All Comments on 'Melting Away, Slowly... Pt. 05'

by PostScriptor

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  • 115 Comments
Simple49erSimple49eralmost 15 years ago
Strange Woman:

Years ago in Bosnia when they had thousands of orphaned babies in orphanages who were not getting daily hugs and caring adult who would coo and kiss them, they began to notice a serious deteriation in them. I still wonder about those survivors, if they are OK. Many of those babies died; others showed serious mental problems; many as they got older could not relate to other people. Martha seems like one of those children grown up: her inability to empathize, her unwillingness to share physical intimacy of any kind (she could barely touch her grandchildren), and her decision to not get help, make her seem pathetic. I actually fee sorry for her. She is lucky so many others are not like her and will care for her as she gets older. He did the only sensible thing the could: divorce. However, were I his girl friend, I would give him the same advice he gave Martha: seek counseling. Years of emotinal deprevation had to have affected him and he could do with a tune up before he committs to a relationship: for all the sensible things he said, he really needs an objective observor to help him time things up. Great job.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
excellent rendition...

of a real relationship.(Would be a 100 from me but I didn't really like either character-he wasn't exactly a romantic ball of fire so what does he expect?)Pistolpackinpete

JDsellerJDselleralmost 15 years ago
Liked the story but don't agree with Mark.

I don't agree with Mark's solution to his problem. He wanted to try out a "new" model before moving on. I do agree with him that Martha's actions would destroy any marriage. I just think that he should have divorced first. Then he could go hunt whatever he needed to be complete.

My parents divorced after thirty years of marriage. He cheated on her for twenty of those years. I would not want to have lived with my mother but he should have left rather than cheated. So should have Mark.

CastleStoneCastleStonealmost 15 years ago
Wonderful Story

I swear that I left a comment for this story, before. I must be getting senile. As always a very well written and intelligent story.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Life must go on

a heart felt emotional ride that led to self awareness and growth.

well done..

FionaVolpeFionaVolpealmost 15 years ago
Finally!

I agree, he should have divorced her before the cheating. He was well on his way in distancing himself anyway...was the adultery supposed to help the situation with Martha somehow? Characters not really that likeable to me except for maybe Stephanie. Mark was just whiny and Martha could have been a piece of cardboard. The story was interesting nonetheless and I like the way you write. Thanks for the entertainment.

digdaddyrichdigdaddyrichalmost 15 years ago
A very well done piece of work

The author's style, writing as if he were talking to you, when you read the work, seems to sell the story and the characters to the reader. I have enjoyed every word. Thank You for the effort and willingness to write a very well done story.....Rich

KOTKKOTKalmost 15 years ago
Thank you.

Thank you for the entertainment. I'm having some mix feelings which I'm not able to express today.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Well written!

However, it didn't do it for me. I like a story to have at least one sympathetic character, so consequently you left me feeling unfilled. In all fairness I had to give you a 100 even if I didn't like your storyline because you are an outstanding author.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Accolades required.

A well written tale, so sad but true of life sometimes. The conclusion was sad but true. I was hoping to find a sizzling ending (selfish I guess) but it could not have ended any other way. All the characters come out with what they wanted and the son's even realized the position their mother had put there Dad. Again a great series and I thank you for sharing your time talent and works.

JADED_ONE1969JADED_ONE1969almost 15 years ago
Well Done sir.

This story was very very good. It is well written, but then that goes with out saying. But for me the story itself is good. Very readable and I enjoyed it. Yes it is sad readign aboutt he break up of a marriage. But Martha has a lot to figure out. I glad the husband has Steph for comapany. The story ended well. So Well done.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
excellent

I really enjoyed this story

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Excellent Realistic Story

The characters and the plot are quite plausible and true-to-life. I, too, feel sorry a bit for the wife; it may well not be her fault that she rejects intimacy. But it IS her fault for not seeking help after repeated suggestions. Simple49er, you are right that she is lucky to have people around her to take care of her. The husband's path to recovering his own life is reasonable and believable. But counseling for him would likely add nothing more than confirmation that he is doing the right thing for himself. Couples counseling would have been a waste of time with a wife whose mind is already is already made up. (Ask me how I know that.) Seems to me the husband is quite romantic to appreciative women, most especially for those who like to dance, a majority I suspect. And he did not set out to cheat. Rather, his goal was to recover and recapture the joy of life. He did all the right things before tentatively giving up on her and before making the final cut, and doing so in a very civil and caring manner. She is the one who created the distance between them that he was fighting. He was ultimately forced to choose the only method of communication that she could understand: actions. I find him a very sympathetic character. Of course, I see myself in the husband, having been there. My solution was a bit different, but the method to get there was virtually identical. My sympathies to JDseller, but life is considerably more complicated when it's your own. I stuck with 25 years of hell in marriage before I saw the light and put my foot down to force a change for the better in my wife (without further waste of time in counseling), but I am an exceptionally patient and stubborn man. It worked for me, but it has been intense. Anyway, this story really hit close to home. Good show, PostScriptor. drfarmer

Vulcan_in_OhioVulcan_in_Ohioalmost 15 years ago
Generally a good story . . .

