Tell It to the Judge

Well Written

Fucking around on a cop partner is not a good idea, not a happy story but well written, actually like a real husband would react, Thanks.

what was this,no back ground of wife problem

she was about to tell him what.

Pretty sloppy.

The story was okay but the mistakes were too many. "My sister's wife"(?) is one example. Proofread and be less concerned about the volume of stuff you post. Quality over quantity.

was there an actual story there somewhere?

could of been a good one. But whats the excuse? He drugged me?

Ok it seems the gangster/criminal was using drugs on SOME of the women. MAYBE the cop's wife. MAYBE.

so she was drugged the 1st time a few weeks ago. She didnt stop. She didnt confess.

Think about it. A cop's wife says "a gansgter drugged me and rappd me." Of course the cop in this story would LIKELY believe her NO questions asked!

Instead she seems to have-- of course the story and background is kind of short-- gone out of her way to fuck the gangster REGARDLESS of the tough position her husband a COP was put in.

The wife's sister reaction was also telling. She didnt plead with brother in law for help. She spat at him!. This implies the wife's sister hated the husband for a number of deeply disturbed twisted reasons and that the wife had emotionally left the husband and sided with the sister.

INTERESTING

SHAME TO LEAVE OFF AND FINISH THERE. A LITTLE BACKGOUND ETC WOULD HAVE FLESHED IT OUT. LIKED THE POLICE TWIST. SENTENCING AND BAIL... COURT ROOM ACTION AND OR CONFRONTATION AFTERWARDS WOULD HAVE BEEN GOOD.

Step down folks I liked this. Yeah it ended fast

But a whore is a whore even if she is married to someone even a cop. They need to be arrested, jailed, and on the watch list. He needs to divorce the slag asap, because when she gets out she will clean him out. Knowing you are married to a whore should make your skin crawl knowing the diseases and related issues you have been exposed to unknowingly. Some people think being married to sex worker would be exciting. I guess it would be for pimps, cucks, and people with no self esteem or sense of self worth. Can you hear it, hey the gal you paid to fuck last night is my wife, laffs. Trash is trash, she and the sister are trash. Throw them both away.

You are cursed by

Matt Mareau curse. It is very dangerous than swine flu & bird flu. Get well soon.

Interesting.

Given the warning that the lack of set-up and final resolution was present at the beginning, I'd have to say that the story is nicely packaged. (There could have been an entire, much longer story, covering all of those details, but this is the essential element concisely presented.) -- KK in Texas

Short,and fast moving, but complete

Very well done, even though the story was short, there was nothing left out, the story told everything that it needed.Thanks for the story........Rich

Bad... and derivative.

I think Britease wrote this story solely to get some positive comments (which his standard wimp husband stories never get). Unfortunately, there was absolute zero character development and the ubiquitous bar fight and of course the husband had to be a COP....... I have also read a story very close to this one here or on storiesonline. So maybe we also have some bad plagiarism or plot theft.

LOL

Had to laugh at the gangster's surname name, Bray. You could have even moved closer to the originals if you had named them Reggie and Ronny...

Good luck

This is a plot outline.

Sounds like it might have been interesting. But zero description of character, setting, almost everything that should have been developed in the plot. Sure you wanted the "surprise" at the end, but to get that you sacrificed the whole story line. 25 for what might have been.

Has a hardboiled flavor to it

Your story has a style not unlike some of the modern noir stories I've read. Good work.

I see a part two to this. Perhaps it really was the drugs and there's hope after all.

Lot os fun!

It is good to encounter something to enjoy. They are few and far between of late! There could be all sorts of explications of why the cops were there, and the girls. The future será que será.
By the way, that small error that one of the commentators jumped on suggest to me that you subconsciously applied the Latin word order... Been speaking too much French, of late?
Thanks!

Nice one.

Guys why so down on Britease? This is a perfect little vignette. So some stuff is left to our imagination. So what? Is it really that difficult to use your imagination? What we have here is what you would see as a bystander. Getting a story down to its essentials can be difficult, and is a good exercise for a writer. Brit, as ever, a story that portrays a real possibility.

Short and Sweet

I try not to get more out of a story than the author put in. Sometimes it is difficult to do so, but I am getting better at it. Thanks for writing

depressing story

The writing was fine but the plot was depressing. The only question is why he waited so long to break up the orgy.
60 year old George

Taking the story just for what it was,

I found it humorous.

I equally find it funny that the author says:

No real sex --- no background --- no happy ending. It's not that sort of story

Yet I still read a comment here about the lack of "background" for the characters. Well there was a tiny bit, right when he says:

I'd always thought myself so lucky to have married a girl as beautiful as Lindsey, with her striking long blonde hair, shapely body and large firm breasts.

I'd fell head over heels in love with her within a week of first meeting her, and we'd been married within six months.

So it was there, just a more "limited" background, but the Author said not to expect it.

But 60 year old George really got me with the: "Why did he wait so long to break up the orgy" comment. Personally I thought it was because of these comments:

I started to make a move on them, but Mike held me back, warning me that I might wish to think twice about it, and indeed the seven big thugs who were sat at their table.

He was right of course, the seven men in question being the Bray twins and their gang, the most feared and ruthless bunch of criminals in South London. Not the sort of guys that anyone with any sense would want to mess with.

Not to mention he was there to bust them for "Drugs" and you know he would actually have to see them doing drugs before he could arrest them. If his wife wasn't where she was supposed to be, doing what she wasn't supposed to, with men who weren't her husband, you know I can't fault him for letting her be rounded up with the other drug pushing trash.

