what community college were you "formally educated"?

Good analysis

Nice analysis of this type of behavior among men and women. I say that because there is an element of truth in many of these stories, although some of them are so extreme that they hold little interest. Still, even in those stories, one cannot rule them out of the realm of potential reality?

I guess what I find particularly interesting is the impassioned comments some make about this type of story. It seems if they are critical enough they will be able to censor, or drive away all who write about this life style. They seem to want "loving Wives" to be just about monogamous couples, which would make for some pretty boring reading in about a week.

Many have commented about why these self imposed censors come here and read erotic stories if they find the subject matter so upsetting. I have no answer, except to suggest that they are basically small minded people who cannot accept diversity of thought. In another life they might be book burners, or even worse.

But, I digress.

Very interesting Vulcan.

First of all I have always liked your comments on my stories and others. They are always coherant and straight forward. And for the most part honest. I like that.

Secondly this essay brings up a number of issues. The main one, to me anyway, seems to be why would two people in what would should be an equal partnership allow this cuckold lifestyle to start? Personally I have no way of understanding why a man would allow another man to cum inside their wife/girlfriend's vagina, or mouth, then to take the next step why would a man allow himself to be TOLD to lick the cum of another person from that vagina. I have read a few comments that eating your own cum is accepted as erotic. The woman enjoys it and it seems the man enjoys it as well. Me personally I have never tasted my own cum or anyone elses. And for those who want to know my wife always spits she NEVER swallows. In my stories I have the wives giving blowjobs, but you will notice they always swill their mouths out before kissing the husband. That is what happens when my wife gives me a blow job. And in case anyone asks about me kissing my wife after I have brought her to orgasm by eating her out, No she doesn't kiss me until I have wiped my mouth. So no she doesn't like the taste of her juices. Does it affect our love making? no it doesn't it is still as good as ever after 15 years of marriage.

There are certain writers who seem to want to explain why they like eating their own cum or someone elses. Or they like that their wife fucks around on them, strangely it always seems to be a big black man with a huge dick! I think that says a lot about the writers both male and female.

The idea that a second or third person should be allowed into a marriage is alien to me. I have always been of the opinion that if a husband is not happy with the sex in the marriage then he should 'talk' to the wife about. If nothing is resovled then a parting of the ways would be the best solution. Equally I believe that a wife should not come home one day with a vagina full of cum and say, "look I have solved our sex problem" I don't believe a marriage can exsist like this. Swinging is one thing Swapping another cuckolding should not happen in a stable loving marriage. There should be no need for it.

People who read my stories understand that from my point of view a couple can 'experiment' they can change what happens if they become board with each other. And to a certain extent I would say as long as the 'change' occurs with in the boundaries of the marriage the go for it. However most stories end up with the woman generally taking things too far. And yes the husband always waits too long to act to stop it. Once the horse has gone there is no point closing the stable door.

Anyway these thoughts of mine are like Vulcans, just my opinion. I know I am in the minority, I know very few people in the world at large think the way I do. But for the record, my wife and I have an equal partnership. neither of us holds any sway over the other. If my wife doesn't want sex a certain way then I accept that. Equally I don't like my wife touching my ass during sex play, in fact I don't like anyone touching my ass. My wife accepts this and we are happy with those choices.

Sorry I am taking up too much space. Vulcan thank you for this post and thank you for your time.

GW

You've taken quite a step!

Hephaestus — its quite a step to write down your thought (fiction or non) and put them out there for public consumption, isn't it! LOL!
You write a decent analysis, and you have readers taking PERSONAL shots at you, e.g. the anonymous 'mindless drivel.'
But once you've been under fire, and decided you can take it, the next step will be that seductive call to write 'Loving Wives' fiction. And you know what I say: Come on in, the water's fine.

you sure have

some good points here but I think you forgot some points. the real cuckholding stories (I don't mean those where a guy doesn't know she is cheating or where he found out after an affair) mostly have to other carachter traits. both male and female carachters have a very low self esteem. when she gets the attention of other men, she thinks in the beginning that it does her really good as she feels it as a boost to her self esteem. in the end she is even lower than before because she ends up as a fucktoy for others. so where can she win a bit back? when her guy submits too. confronted maybe with more a powerful man or men, he maybe fears more for his health than for his wife. when she sees it she has the upper hand on him too. it's like with the chickens. when one is hurt and you don't take her out of the group, the other chicken will kill the hurt one. so why does he stay? I guess he was happy to find a woman at all in the first place. and now he is back on his old life winning concept he already had before he had met his wife. don't fight , go away from the trouble and you don't get hurt physically. he will be again hurt mentally but that he knew already since he was a kid. and it might still be better than being alone for the rest of his life and he does not believe that he could find another woman at all. so he takes whatever he can get. but I will never believe myself that there is only one here who if he could choose would not change his position in life if I could give him the power to do it.