The story was good, the writing was good, so what's not to like? Well, I guess it takes two to tango, and Mark blames everything on Martha but I think Mark also bears some of the blame for their failed marriage. Mark indicates he tried on multiple occasions to talk with Martha about their lack of intimacy, but we have only seen a tiny bit of this in the story itself. What Mark failed to do was to take a firmer stance earlier in the course of Martha's withdrawal from physical and emotional intimacy. Just as with the LW stories (and real life stories too) where the woman feels she is not getting enough attention, romance, loving, or whatever and seeks it outside her marriage rather than having a frank discussion with her spouse (to really give him a chance to change, to correct the situation), I have the sneaking suspicion that Mark never really put his foot down until he had someone else. Now why is that? Obviously he too derived some comfort from having the companionship of a spouse, even if she was not sharing his bed. It seems he did a lot of the cooking. I sense that he was a bit submissive for a time. If my wife withdrew from me, decided she no longer cared about sex, and periodically put me down both at home and in public, I would not simply keep it bottled up inside me the way Mark did in this story (for years, apparently). OK, he "begged" for physical intimacy but he never demanded it. What if he had said, "Wife, I feel that you don't love me any longer and I think we should get divorced?" Maybe the shock of it would have been enough to push her to get some help (and I think she did really need some, no make that a lot, of help). It's like a mid-course correction for a rocket to the Moon; a small correction early in the journey results in a large shift many miles further along the route. Waiting until the rocket is much closer to its destination requires a much larger correction. Now maybe it would not have made any difference, but I feel it would have been far more honest than Mark did do, which was to let the situation fester until it was much more difficult to change, and then to sneak around behind Martha's back to find intimacy and loving. It also would have given Mark the moral high ground -- in this story, he committed adultery yet only a modest percentage of the readers have been highly critical of him for this. Had this been a woman doing what Mark did, we would have seen comments like, "Kill the whore, throw out the trash, once a cheater, always a cheater, etc." I guess I'm feeling as if Martha was an uncaring bitch who did not seem to love her husband nearly so much as she loved herself, but Mark was not such a sympathetic character either. Had we found out that Martha was having one or more affairs on the side, and that's why she was behaving disrespectfully and without love towards her husband, I might have felt more empathy for Mark. Please keep writing.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Wonderful Story

This was a wonderful story about the gradual dissolution of a marriage caused by a frigid, unemotional wife and a sexually charged young in heart husband. I can't sympathyze with the husband completely,however in that he never attmpted to involve Martha in his dance class and when she attempted to initiate love making with him he got mad at her dislike for providing oral sex. He was pretty arrogant and self centered himself. It was hard to empathize with either of them, both selfish in my opinion.

the Ct. Yankee

PS Great writing though

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Classic Story Of The "Nice Guy" Husband

The husband is the classic "Nice Guy" that women/wives and bosses are so good at taking undue advantage of: Reliable, consistent, flexible, forgiving, patient, and understanding. He is slowly realizing the problem with that, and gradually becoming more of a "Bad Boy." The real problem he had was the very gradual withdrawal of the wife, so gradual that he did not see it until too late. This happens in many marriages, as in mine, particularly when both are busy working and parenting. Even so, he could well have said something of his concern to her over the years, only to be scorned or denied (or worse, ignored). Been there, done that, too. The blame here is fully the wife's. He is the victim, but takes it in stride while learning to be a bit selfish finally. He is not arrogant at all, merely giving her a small fraction of her own medicine. Actually, I admire this husband. PostScriptor, I suspect you've been near these kind of situations in real life. Good writing job.

KOLKOREKOLKOREalmost 15 years ago
Great read, but…

Something did not add up. As I mentioned in my comments to the previous chapters, from all the details the story provides, the relations between this couple must have gone south on a much broader range of problems than the single problem of Martha’s aversion to intimate physical touching (or is it only having sexual intercourse, as she seemed to overcome the former on the night she approached the husband at his bedroom). <P>

They did have more or less normal sex life up to a certain point in their lives, then something happened and she started to change her attitude. A lower sex drive is not something that suddenly appears in mid life. If there are such changes in adulthood – you would look at something that happened to the couple or to the person from that period of time and on (first on a physical level and then if the physical part is ok then you would look for the emotional part). <P>

If the wife – as it seemed at the last stage of the relations indeed loved her husband and truly feared of loosing him, It does not add up that she would still refuse to consider going to a psychiatrist or be checked by a physician. Those should have been the answers to the question she presented to her husband (Is this really necessary?) just before he started the moving -out process. It’s not like she could not have initiated those steps on her own –at least as a show of good will and in order to stop the break up process or delay it. <P>

The same could be said about the husband who could not have stayed oblivious to the fact that his wife was suddenly open to initiate major changes in their relations (true –not including everything in that one evening). He could have used the momentum and nudge her further by reminding her of his earlier requests (to go for therapy and be checked). He could have assumed that standing on the brink of divorce – she might be more amenable to accept his requests. Instead, he let the separation process move in an accelerated pace, and then only after he waits months on the side he ‘recognizes’ (to his relief I suspect) that Martha have not taken any steps ‘to be checked’.<P>

Could it be in part due to the fact that some other dynamics has been going on in his life in the meantime? Namely another woman has chimed in by now? It’s not an unrealistic scenario, where measures which could have been sufficient to salvage the marriage at an earlier stage fall into the category of ‘too little too late’ when one or both partners are finally ready to take those measures… It's not like the husband has not suffered enough and has not earned the right (even martha has granted it to him) to some happiness. So why the effort to excessively and retrospectively paint the wife in even darker colours?

