All Comments on 'Apartment 409'

More please...and quick! You have the gift!

I really liked the hip, youthfulness of your piece. The apartment, the garage bands, the reference of 'The City' (newyork, yeah?) all fit very nicely. I'm going to go ahead and assume that you are around 24, same as your character, mostly be cause I'm 23 and your writing conveyed your age rather deftly. To be honest, I love reading erotic literature but it just seems as though almost all of the contributors, around here at least, are older writers trying to write as though they're sexier and more youthful. It's refreshing to see a piece that's so believable and I can identify with as much as I could with yours. That said, you could afford to downplay your excessive use of hyperbole; "wettest ever" "louder than ever", get your experiences under more control and focus on the sensory aspects and I'm sure your writing will profit. Thanks for the read.