And then there are us, husband and wife, who

absolutely love this lifestyle. Unless you have participated in this type of sexual behavior you can't negin to imagine the feelings it gives you and your mate. And the sex!!!! My God the sex is unbelievable. Hard and strong and long with multi-multi-orgasms like you have never known. When it's done for the evening the feelings between the husband and wife are mind blowing, such a feeling of sharing and love. We change positons too, and that makes the sharing even better. One time he is the cuck and the next time I am cuckette or queen, or whatever that is called. We both get off seeing the other making love and fuck and suck the other person who is with us. As I see my husband's cock enter the new woman's vagina for the first or fifth time it's a extremely wonderful thrill and feeling knowing I am giving him a gift like no other. And he tells me how erotic and lustful it is to see my pussy stuffed with a big new cock and to see the orgasms on my face and my body as I cum makes him cum right along with me as he masturbates. Regardless of how you feel or think, you can't possiblily know or understand how it feels unless you have done it. There is no shame or pain or any of the other group of words these crule brain dead people write about this way of sex. There is only pleasure to and for both partners. The life style isn't for everyone but for those who want it and like it it's better than anything you can ever imagine. I'm sure I will be blasted by the ass w/o a name on here and those who hate the idea of a different way of life, and me personally, but they have no idea how it really feels to see the love of your life being loved and hear the cries of pleasure as they cum. as you watch. One girl's opinion.

Bonnietaylor’s erotic writing

OMG, Bonnietaylor’s get a room or write another story! I think Vulcan have inspired you to write a mini story when you were getting ready to give Vulcan feedback for his essay. Still, I believe that Vulcan deserves a serious feedback, unless of course he does not mind being objectified and used as a sex object…
BTW, my comments are on the way…

Congrats Vulcan for the Intro to Cuckoldry101

Many thanks for bravely venturing into the unimaginable depth of human sexuality, both normal (who knows anymore what that means?) and abnormal or what ever way one may fancy calling it. Generally I think you did a very good job of shedding light on different corners of the human sexual behavior. The reason I am using this description is because in my opinion, while you certainly elaborated on much of your target concept, you have IMHO expanded it considerably –beyond what I believe is normally called cuckolding – wittingly or otherwise.
But in doing so no one ‘got hurt’. We gained more covered ground about which we could talk agree or disagree, it does not matter –as long as we are civilized and respectful –and why shouldn’t we be? The subject matter is certainly intriguing, the gentleman and the gentlewomen who would volunteer their opinions are all presumably informed, if not always similarly enriched by personal experience. So again thanks, Vulcan for your Intro to cuckoldry 101…
I have to confess, due to your thorough review I found myself writing so many comments that it felt too long for a regular feedback! I might submit a follow up to your submission, perhaps Intro to Cuckoldry 101.1?

HEY GW. Lemme explain, White Boy

"strangely it always seems to be a big black man with a huge dick! I think that says a lot about the writers both male and female."

Its because Blacks have bigger, stronger cocks, and many White WOmen want them. But WHite Men want Black Cock too, WHite Men are the biggest producers and consumers of Interracial Porn, with Black Men. I bet GW if you come home and find your WIfe having sex with a Black Man, you will jerk off first and cry later

Sorry Vulcan. I am going off the point here.