I can truly see how the husband has gone from repeated frustrations to finding another woman. <P>

It just did not ring quite credible to me where at the end of the fifth chapter we are suddenly being barraged by so much damning information about Martha’s patterns of behavior about which there was not a hint earlier. She is made to be almost an autistic and extremely socially challenged. And on the level of rigidity the children describe her, it’s very hard to believe that even the thickest husband would not have noticed a wife who never agrees with anyone else's POV and always feels reluctant to be touched or to touch. <P>

Moreover, such symptoms can not be ordered to be faked for years if you have this kind of aversion all along, and they don’t come out of nowhere if those symptoms just start -presumably as soon as the children leave. One way or the other something does not add up in the analysis of Martha’s pathology. Still I very much enjoyed the five chapters as a whole.

SELSTIMSELSTIMalmost 15 years ago
A SAD TALE.....

But a very enjoyable read. Excellent character development and your plot and their actions remained consistent with your characters. I noticed that some readers are skeptical to the plausibility of something like this ever happening. Let me assure them that not only is it possible but it does happen in and out of marriages and not always with the wife. The way you described Martha’s gradual behavior change after her sons left home and her resistance to seek psychiatric help is very plausible. Especially, when Mark and his sons pointed out observations earlier in her life that were definitely precursors of the same symptoms but of lesser magnitude. What caused these symptoms? We will never know because she is so much in denial that she feels there is nothing wrong with her because she is afraid to find out. Even today, having to be treated for mental health carries a stigma with it. Not only that but you also become an insurance risk. Something Executive Directors and CEOs look at before promoting someone. She is so comfortable in her current lifestyle and refuses to change or rather afraid to try. When she was faced with separation she tried to rekindle their marriage and could only go so far before she had to flee the situation. Even though her body responded to the sexual stimulation but when it was her turn to reciprocate her anxiety levels became so high she had to flee to a more comfortable environment in order to feel secure. Classic autonomic response. She was willing but just not strong enough to overcome the fear and anxiety. Fear and anxiety so strong she avoids any situations that could bring it on which includes seeking help. She’s trapped. It’s not very rational but it happens. Anxiety is worse than depression. Together you’re talking suicidal. Anyway, Great Story P.S. Well thought out. I feel sorry for Martha but no one can force her into treatment unless she becomes a danger to herself or others.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Role Reversal

Excellent demonstration of "things don't always appear as they seem". You take a cheating wife story, switch the roles then make the cheater out to be the victim. Very successfully too, I might add. Good stuff. Almost the mirror image of cheating wives right down to the rational people use to cheat.

AnonymousAnonymousover 14 years ago
fantastic

one of the best i have read on literotica...

AnonymousAnonymousover 14 years ago
Magnificent read!

Enjoyed every line of this well written and balenced story. Sadly I identified with a great deal of it but do not have the option of this characters course of action.

many thanks

AnonymousAnonymousover 14 years ago
Rare qualities, seldom seen here

An excellent story, well told. Wonderful character development and believeable behavior. This quality of story is seldom seen on literotica. I hope you continue writing this quality for a very long time. Now I have to read the rest of your work. Thanks for entertaining me. Anon jerry

AnonymousAnonymousover 14 years ago
Loved it

I had a hard time reading this because it is so much like my marriage is today. We've been together for 31 years. Year after year she seemed to need me less. She got to where she hated sex and wanted nothing to do with it. Everything I do meets with her diapproval. Why am I still with her? Two reasons. I love her beyond belief and always have. And, sadly, she controls all the money. It doesn't matter that I love her. She is a tough old bird and she would ruin me if I tried to leave her. At least your hero found a way to start over and live again. It gives people like me hope.

SkibumSkibumabout 14 years ago
One of my favorites

This, along with your version of Suspicion, is one of my favorites on the site. It may not be a very realistic situation, but the protagonist is a better man than I am in his approach to his problem. The story is very well written for an amature story site, and it was long enogh while keeping me interestede through the end.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 14 years ago
Great Story

Really enjoyed it. Thanks!

jasonnhjasonnhalmost 14 years ago
Well done

Very believable to me. I fully understand about being with a woman who finds it difficult to understand any one else's position but her own. My own personality is to accept the blame for issues myself rather than placing it on her where it belonged. As in this case, it's not that she was a bad person, just very inflexible in her beliefs and unable to understand others. Eventually you get to a point where you realize that your own happiness is at risk and you either need to take action or accept a miserable life. There is negative fallout of course but in the end you really don't have a choice unless you decide to sacrifice yourself completely. Some people make that choice and live miserable, desperate lives. That wasn't his choice and in the end everyone was better off because of it. Nice work.

kelly_kellykelly_kellyalmost 14 years ago
Great Series

Most of the times I like to read (and write) flash/short stories. I believe that flash/short stories are tough to write (It’s my thinking) coz you should have the right pace from start to finish, with a right plot that’ll entertain the readers.

When Harry inVa mentioned about this story in your latest story comments, I thought to take a look, and I’m glad I did it. Already a lot has been said, so I’ll join the crowd and say — it was a magnificent series right from chapter 01 to 05.

The writing techniques are so unique, and few of the scenes, their descriptions are of high quality and class. I highly recommend this story to aspiring writers. If at all in future I write a Novella — I’ll make sure to go through this one.

