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A Father's Desire

bymikeaday©
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by Anonymous

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by Anonymous08/01/09

wow wow real nice

is this ur fantasy or ist real if it was real must to be nice to have ur own daughter in that position ur the luckiest guy

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by Azshade09/15/09

Not bad, not my subject matter

Saw your post on the forum, so decided to take a look. It's not a bad story, though I'm personally not into watersports. Regardless, it wasn't bad, has a nice potential to go somewhere.

If I'm going to be honest though, it was a little too heavy in the descriptions. You don't have to describe everything, not even physical descriptions. Often it's better to let the reader form their own mental image. If the image is required for the story, than cover it briefly.

But, I don't mean to nag, and it's YOUR story, you can write it how you wish. Good work.

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