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English
Asshole
His lack of consideration for her concerns makes this akin to rape.
Yeah,
this kid seems cruel and it came off as rape more than a seduction. Totally taking advantage of her in an obviously still emotionally fragile state. What's with the name calling? How did he end up secretly despising her? Because of her neediness and vulnerability?
Learn to read
Hey folks learn to read the comments at the start of the story. It's fiction. That said, the story was told in a little too detached manner but okay. Kind of clinical. Maybe spend more effort on the character development and set the scenes more completely. Little confused too about his age. He knew the daughters as babies, so he must be what, 30ish if the daughters are 20 somethings. Then who cares what his mother thinks.
Dude you need Psychological help!!
You definitely dont like women, chill a bit before you have a stroke!!!
Can hardly wait for the sequel
This story start a bit uneven and rough - but it REALLY got all the intensity you want. Please let the sequel be just as intense as the beginning (if possible)
Good start Bad Finish
You got two story lines. When the lady says no that means no!!!!!!!!.
Respect
is something that you don't have for women. Fetishes? No you aren't going with your fetishes, you are just young and inexperienced. You say that you are 18 to 22. well take some time off from trying to write about something that you don't have a clue about. Experience life, and when in a few years when you finally figure out that women wouldn't put up with your crap and continue to dump you, you may change your attitude towards them. You're actually more than just a little sick.
love it
love every part of it... waiting for part II
keep it up dude
i really cant understand the above comments about 'him' taking advantage of 'her' , no respect for ladies etc etc . . . this is a story and something we are supposed to use in our fantasies. . why give it the beating of feminism !! i agree the end was a bit abrupt but otherwise its good . . keep it up man :-)
Prick
You my friend are a dead set cunt I mean dead
settle down folks
he aint an asshole, or cruel, He's cocky, as is every other 18-22 man on the planet. He still thinks a man can "own" a woman, which as we learn later in life this is folly! no man has even succeeded in enslaving a woman of doin what she didnt want (short of rape of course). as to one of the comments earlier, NO can mean YES at times..
In short the author is a KID... we can only hope he grows up someday!
Beautiful
Please, do continue this story. It was so hot, and I and many others have had similar thoughts about our mother's friends...
Refreshing story
What a change to read a story of seduction and taking feelings into account instead of the usual quick grope and straight fucking within minutes. Can't wait for sequel
Lost the plot
Started off ok then went rapidly down hill with him wanting to control her...why?
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