AnonymousAnonymousover 13 years ago
Well done author - great story and realistic ending.

A "fitting end" for a well told tale. Stupid bitch deserves to be lonely and frigid.

0649d0649dover 13 years ago
simpley albeit crudely: the most expensive pussy ever

$40,000 worth of jewellery? Damn she must be something special! He still hasn't met her price? huh..

A great story that few reviews could do justice to. I spent all night from 11pm up until 2:25am reading this! Hope to read some more stories, they're great! Take care!

bigguy323bigguy323over 13 years ago
My only criticism is the division of the assets of their marriage. He deserved AT LEAST HALF.

She was the cause of their divorce and she should have been taken to the cleaners. It's not like her VP job wouldn't provide for her.

She is a CUNT>

demantoiddemantoidover 13 years ago
i thoroughly enjoyed reading this story

What a gentle and believable tale with the right rhythm to drawn one into the characters and feel their emotions. A heartwarming story of coldness and heat, of family dynamics, of gracefully and ungracefully growing old. An excellent read with some hot sex to boot. Very well done!

tazz317tazz317over 12 years ago
FALLING IN COULD MEAN FALLING OUT

of love, friendship and partnership. TK U MLJ LV NV

TalonsreachTalonsreachover 12 years ago
Good story!

It could have used an editor to polish it up more but the overall story overshadowed the faults. Good Job!

Huedogg2Huedogg2over 12 years ago
I agree with bigguy

he deserved at least half, she was a bitch and a cold bitch at that. 5 Stars

FD45FD45over 12 years ago
I am going to say one negative thing

about a story I liked enough to read twice.

The little blurbs at the top of the story were not only unnecessary, but distracting. Since they weren't merely the last paragraph, nor a summary, but snapshots, I'm not exactly sure what they were there for.

But aside from that, I ranked this quite highly, though I'm not a huge fan of retired stories....even as I get closer to that time of life myself.

Thank you.

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago
Cool

Avery excellent observation of the loss of intimacy as one person draws away from the other. the consequences of disinterest in a love affair

IrfonIrfonalmost 12 years ago
What an amazingly good story !

The title for your story is so apt.

Many mid-life couples end up like your characters did - and I suspect that it's more common than many would believe.

Well written and sensitive - well done!

AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago
IF YOUR JUNK STILL WORKS USE IT!

It was a great story. A few lines I could not make sense of, but thats normal for me. They both knew what they wanted out of life but he did it. The rest is collateral damage.

BrettarnBrettarnover 11 years ago
Unfortunately

A really nice observation on an all too common situation. Well constructed and enjoyable reading without coming down too harshly on one side.

Drbeamer3333Drbeamer3333about 10 years ago
Enjoyed it

Very authentic. So many fight divorce out of comfort, rather than love.

LostOneThereLostOneTherealmost 10 years ago
Too close to being real life for comfort

Excellent story

sinstalkersinstalkeralmost 10 years ago
still

he is just another cheater.. if it were a female my how the comments would b much different.

sdc92078sdc92078almost 10 years ago
He just did what his wife wished he would do

In Chapter One she wished he would go find someone else to satisfy his needs. What he needed was what he wasn't getting from her, and that turned out to be everything.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 10 years ago
Cheating

No matter how you sugar coat it, he cheated on his spouse. What happened to all the BTB crowd calling for retribution of some sort.

I will say that having your spouse turn you down for physical intimacy consistently will change some of the bond and also affect your self confidence. However, it did not give him an excuse to "step out" on her per say.

Overall I like the writing and the pace of the story.

BrettarnBrettarnover 9 years ago
There but by the grace of.........

This tale is so real - yes he cheated, but the erosion of his self-esteem is dangerous. Been there, fortunately a compromise was reached and 30+ years weren't wasted.

TavadelphinTavadelphinover 9 years ago
Wow powerful stuff there

She drove him out -

She made it clear he was not welcome - so went elsewhere - not strictly kosher of course - he did try everything reasonable and more to get it fixed .

Now he can love and enjoy life again - Bon Chance!!

AnonymousAnonymousover 9 years ago
Thank you

Sadly I think this is exactly where my marriage is heading. All too common a story these days.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 9 years ago
Thanks

As someone else commented, my marriage is in the same state. I only wish I could afford to leave and start again. Very sad situation to be in.

xtchrxtchralmost 9 years ago
Intrigueing!

Yes, this is a very intriguing story. First of all he is a cheater....no excuses. And I have yet to come up with an acceptable reason to cheat. He should have made up his mind sooner and got the divorce first. He could have had the final conversation before he went to the massage parlor and saw that there was no way the wife was going to change. Divorce first and find someone else second. Thanks for a story with a very interesting premise.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
Cheating & adultery whats the difference?

One may say, Same difference. But there are striking differences, adultery as we all know is the sexual involvement of a spouse outside their marriage, legally speaking then without consent.

Cheating for some is definitely sexual by nature, but for others it could also include emotional & deceit(may be hiding something about your self), there can be varied scenarios that could constitute to be inferred as cheating towards a spouse.

I do agree with both above definitions but only partially on cheating, let me explain.

according to my world view, the sexual act is not cheating, its adultery, the lies & deceit used to cover the sex & the secret indignation towards the spouse by the adultering spouse encompass cheating, which in fact is one of the few crimes that cant be tried for unless you can prove a monetary/financial gain aspect of said cheating.