To the person below me who has taken a cheap shot at me. Guess what it is anonymous so I can't reply directly to him. First of all I couldn't give a rats ass that white people both men and women have black or white porn. I don't care that people like to watch black men have sex with their wives or girlfriends. I care even less that a woman would want to have sex with a black man. What I do care about is people like yourself I don't care if you are male or female. I have stated what anyone on this site can find out for them selves. Look through the interacial section and anyone will find many stories by both male and female writers who like this idea that black men cuckold their white folk be they male or female. But if you are black good for you. If you are white and you enjoy watching your wife or girlfriend cuckold you with a blackman, again fine whatever floats your boat. but to address the topic you brought up of me going home and seeing my wife having sex with a blackman? Well considering it would NEVER happen in the first place, but that a side. If I came home and saw such a scene. Firstly the blackman wouldn't be doing anything to my wife a second longer. I don't care how big or strong he is I simply state that he would cease doing what he was doing. He would certainly be injured in some way and he would not be leaving under his own steam. Limping? possible? Crawling? Perhaps. Would he ever contemplate doing such a thing ever again? No he wouldn't. There is one thing that is so precious to me that with my last breath I would defend her. My wife. So to answer your pathetic idea that would never happen. No I wouldn't cry. I wouldn't watch. I wouldn't jerk off as you so quaintly put it. Now haveing said all that I will repeat what I have said before. I have many coloured or black friends. They come from all walks of life. NONE of them have EVER shown any disrespect to me or my wife or any other white person that we know. So the sterotype you speak of exsists only in minds like yours. And in the stories on this site and others. If you are inferring that I am a racist? then you are mistaken. As I said I have some good friends and people who I work with and they are black, they prefer to be called black more than anything else. They don't have your problem. I suggest you grow up and face the real world not a fantasy that you live in. Of course feel free to insult me personally in an email. But don't take up other peoples time and space to do it in public. Sorry about this Vulcan feel free to delete this comment if you wish to.

Good Essay

I don't like cuckold stories (with a couple of exceptions, e.g. JPB's "The Bought Husband"). I think ViO has probably done a reasonably plausible explanation for the plethora of cuck stories that get posted.To me, what BonnieTaylor describes isn't really cuckolding but variations on swinging - her post implies a loving and respectful attitude that mutually shared between both parties (hope I'm not reading too much into her post).Back to the essay, anybody who likes watching porn understands being a voyeur, but for me the thought of watching somebody that I cared about screwing somebody else isn't erotic at all. ToS2's "Painting the Bathroom" pretty much captured my attitude about the cuckold issue.

Reality vs. Fiction 101

One thing that seems apparent in many of these responses: a lot of people seem to have trouble distinguishing fiction from reality.

Perhaps, for some, these stories represent actual life experiences, but for most of us they are simply stories. Although some of them depict the real world, most of literature lives in the world of the imagination. From escapist genres, like sci-fi, gothic romance, westerns, mythic monsters, etc., to murder mysteries, historical epics, etc. Frankenstein and Dracula do not represent reality, but touch some part of our hidden psyche. Fiction releases the hidden demons inside of us all.

I would never practice cuckoldry in real life, but as a guy with a small cock these stories allow me to vicariously release my hidden fears of inadequacy in a non-threatening manner. Too many are confusing fiction for reality.

Jaded Numb Seekers of Humiliation

For those without anything to lose pimping out a spouse isn't a risk as the marriage has self destructed anyway.

Two rational person who sought marriage to insulate their loving relationship from others could not any longer be considered rational in their want to include another in or on their spouse.

That change from rational to non-rational is driven by an unhealthy need to humiliate themself or to humiliate their partner which can only occur when they no longer respect them or themself and their marriage which was the sole reason for their exclusive union and intention for a family.

The selfish weakness and need to arouse a numbed libido is only caused by prior acts or fantasies of extreme absurdities which have jaded the normal arousal senses so much so that the reasonable norm no longer excites.

The increased need will only climb to the next level until it too is numbed which then requires a higher level of absurdity and so on until only the subhuman perverse acts or fantasies excite. Once the ceiling is reached its on to the next until only the worst and most sordid remain.

After those fail to excite then its off into the unlawful degradations of pain and children exploitation.

The Sexual Offenders List and Site are the repository for those who selfishly punished their libido severely without concern for their future as well as their eventual predictable loss of self respect.

The paths certainty is akin to the odds of successful Russian Roulette with a semi-automatic weapon. There ain't none - so thats all folks.

Life's paths are always choice orientated but the smoke and honey spread by those already lost can obscure the inescapable pending ending especially for the young and weak and stupid.

For example - here just try a little coke - a little heroin - another - then another until it takes more to get high - to reach the same prior plane - until you have selfishly hocked your life, future and reason for living for the ever rising need for pleasure that eventually isn't.

How sad & how predictable.

It's a long life - so walk the hill of arousal slowly and with respect both for self and others.

Writer - you are to be thanked for provoking thoughts.

You touched a nerve, apparently

Let me preface my comments by agreeing with the contributor who makes the distinction between fact and fiction. It isn't because I enjoy reading murder mysteries or watching "Brokeback Mountain" that I have the characteristics of a murderer or a cop, or that I would grasp at the chance of becoming a gay cowboy. My comments apply only to stories, not to my or anyone else's real life. (Also, my comments do not pertain to the archetypal cuck stories, those where humiliating hubby is the mainspring of the narrative.)

