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English
Multi Parter
Please put 01 in the title so I won't waste my time!
Sloppy
Poor spelling, lousy word choice clumsy sentence structure and not a very good feel for the periods about which you're writing. On the plus side it was short, so at least I didn't waste all that much time with it.
Pity, in the hands of a decent writer the basic idea could yield a good story. Of course, in the hands of decent writers it already has -- nothing even approaching original in the writing either.
You had me laughing out loud ...
... at "She reached the first button of his shit"! But I suspect you weren't trying to be funny. So - more proofreading needed. The story itself seems to be good.
UhOh (author)
Hey guys in my defense I was perrrrrdi tipsy when I wrote this, and I probably won’t correct it. So love how she buttoned his shit! Just kidding, but seriously sorry for the grammar and sentence structure ☺
Corrections
I dont know where you come from but a loogaroo is a werewolf, and in no way possible is a loogaroo able to make people into vampires, you need to research your stories more before you write them, when facts arent right people wont take you seriously
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