But this story has me at a quandary, Even though the husband here is the one committing adultery, i do have to agree that he is the one being cheated, as he explains his wifes cold demeanor towards sex, i also strongly agree as people get accustomed to "having it all" in their life (a.k.a Affluenza/ white people probs),

their emotional dragnet of apathy tends to envelope the people close to them too, thus detaching themselves from the people actually emotionally invested in them. i do believe that menopause can have drastic effects on some, but overlooking it is the major reason to suffer from its effects. we can never know if something is wrong with us, visiting a doc/ having tests is as good as brushing your teeth, we do brush our teeth right?, then why feel bad if somebody suggests us to visit a doc, its for our own benefit after all, this is where HIPPA shine like a beacon in a desolate winter, when HIPPA guidelines stictly prohibit medical staff from even disclosing to the father that the child borne by his wife may not be his, why you ask? to protect the child from facing a cruel situation for no fault of its own, even though it may be cruel to the father. The same way HIPPA also is there to prevent your medical condition become a stigma for you as the information was discovered by somebody, mental ills, to std, all ailments are under HIPPA to help the person who would suffer by disclosure of medical history of a person, so if she could take the advice & see a doc i bet the husband would not have gone with the divorce even if no medical reason was there. but her stubbornness to see no fault in her actions is quite surprising.

& now, to the real world scenario, many a time its women who crave intimacy post departure of their kids from their homes, sex has become a chore, & doing something for fun seems a distant memory, of course the stats are in more men do commit adultery than women, but i strongly believe that more men are caught than women, i would say the cheating is 50-50, why? because i think people dont realise that marriage is a long term "affair", simply put, for darkness to spread, all you have to do is wait, till the candle gives out. i.e if you dont put an effort to cherish you spouse everyday, or once in a while, the marriage will rust & corrode, its just a matter of time.

primarily this happens because people marry for the wrong reasons. lust & love can often get convoluted, also obligation & opportunity are very wrong reasons to marry anyone,

my simple unsolisictated advice, we all are, imperfect & incomplete individuals,be with a person who would complete you, even if its for a moment, your life will be perfect for having known that person

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
My Life in Print

I just read this series and wow...the author could be spying on my life! I am mid fifties and my boys are all out of the house (college and beyond)...and my wife (my high school sweat heart) has decided she no longer needs/craves sex..at all! I have tried everything..good hubby/bad hubby, romantic trips, suggesting we "talk" with someone and she get a check-up from her doctor....all have been declined. She is absolutely great at everything else: mother, cook, keeps the house and even works part time but there is no sexual relations of any kind...an no...she is not cheating on me! She says she really doesn't think about sex any more....

This story has hit home more than any other I have read..not had sex with her in over two years...not even on Valentines Day or our Anniversary... she got dinners/presents etc...I got a "thank you".

Not sure how much longer I can last...I DON"T want to cheat and DO want to honor my vows but knowing that I am going to spend the next 10 years like this before maybe I loose interest in sex is a killer.

Please ladies...tell me that you have some desires for sex after 50..or are all of us guys doomed? Is this why guys go looking for younger women? I certainly can afford to be a "sugar daddy"....but that is not what I am looking for. Wish me luck.

dyonysosdyonysosalmost 8 years ago
Frigid after 50

Some people are just not sexual,this goes for men and woman,earlier in life there can be some exitment but over the years it grows less and less until it becomes non-existant,for some the 40-45 age become for some people a jump start for others however it is actually the end of theyr active sexlife ,past 50 it is siberia,nothing

I 'm sure we al know people past the 50 year point who have sex once in 2-3 months if it is that much,woman at this point have menopause and can become frigid because of that,others become more active,it all depends on people and theyr approach to sex

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 8 years ago
I have to agree with the point about his timing.

If Stephanie had not come into his life I suspect the marriage would have still ended, but in a more honorable and appropriate manner. Martha was sick, and he had vowed to stay with her in sickness and in health. If he had somehow become incurably impotent, would he allow Martha to go have sex with others? Maybe he would, but I think he would consider it a type of abandonment. So his actions were dishonorable and out of sync.

He should have forthrightly confronted Martha about their lack of intimacy and given her the alternative to seek advice or end the marriage. From your description of the character I believe the marriage would have eventually ended, but that would allow him the honor of having tried, and removed any alibi Martha had that he had dumped her for another woman. While that distinction would be important for me, I guess for him, once he found Stephanie, he simply wanted to move on to this more loving and sensual partner.

I think your epilogue would have been more realistic if it had included Martha acquiring an impotent senior successful companion. An old man with a limp dick and money still likes company, and the attractive successful Martha would have been some dignified low maintenance arm candy. All his old cronies would think he's getting laid by a beautiful younger woman, while Martha could enjoy her platonic marriage with a convenient undemanding traveling and dinning companion. I suspect that is how she will end up, and more power to her, if that's what she wants.