This being said, I think you are missing seduction as a critical element of a good porn yarn. The description of the sexual act in itself quickly gets boring -- in fact, it is redolent of small children using naughty words just because they are forbidden. A good story needs an initial context, a build-up, a climax and a conclusion. For me, the build-up is the main thing: the initial sexual penetration is often for me the climax of the story -- the rest, the beast withy two backs and actual sexual climax of the protagonists, is part of the wind-down -- required, but pretty mechanical.

This is why I often enjoy stories that violate some taboo, whether it be adultery, sex in public, or incest: overcoming the taboo normally requires long and arduous seduction. This is also why I don't normally like long, multi-chapter stories -- it is hard to repeat seduction when the characters remain the same.

Interesting essay

I think there is a distinction between "cuckolding" and shared/hotwife stories -- in the former case, the humiliation is central, whereas I much prefer the voyeuristic/taboo elements of the shared wife/hotwife stories. There was one story, I think it was on Lit, where the wife asked her hubby why he was so turned on by the idea of her having sex with other men and the response was that he had always wanted to see her overwhelmed by pure lust. I think that summarizes myself and a lot of other men.

Justv to clear up two points of discussion...

(as if I have all the answers!)-but I know this,while Black men have penile lengths on average all of a quarter to 3 whole eights of an inch longer than whites,(As always-note the exception-EXCEPT ITALIANS!)-As a professional(and I mean it)porn watcher,their appendages appear to actually be quite weak,never achieving full erection.Secondly, B Taylor seems to have an open marriage which works for her and hubby.Lots of folks do.This is not cuckolding.Cuckolding is not an act of love.Pistolpackinpete

Interesting Discussion

I do believe that a good part of those who read and write cuckold wimp stories have no desire to turn them into realities. We have several stories on the site about disasters due to wives getting the idea that there husband wanted to be cuckolded because he read these stories. The nicest twist was where the husband said hell no, he identified with cuckholder!
That brings to the point mentioned below but not covered by Vulcan, the analysis of the cuckholder. I see that there may be those just looking for a nice sexual relation and those even looking for love at the cost of other people's worlds but there must be a reasonable number of males who are only counting coup.... The number of true cuckolders, those looking for a nice home for their children, ought to be pretty small. There also are lots of word of mouth stories that I heard about fifty years ago of guys doing wives with the husband's approval because the husband could not get it up. This was more common before Viagra!

Ditto - No humiliation for me

I appreciate your well thought out submission. I enjoy reading some of the stories you discussed, but not many of the others. The key difference was mentioned in a previous comment. "[T]here is a distinction between "cuckolding" and shared/hotwife stories -- in the former case, the humiliation is central, whereas I much prefer the voyeuristic/taboo elements of the shared wife/hotwife stories." I agree completely. I like the idea of having an irresistible "hotwife" covered in cum from animalistic sex with multiple men, including me. I want my cum on and in her, too. The previous comment about seeing "her overwhelmed by pure lust" is very appealing.

"Pure lust" story

I believe this is the story with the wife overwhelmed by pure lust. It is one of my faves in the LW genre.

http://www.literotica.com/stories/showst ory.php?id=185528

your thoughts are not deep enough

the cuckolding experience has much more powerful roots than the ones you quoted: humilation, exhibitionism etc.
The willing cuckold is someone who in psychological terms executes a "regression". He is now an adult male with a female companion but he likes more the mother-son relationship, so he recreates it, with the bull assuming the role of the father.
Every male son when growing up has this well defined oedipical complex due to the fact the his father is having sex with his mother, i.e. the primary object of his love.
He is jealous, he desires his father's death.

In a normal relationship, whrn adult he takes the place of the father (in his mind) but sometimes when this complex is not completely resolved hi finds still untangles with it, he struggles with it and in the end, recreates it: he has learnt to get off on the unresolved hate for his father and the desire and lust for his unreacheable mother.

Well, that's it.

One element that you missed...

I don't remember the name of the Longhorn__07 story that talked about a number of studies that shown men's sperm count increase when the man has been gone for a period of time. This is true even if the man masturbates before he returns.

The implication is that the possibility of an interloper brings on an increased potency.

to anonymous 07/07/09

Just because Freud said something was true, doesn't make it true. Almost all of his theories have been rejected by modern psychiatry. The whole idea of every male having and dealing with an Oedipus complex is preposterous.

Shut the frak up

This is like an article saying, "I'm going to comment on the French language... even though I have no clue how to speak it."

