I think this story could have been a lot of fun, but it needed an editor. There are some grammar and punctuation issues that detract from the reading, but would be easily fixed. This is good, though.
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission! orBack to Office Fire orMore submissions by Sultry_Sieren.
[...]
Edit comment orSubmit Comment
Posting...
Comment posted successfully - click here to view it or write another.
Title of your comment:
Your public comment about Office Fire:
Please type in the security codeYou may also listen to a recording of the characters.
Preview comment
Title your feedback:
Your feedback to Sultry_Sieren:
If you would like a response, enter your email address in this box:
Send feedback
Sending...
Feedback sent successfully - click here to write another.
Username:
Password:Forgot your password?
Security code:
Your current user avatar, all sizes:
You have a new user avatar waiting for moderation.
Select new user avatar:
Upload and save Cancel
User avatar uploaded successfuly and waiting for moderation.
Close
English
Good but needs work.
I think this story could have been a lot of fun, but it needed an editor. There are some grammar and punctuation issues that detract from the reading, but would be easily fixed. This is good, though.
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission! or
Back to Office Fire or
More submissions by Sultry_Sieren.