by p_c352006
So far the best of your stories is Ch. 05 as there was a lot more teasing and "foreplay". Good story, but you can definitely lengthen it and describe things a bit more...each act of sex is only about 5 sentences before the next encounter occurs. Prolong each moment (at least a paragraph or more for each guy) and describe the environment, the sights, the smells, the feelings as she takes on each guy.<br><br>
You did well describing the lap dance (although the paragraphs before it felt "rushed") but then boom, 3 paragraphs she's done by 6 guys and the story is over. I like your writing style, just do not rush things! :)
A wonderful fantasy story that every young man has dreamed.