Thank you for a very interesting exploration of this issue. I think it is way more common than is widely known, for both genders. I think most older spouses just accept it and hang in there for the sake of pride, to avoid humiliation, and for their children. In marriage, you don't always get what you want, but you always get what you settle for. I'm glad you main character did not settle.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 8 years ago
I saw several comments that

this was an interesting premise and other seemingly intelligent considerations of this "situation". First of all I enjoyed the writing and way the tale was presented. I read a sad but thoughtful story which described what seemed to me like a very believable problem for all involved from her to him and the children. I can't even start to give a personal opinion because It's not me. I'm not sure any of them were entirely happy with the way it turned out but the self survival parts were only that and on an emotional level not a way that could be explained just by right or wrong or happy ending any of us would have wanted. It reminded me that so often there are no good answers or fairy tale endings that we all wish for. And as I read somewhere "Life goes on". Thanks for what I thought was a reminder that all doesn't "work out" the way we might have wished. Not a comfortable thought but more true than not. / Scotty /slowrdr@aol.com

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
well worth the time

I spent reading your story. Faced much the same situation, but the variables of my situation dictated a different result for me. We lived separately for years, but on the same property having two houses on our acreage. I took her back in when her cancer required someone look after her.

I spent time trying to develop another relationship but nothing lasted more thn a few years

AnonymousAnonymousabout 7 years ago
Amen Brother!

I certainly agree with you Annom. RE: My life in print. There's probably a lot more of us out here than anyone knows. At least in this case, the man finally had enough to deal with his "Martha" problem and not continue to live in a loveless marriage. Reading this story and seeing this situation (instead of living it) makes me think that it is time to do something about my own situation.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 7 years ago
Well played!

An entertaining story. No bitches got burned. No husbands were thrown off the cliff. Nobody got maimed or died (unless you count John). And everybody was happy in the end. This felt like an examination of a real life marriage. Again - well done. Thanks for the story.

SomeOneTwoThreeSomeOneTwoThreealmost 7 years ago
Once apon a time.......

What a fairytale!

The guy hangs on to a dead marriage for years.

Takes humiliation and abuse almost without

reaction.

Puts the icing on the cake by becoming

the ice queens handy man, after the devorce.

What a f**king whimp!

And not just that, a cheater too!

But........the story is well written, I'll give it that.

And I read it all way through. Hoping the whimp

would turn into a man. Alas.

There are a lot of whimps out there and I hope

some enjoyed reading this story more than I did.

senorlongosenorlongoover 6 years ago
I was relieved when I read Mark's comment about their incompatability

I felt very early in the story that they were really ill-suited to each other physically and probably emotionally right from the start, but that it had been hidden in their early years by their desire to have a family. I'm in my 70's and I know how things can sneak up on a person, especially when you're not looking for the problem. In many ways this is a tragic story that turns out well in the end for all involved. Martha got her promotion which obviously meant more to her than her husband or her marriage. Mark got a caring woman whose sexuality rivaled his and Stephanie got a life companion, lover, and dance partner. One, two--cha, cha, cha!

AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago
Senorlongo

What he said. Sad story with an inexorable pace like cars slipping on ice- the crash is coming, but so slowly! Thanks. 5 stars. JPR

tazz317tazz317over 6 years ago
AND STILL SHE DAWDLES

but now its solo time, TK U MLJ LV NV

AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago

A good read about a good guy with a lot of patience and a wife with a lot of personal problems.

AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago

Unsettlingly close to my own story, although I lacked the insight and guts to take the steps Mark did. She finally ended the marriage complaining about my unhappiness with her. I wish I had been able to read this 15 years ago.

AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago

Thoroughly enjoyable series, great read!

MusicGuy4FunMusicGuy4Funover 6 years ago
Autism?

She has many signs and symptoms of Aspergers' syndrome. The inability to see other points of view is pretty much the signature of the syndrome, but the inability to tolerate intimacy or even touching is a close second.

I have autistic & Aspergers friends, and they can benefit from knowing how they are different. She should see a psychologist.

Ib_SaysIb_Saysover 6 years ago

You know, the autism angle is a pretty insightful suggestion, not something I had considered.

I didn't like the ending all that much since there never was a good explanation or solution to Martha's 'attitude'. It made the story feel somewhat incomplete.

EzrollinEzrollinover 6 years ago
...excellent...

A story that many men and probably a few women can relate too. I can't help but think you wrote this in part from a first hand experience because it was right on the mark. I 've read a few stories here that I consider first rate and this is one of them. One reader didn't like the ending because it didn't explain Martha's condition. It could be physical or psychological but does it matter, she didn't care enough to find out. My only criticism and it is meant to be constructive are the recaps...much too long, a line or two would suffice. Overall an excellent insightful story... looking forward to reading more of your works. This is a five star story!!!

AnonymousAnonymousabout 6 years ago
PERFECT

Yeah, I know, nothing is perfect. But thats the word that came to me when I finished this story.

Mark's well thought out responses during the confrontation are better than could be in real time (an author has plenty of time to consider the response plus controls what the wife says back), but that's just part of what made it so good.

I noticed no spelling/grammar problems.

I think readers who want analysis of Martha's problem have missed the point. Mark did not (could not) get an analysis, so that's why the reader doesn't.

And i liked Mark.

Belongs in category Top Series on Literotica.

Paul in Oklahoma

QuietlyLurkingQuietlyLurkingabout 6 years ago
While I enjoyed this one...

I can't imagine that it would have been nearly as well received if the cheating protagonist had been a woman.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 6 years ago
Sad but very realistic.