You're fraking guessing, and on top of it, you're laying your own judgment and morals on other people's sexuality. From the title, I thought I might find a cogent discussion of something most people don't understand. Instead, all this is is, yet another diatribe by a person who doesn't understand.

Are you now going to do an article called, "Gay Sex: My Analysis"??? Are you at all qualified to do that? If you're not gay -- how can you be? It's just being judgmental, that's all.

So, I repeat: Shut the frak up.

Oh shazbot!

You gorram greebol smurfer! Shut the frelling pie hole already! Bunch of feldergarb if you ask me. Fahrbot tralk wants to yammer on bout how big a frakin' slitch one can be, then be my guest. Yotz, tanj!
I just wanted to expand on the sci-fi cussing thing. No real comment.
http://www.indopedia.org/index.php?title=L ist_of_fictional_curse_words

Biased Assessment

I thought the male perspective was well thought out and analysed but there seemed to be an evident bias against the women or "howives" as if they were scheming criminals and the husbands were the victims. I think maybe you are not being fair and you should have given more time to consider the real reasons why a couple would participate in the cuckolding lifestyle.

Subtle distinction

Objectively, is there much difference between a couple who swings, or a couple in a MMF 3-some, or a couple with a "hotwife"---- and a cuckold couple? Just remove some of the terminology, cliched imagery, etc. and you are left with almost the same thing: a wife fucking another man.

If you don't understand it, you don't understand it. But it takes a very strong and healthy marriage to support these sorts of activities.

As for the big black cock--- it simply reduces everything to sex in its most primal elements, and is fueled by taboos.

My parting comment--- research shows a very high percentage of females "cheat" on their spouses.

To begin with, Wikipedia is not a credible source of information due to the information being changed and it is a source that I never use.

Second you make reference to the subconscious. I am not sure if you are referring to the super-ego in the Freud's theory or if you are coming up with your own definition. If you are referring to Freud's theory then I would disagree with your since Freud's work is primarily based on case studies and observations. In addition Freud frequently changed his position on his various theories , such as his seduction theory and when his theories are put to scientific analysis fall apart.

Third issue, you talk about cuckolding but you do not define it for the reader. Instead you discussion seems to jump to various ideas and it left me somewhat confused about what you meant by cuckolding. Along with this you do not define if cuckolding is short-term experience, long-term experience, or both. Finally in regard to this issue you do not define how many partners are needed before the experience can be considered a cuckolding experience.

Fourth issue, you present a lot of ideas but you do not elaborate on them by exploring different reasons for them. Instead you mention them, provide a few sentences then moving on to the next idea. My preference would have been to read a more detail discussion on one or two ideas then a condensed version of many ideas.

Fifth issue, from the way you have written this piece my feeling is you do not have much insight into the topic and my feeling much of your knowledge is based on the stories published here.

The one theory, you avoid, is the idea of shared experience. Cuckold can provide the couple with a shared experience and in some ways it could be said it is a variation of threesome in which the male half of the couple has a voyeur role. Voyeur role in this case involves the female half sharing the details of the experience for both of them to enjoy. It has nothing to do with humiliation, submission, solving a feeling of inadequacy, or a male believing his partner cannot be satisfied by him. Instead, it involves the idea of boundary exploration and experience. This implies that cuckolding can be a short-term experience for a couple without the need for the establishment of a long-term relationship or the need to take on multiple partners.

male bisexuality?

You tagged this post with "cuckolding – creampie – infidelity – chastity – bisexuality – infidelity – humiliation – female domination" but make no mention of bisexuality per se in your text. As a bisexual male, my first reaction is that a story like this is one that I would be likely to read (as some themes - such as two males and a female, males performing oral on women, men swallowing semen - do overlap) but that cuckold-male and bi-male are two different animals. One is a voyeur (watching another man pleasure a woman), the other is a participant (likely at minimum giving some thought to going down on both men and women, or more)

Certainly there is a strange double-standard both in the organised "swinger" community (NASCA-member clubs and the like) and in porn that bi-females are mainstream as long as they play into straight-male fantasies about having two women, but bi-males are the forbidden fruit which is not to be discussed.

That makes it more difficult to find explicit descriptions of exactly how two men and a woman can have fun if all possible combinations are treated as valid. Gay male porn has no women, straight porn has this squeamishness that a male is not to touch another male sexually even though bi-females and pseudo-lesbians (the two women as male fantasy) is eagerly embraced as mainstream. As such, among the little that comes up when trying to find "two boys one girl" this stuff inevitably appears... it's not the same as the second male is a spectator more than he is a participant but any port in a storm. The forced inequality between the two males (one is the bull, one is the cuckold) is not the same as the bi-male fantasy where a man and a woman pleasure a man together, each a full participant, each obtaining some erotic pleasure from the act but the lines do blur at times.

