homeSci-Fi & FantasyThe Legend of Great Falls Ch. 01Public Comments

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The Legend of Great Falls Ch. 01

byTimWLy©
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by Anonymous

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by IdleAltruism07/15/09

Needs a lot of work

The story is hard to read from the beginning. It's choppy, and the beginning descriptions are awkward. A good storyteller weaves description into the story, not start the story off by describing the character in every detail.

As a side note, I did get a chuckle out of 5,8" 225 lbs.

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