Perhaps it is sadder because the end when it came, came from no desire to cheat but simply from being starved of affection. The marriage became one of convenience, convenient for Martha but purgatory for Mark. I'm dubious about any character's stated need for sex though. I think too often wants are confused with needs. I see it as more of a balanced health and well being issue than a basic need. In this case, had she been willing to be in any way more affectionate it might have survived. She just had no give and take.

Great Story.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 6 years ago
Solid story.

A very solid and realistic story. I'm still amazed it's told from the the cheater's point of view and I still enjoyed. What he did was wrong the divorce came too late. He waited too long for his wife to change her behavior. In any case I truly enjoyed the reading and gave it 5 stars to each one of the chapters.

StormKing33StormKing33over 5 years ago
5* Solid Tale

I met a girl somewhat similar to Martha and it lasted two dates. Yay!

PowersworderPowersworderover 5 years ago

It was a very interesting story and well written.

I actually didn't see what Mark did as cheating. Martha basically ended the marriage when she withdrew from all forms of intimacy from her husband. It wasn't just the sex, she just didn't want to be touched by him. He tried to save their marriage dozens of times over the years, but she vehemently rebuffed his every attempt.

There was nothing physically wrong with Martha, because she was able to climax and still got wet for him. Sadly this was all psychological, or as another comment pointed out, she probably had Aspergers. In either case Martha refused to even acknowledge there was a problem, so divorce was inevitable.

notredame43notredame43over 5 years ago
nicely done

A unique as well as i think painful thing to see in the real world. She has some issue and even when he throws down the gauntlet to shock her and gives her even more time to seek help as to why she is this way... she refuses. The sons see her unwilling to look at another POV for any reason on even other subjects.. Very good job PS 5 stars. well written paced and the characters are all fleshed out to be tangible

Schwanze1Schwanze1over 5 years ago
I would suggest this as required reading

for any wife or bride to be.

Oh, and for you women, a rain check is NOT a yes. It's a no same as any other no. Use it enough and you may find out personally that half the population is female and some percentage of those will be happy to take care of your man with more enthusiasm and frequency than you.

Schwanze1Schwanze1over 5 years ago
Anon 3/21/18

You are absolutely wrong. For some, maybe most, young men, it is definitely a need. More like an imperative.

You young women, don't let your young husbands go without more than a few days. If he wants it, give it to him with enthusiasm lest someone else take care of that for you. If you aren't in the mood, you can figure out how to get it over quickly. A quick blowjob every time won't work in the long run, but it will likely work just fine in the short run.

cybojicybojiover 5 years ago
S man is right

Leave your man to fend for himself, he will. He might not today, but look out for tomorrow. This was a great story and is similar to my former marrige and to some of my friends. Tomorrow came. 5

AnonymousAnonymousover 4 years ago
men are expected

to keep up with a sexually active wife.

men are expected to keep up with her life, too. if it's a busy one, tough shit...make time for her. doesn't matter if you have a career and kids as a husband.

i'd like to point to the 'shocked pikachu' meme fits the ex wife perfectly...when it's revealed that SHE has to put in some effort. i mean...for pities sake...AIR KISSES?

If she really hates intimacy that much, why bother being married?

we also never addressed the sudden sexual skill she displayed their last time. maybe she prefers cheating sex? we'v already established she likes to be in control cares more about her job sees her hubby as a handyman and emotional provider only and gets oddly accusatory about him. seems like a classic list of cheater red flags. she prolly does hate intimacy, but prolly enjoys dominating men related to her work.....for one-night-stands. it would explain her behaviors slightly better.

doesn't matter if she cheated or not. she's still broken every other vow, but it does seem like she was the initial cheater.

management91399management91399about 4 years ago

She's kind of a Praying Mantis, now that she's mated and they've raised the kids his usefulness is diminished except for the stereotypical roles a man is supposed to fulfill around the house. Except he's doing a bit more. I kept waiting for there to be some sort of religious fanaticism or reasoning behind it, the Catholic idea that sex is for procreation not recreation and once the kids left the nest that part of their relationship is over. Very methodical, reminiscent in a way of Camus The Stranger.

But I wouldn't go as far as pronouncing her autistic if showing affection or have sex had a purpose she acquiesced, but the husband is only seen as a provider and a sperm donor not a true equal or object of affection, I almost want to say not human but in this woman's view his purpose was to procreate and then facilitate.

The real interesting thing is finding this gem for the first time in 2020 and going back through the comments from the last ten years and reading all the, "This is My Life, This is Me" Tragic. Someone should make a discussion group topic on this story and let us know where you are today and if you are still in this situation. (I am not but I have empathy for those who are hurting)

WhoGivesAShitWhoGivesAShitabout 4 years ago

Excellent series. Martha seems to have taken the stereotypical ‘only to procreate’ attitude to an extreme. Unfortunately I know of a family where a family of 6 (3 boys, I girl) lived in a 2 bedroom house. The wife denied her husband, and slept in one room with the daughter, while husband slept in a room with the sons. If they’d had more rooms, the mother still wouldn’t have slept in the same room as her husband. Cut off of intimacy, he husband sexually abused his sons, who all suffered lifelong damage: one is a miserable person who’s completely intolerant, one divorced when he realized he’s gay, and one was convicted of manslaughter after waking in bed with a dead woman and no memory of the night before. Mark and his sons were fortunate.