Unfortunate there is no "bisexual" section on this forum?

What's this then ?

What an arrogant r sole to think that he can explain everything to the rest of us.

Sounds like some failed/wannbe Junior School teacher to me.

Get yourself a life buddy...

Another view

Your analysis is very interesting, but I think you may have missed one important factor in understanding why some men enjoy sharing/watching their wives with others - and that is the element of 'control.' In many of the stories (not the submissive cuckold type) it is a male desire to make or persuade his wife to carry out his fantasy. Sometimes, I believe, it is often immaterial whether or not he derives pleasure from the actual observing, or knowledge, of her doing what he asks - it is merely the feeling that has been able to exert his power over her, even in what is meant to be the most intimate way.

other reasons

I had girl friends in college who wanted an MFM encounter, but I never went there (kind of wish I had though now), so my current willingness to have another guy fuck my wife while I watch may be, in part, a desire to relive my youth.

My first wife was a virgin (barely, she had given blow jobs, swallowed, and taken a couple of cocks up her ass before we met) and I developed an urge to share her in part to make her see how good forbidden sex can feel. Also I wanted another guy to feel just how unbelievably tight her tiny Chinese pussy felt. Knowing how hot she was in bed and not sharing her was like finding a great music album and not being able to play it for anyone else; I wanted someone to share the good news with; I also wanted to see her eyes roll back in her head from sustained great fucking from both of us. She was quite orgasmic and I thought she'd love the experience of having twice the cock to play with as well.

My second, and current wife, is a size queen and gets off on huge cocks (she's had a great but large ass since puberty and hung guys have always sought her out, figuring she could handle their oversize tools I guess). She's much more submissive when we include an occasional dude and I enjoy the fact she has to suck both of us as we take turns fucking her; I get more and much better head when she's got a large cock pummeling her at the same time. She, in turn, gets off on having a larger than normal (I'm the normal 6") cock to please.

So, as someone who partakes in this activity (and I agree with them distinction some of the commentators have made that our activities are more of a swinging thing then actual cuckolding, but I'm not personally hung up on the terminology used) I believe I represent three more reasons husbands may wish to share their wives: to relive their youth vicariously, to share enjoyment of a mutual thrill, and to provide additional please to a partner.

Re: Interesting essay

I think this commenter cast an unmentioned light on the subject in his reference, but did not go far enough. There is, in fact, a wide spectrum of extramarital experience in the Loving Wives category, everything from one time cheats to feminized humiliation. But it seems that all these are categorized as cuckold stories under the wiki definition, and certainly by the vehement haters who troll the group.

The fact is that each of us had our own set of psychological baggage, and it is certainly difficult to understand another persons perspective and emotions when you cannot wrap yourself in their foibles, notions, shortcomings and quirks. I personally do not see the attraction of a woman completely cutting off her husband, or feminizing him or having the bull humiliate him. But for some, as Vulcan points out, that is the attraction. My tastes run more in the lines of the paraphrased quote, the husband who wants to see the wife completely let go and enjoy, but there is an underlying current. I see it as a transference, or justification of a mans desires and wants. He wants more, dirtier, more forbidden sex. He loves his wife and feels guilt about what he sees as his unnatural desires, either through his own judgement or the real or imagined judgement of his wife. And so he projects his desires on her, wishing and wanting her to experience and WANT as he wants, thereby justifying his desires. To see her so wanton, so wild and needy, to drop her emotional shackles and societal boundaries allows him to admit his own desires and shed his shame at wanting sexual pleasure that he feels is out of synch with his wife.

This represents only a narrow slice of the "cuckold" genre, of course, the man taking pleasure in his wife's pleasure. Wide swathes of the genre are alien to me, but seeing a woman, or imagining my wife dropping her barriers and is the most exciting thing on the planet. Of course, that's just me.

About Cuckolding byAngelscuck©

I enjoyed your perspective on cuckloding. You mentioned that there were not very many articles on cuckolding by men. Well, here's one. I would appreciate any feedback. Angelscuck

Cuckolding has always been one of my favorite fantasies, along with humiliation, female domination, forced feminization and forced bi-sex. I do not consider myself weak, feminine, gay or homophobic.