So I think the answers to both of those statements were contained in the story that "I" read. I have to wonder what the others were reading. (^_^)

lol well now

he has plenty of ammunition for the divorce....and what will she get after a cpl days in jail and having her family have to see not only her but her sister also booked for prostitution....maybe she will give it to hubby free afterwards trying to get back in his good graces..hope she gets what she deserves

Liked the story

Liked the story, but the ending sort of left me hanging.
A little more to the ending would have made it a great story.

It's not nice to fool around on a cop

It just gets you a whole lot of trouble.

Thanks for sharing.

Not bad at all

My only real criticism of the story is that the author segued into the narrator’s status as a cop leading a raid with no warning or back story – a sort of deus ex machina if you will.








So long as the story was one of a police raid – starting with that – and it scoops up the narrator’s wife “by mistake” it would work better






"I warned you prick face," the guy in front of me screamed at me as he made his lunge, his huge fist flying through the air towards me.

It never got there.

It never arrived.
IN HTML










It never got there. and It never arrived are redundant

Bravo ! ! ! ! !

I really liked this one. Now you need a follow up on the divorce and her going to prison where you get everything.

okay, but the story isn't finished

Britease, this story's fine to this point. I mean to say that beyond this we don't know what brought about the action at the club you describe. What led up to this story ---- and, additionally, what is to happen now. You stories are generally quite good reads! RAG

Very good flash.

It was a very good flash story. From a selfish point of view, would like you to take it and expand it into a full fleged story.

Good

For me, the story is finished.

Boyd

Good, as far as it goes!

The story is unique in that it violates the basic rules of story development. Still, it does convey a fucked up wife getting her just desserts. But it does stand to be improved through expansion and follow-up. There is a lot by way of character development and explanation, historical framework regarding the plot, and treatment of "what happens next?" that can be written.

But I fear the author won't, because the abbreviated nature of the story seems to suggest that the author believes he has found a new or different story approach. C'est fini!

Ok Good story

I'm sure that all husbands would like to arrest their cheating wife

A different but interesting ending from Britease!

We actually liked this one because it was short, to the point and the consequences matched the situation. For once, we did not have some miserable male idiot suffer months of humiliation & other such bull shit [which is typical of this author's usual fare]. Of course, this particular story is only a glimpse of this sad tale but hopefully this seemly non-wimp husband will dump out the slut wife along with the rest of the trash and not recycle this obvious whore.

Are any of you married? or ever been?

if you're married and your wife is that much of a whore, and you don't know... you're an asshole and you deserve everything!

Hi everyone

Response so far is more or less as I expected!

Some good --- some not so good!. fair enough!

Sorry about the sister's wife bit, but as some one has pointed out (thank you) in French that would be how you might say it --- Sorry!

I write for my fun and for the reation! I admit it, and obviously I get it, being yet again top of the comments portal. Sorry, but that's what turns me on, and keeps me going.

Thanks everyone

Britease

Good story

Satisfaction doesn't always end with an orgasm. You could take it further but having said what was necessary you ended ...... I was satisfied.

Good stuff!

Well written, and an original twist. I look forward to more! Sean

please continue

Please follow up with this one. I know it is against your usual policy, but I would love to see her explain this one....
Thanks!

Britease, we're getting to you....

... either that or you spent some time on a dude ranch recently.Harry is able to come up with enough complaints and what ifs to critique a novel, and it's only a "flash" story as another pointed out.You must be on to something!Pistolpackinpete

I know you like to leave some of your stories...

... kind of hanging like this, but I think this one is just "too unfinished." Too many loose ends and the overall feeling I get is that the husband wants more of an explanation. I have no doubt he'll go through with letting them throw the book at his soon-to-be-ex-wife, but I feel he wants to hear more of the story.

Very Good!!!

Hey Britease, make a sequel!!!
Something like "Tell It to the Judge- The Trial". I´m curious to know what the stupid wife will say...

I agree with

"I know you like to leave some of your stories...". Although I understand the point of these very short stories, I feel there is another story here - the wife's. Plus all the little side stories like having his wife as part of the arrest, associating with a criminal. The impact of that on the case and him. anyway - thanks for the stories and good luck with you writing.

What's with the negative comments

It was a short to the point story. Well written. Not every story has to be spelled out in great detail, to be psychoanalyzed to death. Read it for what it is and let it go at that. Well done author, always enjoy reading your stories, good or bad you keep us entertained.

Great Story

Loved the twist at the end ! Needs a 2nd chapter to smooth out the rough ends though. Good story, when you are left wanting more !

Fun read....

Enjoyable. Didn't mind that it was short or didn't met Harry's definition of a story...Thank you.

not.!

Did I just read a real story of some sort.!

Okay story.

Could have been a little longer and you know of course that you really should write a follow on story where the wife tries to explain what's going on. Of course I can not imagine any way that she could but then it's your story.

Written as if you were in a hurry

To use a pun, if you had fleshed out the characters and the story this could have been good. As it was I didn't care for him or her or anyone in the story. Maybe the judge would, but I doubt it.

Great Story

The problem many authors have is that they drag out a story needlessly. This works the way it is. Perfect.

Very well done

No waste of words, to the point and concise. Very well done!

Outstanding!

He treated her like the whore she was. I thought it was a really great story.

Dont give a shit....

I fucking loved it!!!!!!! LOL

Thanks Brit. Great story

Totally rock with those stories about men with their junk still intact

more all whores should die from aids n