SkubabillSkubabillover 3 years ago

What a great storyteller

TeggeTeggeabout 3 years ago

feels like I'm part of the story...very real for me! Thanks.

WargamerWargamerabout 3 years ago

An excellent story, I enjoyed it a lot

Well worth the 5/5 l gave it

AnonymousAnonymousabout 3 years ago

Lack of emotion and intimacy IE touches, sleeping in same room, hugs, looks and making love can have serious consequences on any relationship or marriage

AileyInnAileyInnalmost 3 years ago

I can’t help but think that there are numerous 50s and 60s year olds that are identifying with this. Most of us conclude that we are just horny old men living beyond our prime. Looking for a magic solution!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 3 years ago

WOW! This pretty much described my relationship with my wife. She is 'touchaphobic' and refuses to even be close to me. I as well thought that she was repelled by me to the point of being unable to touch me or wanting to be touched by me. We've been married 30 years and have two grown children. For the last two years I have been considering finding a FWB relationship but have not done anything so far.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 3 years ago

Parts of Martha could describe my first wife but luckily for me we divorced in my 30's. I was able to find someone who was a much better fit for me. This was a well written story.

Badwolf8015Badwolf8015over 2 years ago

Great story. I think they are many men around the world that can interact with your story.

AnonymousAnonymousover 2 years ago

I am going to have to put a lot of the blame on the husband for putting up with this type of abuse, disrespect, and manipulation for so long... I can understand several, up to maybe 6, months, then there would have to be Sunday come to meeting time and some serious resolutions... but, to allow onesself to be humiliated and abused for years signifies some serious problems, not only with the wife, but also with the husband... his solutions are not realistic... like the wife who sought no help for her inadequacies, he had gotten no real help for his problems, being a constant victim, and moving in with another female right after a divorce is no solution... just another disaster/disapointment waiting to happen.

Wolfgang1955Wolfgang1955over 2 years ago

Most irritating thing. Is your sonoppses at the begging of each chapter. If your readers can't remember the should read Dr Seuss

servant111servant111over 2 years ago

There is really a psychological/medical term for the condition that is portrayed in this: "Intimacy Anorexia." It is all over the search engines. I know it because my wife has had it for 20 years. She mirrors all the behaviors shown here... We have slept in separate beds for almost 15 years now and she stopped wanting sex about 15 years ago. She refuses to consider or even discuss her condition...and progressively slips into the unconscious arrogance that these utter self focused individuals exhibit. Unlike the slutwife who refuses to stop surrendering to her carnal impulses; a wife in intimacy anorexia is utterly indifferent to any emotional issues in the marriage whatsoever.

Living like someone like this is like living in a monastic environment and it is exactly how it is portrayed here. Women that develop this condition do not get better....because their better is to be utterly indifferent. You cannot counsel or "fix" this condition...so like the husband.. your only real option is to stay with them for the money or memories if you are an old fart like me...or stop visiting the graveside of your dead marriage and move on to a newer and hopefully better future with a better soulmate.

servant111servant111over 2 years ago

This is probably the best story describing the psychological condition "Intimacy Anorexia" that I have come across. PostScriptor has done an outstanding job developing this story series which reads like my daily life. If you are young enough...like the protagonist...LEAVE THIS TOMB!!!!! A woman who has this condition simply cannot be cured. Either you stay and die inside each day; or you end the marriage ASAP and start a new life. Virtually ANY woman is better that one with Intimacy Anorexia even a slut provides some recognition of your basic existence. Staying with an Intimacy Anorexic is like being married to Mr. Spock.

other2other1other2other1about 2 years ago

I really enjoyed the story, a lot of the writing is subtle and very descriptive.

I have to admit, that the entire story mad be sad though, Martha will never regret what she did to her husband, she just regrets that she didn’t control it. Another thing I picked up is that she expected gifts, but he never got any from her. Take aside the lack of sex, she never did anything for him. I.e. He cooked the steaks for them, he bought her gifts and he gave her an orgasam. She never did anything. He did well to leave her. But she will never have any regret about what she did to him.

Great story series!

GoattimeGoattimeabout 2 years ago

This story is horribly familiar. I've the same type of wife, dawn it.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 2 years ago

Thanks for this storey. I think it will strike a chord with quite a few people - I know it does for me. The need for physical contact within a relationship is vastly underrated, and you have captured it well. I think that I will have a look at your other stories. Well written, flows nicely and you really get to like the main character. A story I will probably read again.

tinfoilhattinfoilhatabout 2 years ago

This was A very good story. I recognized so much in my life reflected here.

Rhoan1921Rhoan1921about 2 years ago

Thank you for not going soft on the story line, this way a much better haooy ending.

tompo296tompo296almost 2 years ago

I loved reading this story again. I too recognised a similar pattern in my life especially in the first two parts. Super writing and relating to some of your audience

TrambakTrambakalmost 2 years ago

This looks like a common problem but not many speak of it.

Can someone be asexual?

Yes, they can.

Are they otherwise good spouses?

Yes.

Is it possible to co-exist?

Okay. That's a tough ask.

mattenwmattenwover 1 year ago

A really very well told story with a really unusual problem between two partners. It is unbelievable that an intelligent woman cannot recognize that she has a real partnership problem and cannot accept help from a competent third party!

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