One could debate that these fantasies could easily belong to a closet homosexual. They could, but not always. Just as one assumes a transvestite is gay, which is more often not the case. I have even tried a couple of men during my lifetime. It did nothing for me sexually. It neither repulsed nor excited me. I guess if I want to play with a cock, I prefer my own. We're old friends and rarely disagree.

My cuckolding fantasy remained just that, a fantasy until I was about twenty-six, when a live-in girlfriend cheated on me a couple of times with and ex-boyfriend and then once, blatantly with a new lover. It angered and disappointed me, rather than excited me and I left her the following day.

Later, when I was thirty-five I got into an open relationship with another live-in girlfriend. We agreed to have other lovers as long as we involved each other. I watched her fuck other guys, and she watched me with other women. It went ok until I became involved with another woman, who I ended up marrying.

For the next twenty-five years my fantasies remain a private thing and I did not mention them to either of my two wives or other girlfriends fearing that I might freak them out or turn them off. Throughout that time span I remained completely monogamous.

Then in my mid-sixties, I met a woman at work who I admired and we became close friends. Then after three years became lovers and now are about to wed.

After building love and trust between us, I began to share all of my deepest, darkest fantasies with her. She enjoyed hearing about them and would even role-play with me. We are both too concerned with the possibility of losing each other to ever make this fantasy a reality, however, it is fun to share and play with these fantasies. I have never revealed so much or felt so completely understood, as I do with her. It has only strengthened the relationship.

When I retired, due to health reasons, I began to write and discovered Literotica.com. I had previously visited the site to masturbate to some of the stories, especially the cuckold themes. I decided that the stories came close, but none really captured my ideal fantasy, so I decided to write my own. I liked it and sent it in to Literotica.

The reaction I received was a bit overwhelming. The cheers, the jeers, the hate emails and the encouragement. I decided to accept comments but copied them into my spreadsheet to contemplate and then erased them from public viewing. I wanted my readers to give me their opinions un-influenced by other comments.

I have submitted over forty-six stories and poems, erotic, and non-erotic to this and other sites. A small number compared to some authors but the feedback has been very illuminating.

I have come to see that the cuckolding theme, although as old as time, is one of the new taboos. First it was oral sex, then gay, now BDSM and fetishes. I know they have existed and been practiced for centuries, but I am talking about mainstream USA. There are S & M Clubs popping up all over and are becoming more and more popular each day.

Strangely enough, the most popular read theme at the site is incest. This is not a subject I care to discuss at this time but it seems cuckolding has become very popular and therefore, controversial. Many men see it as a weakness and detest it. Others find it very gay and repulsive. Some consider it a real threat to manhood, and despise everything about it. The reality is I get a hundred times more positive mail than negative.

I do not see it as any of these things. I see it as a sharing of the power, a concern for her pleasure and a means of dealing with the green-eyed monster that hides in all of us. The opposite fantasy, wanting to dominate women and use them, enslave and humiliate them with no concern for their pleasure has been the status quo for too many centuries. Not only is it unfair, it's boring.

Multiple sex partners: Risky, both to your health and to your relationship. You had better have a rock-solid love and even then you are taking a big, big chance. By using your imagination, you can have cuckolding and monogamy at the same time.

Cross-dressing, forced bi: A means to break away from the macho stereotype and try to experience the feminine side of ourselves. We all, men and women have both estrogen and testosterone swirling around in our bodies. We are chemical creatures. As we age, as men, our testosterone level drops and our estrogen level starts to take over. Some of you may be thinking, not me, not me. Perhaps you haven't...yet.

Interracial, black dominate, white submissive: Maybe a balancing of the scales. Unconscious guilt for past injustices. Searching for a deeper gene pool. Or the idea of a beautiful white woman in the arms of a strong, virile black man is just hot, esthetically, emotionally, artistically and morally. The breaking of another taboo.

Often, reading some of the hate mail, I think to myself, "You doth protest too strongly!" Why should anyone care so much about me sucking cum out of my wife's cunt that they would write, "You don't deserve to live, you wimp-assed faggot!" Or "She doesn't love you; she just wants your money!" This type of comment reflects some inner conflicts within the commenter.

In conclusion, I just want to say that I truly believe cuckolding, reality or fantasy, like most desire, if done with care, mutual consent and a genuine concern for the other person, can be a beautiful expression of love. Communicate, communicate, communicate.

There's a solution to women who want you to be a cuckold.

It's spelled D I V O R C E. And if you catch them in the act, it's called Justifiable homicide... at least in the state of Texas.

great anal ysis :-)

Seriously though, great analysis there, and i agree on the part about sexual inadequacy on the part of the husband. its only fair that in a very good relationship the woman should have the opportunity to have sex when she needs it.
cuckold blog

Interesting

I think you're over-thinking it. All of your points have merit. But like a foot fetish or BDSM, why would anybody go down this road?

I've met cucks (some of them don't want to admit it - they claim a "hotwife" type relationship) that served combat tours, played D1 Football, or were closet cases. But I would say the most common denominator is their formative sexual experiences involved their girlfriend or almost girlfriend doing it with somebody else. In an effort to control the emotional pain, they eroticized the experience when their sexual self was still being hard wired. And once that happens, a cuck can go down all kinds of crazy roads from gay fantasy connected to the wife, to humiliation. For many it goes in stages, each one crazier than the last.

As to eroticizing this early sexual pain, it's not hard to think of other examples. How many times do you hear about the porno star who was sexually abused as a child, the pedophile who was a victim of it themselves, the gay person who had some early experience with that type of situation? It happens all the time.

People want to believe they are born that way, but that's a cop-out. Nurture has a powerful effect. That's not to say they *aren't* that way now and permanently. In many cases they are. Yes, there are pretty scary implications, and it's very politically incorrect, but it seems to fit and I haven't seen science be able to explain sexuality any better.

As to the women in the relationship, for most of them it's hard. Some roll with it, but most fight it, for obvious reasons.

Scavanger role, sex teaching

My opinion is the next. This is a sexual minority thing same to the homosexuality. I am tolerant about it. I think the cuckolds would have positive role to fish out the sluts from the woman population so those husband candidates who would like to live in classical monogam marriage could get higher chance to avoid sluts. If the cuckolding practioners begin to proclaim this scavanger function to the majority I think they could get more tolerancy from the majority. Wives of cuckold pairs could give free of charge sex teaching for young virgin men, this is newer sociaty positive role (to decrease the hooker's prize) etc......

Excellent writing.

Interesting analysis. I'm not sure I understand the whole thing any better, but I'm a one-man kind of girl (no matter what my stories might lead one to believe). Your writing is impeccable.

People aren't a blank sheet !

Having lived the cuckold life style I find people's comments naive, there are so many variables ! Sure the guy could be a wimp with a tiny cock and his wife might have married him just for his wallet but most relationships are a bit more complicated than that lol

Perhaps the female is insecure and extra guys wanting her increases her self esteem and the husband understands this and is strong and secure enough to cope with it? Perhaps he's a bit bi ? Perhaps his just a perv ? Perhaps he is a fucked up weirdo who was whipped as a kid and now has sick kinks? The list is endless !

All the above applies to the females. In my case the guy had an average cock and we had an above average sex life, he was fit strong and not a wimp ! But he was very kinky and an extreme personality. Ex military, huge gym bunny and pushed his sexual boundaries, he refused to let "rules" say what he cold and couldn't do. In sex or anywhere !

He still got pussy mine and others but he just loved the cuckold game more than anything, especially the humiliation. Guess some people like football others like soccer? And some wimps tennis lol or golf ? What's that about? He liked to feel his stomach churn like riding a huge roller coaster.

One thing I would say, is nearly all the Bulls I've met were insecure arseholes who just wanted a shag and to prove they were a man lol very few could understand the dynamic. Not that I didn't enjoy them trying to prove how manly they were lol

Hope that helps some of you understand the dynamic better x

Conflict

One of the major things that make a good story is conflict. Cuckolding stories as a whole have a built in conflict. A story about meeting a girl in a coffee shop going out to dinner and then back to her place and having sex is just plane boring. Fallowing typical mundane interactions makes engaging the reader much more challenging. The reason these stories have such draw is the emotional response they elicit. People who read about bank robbery's don't want to rob banks but want the vicarious thrill of it, and people who play Farmville don't want to become farmers ether. So while there are people who would like to have these experience, most who read and enjoy them just want to get lost in the stories for a few and go back to there safe normal (if there is such a thing) life.

terminology

I notice that you haven't used the word Wittol in your article. I'm guess you're aware of it but, just in case, I'll clarify here that Wittol is the correct term for a man who accepts the infidelity of his wife. A Cuckold is an UNWITTING partner. Both words have been part of the English lexicon since, at least, the 16th century and they, usefully, describe different things. The current American porno translation incorrectly applies it to, as far as I can see, something akin to good old 1970's "wife swapping". I suspect it also is driven more by men than women. Just like the 70's eh? This use of the word also seems to be taking on a weird racial slant in that it seems to be most frequently applied to situations with black lovers.

PS, there's no such word as "cuckhold".